Pickles In The Cooler
61I'm Telling You, THEY'RE EVIL!
The Garden Of My Life
I love a garden. A garden does not always love me. In anxious eagerness to be living off the land, one year I spent many hard days on my knees digging in the Oklahoma red sand. I've never had really strong knees and so I normally dug and planted quickly. Not to be outdone by my husband-who-grew-up-on-a-farm, I firmly told him I could plant the asparagus without any help. And, so I did. Trouble was, no one told the me the raggedy-mop appearance part of the plant went underground, not on top. So, my upside-down-asparagus didn't sprout a sprout. Not a green leaf. It was the laughing stock of the family/neighborhood and caused me many years in therapy.
Being wiser now, I pick, Lynn plants. Serves him right. Unless it's Okra, and then he plants and picks. Did you know the fuzz on an okra plant itches for hours and sometimes days later? I didn't either but now I do.
Cucumbers were another challenge. We planted them on little hills and in our eagerness to live off the land (Oh, I said that already, but that eagerness caused all kinds of problems so if you work in your garden...DO NOT BE EAGER.) we planted many little hills of many little seeds of cucumbers.
They grew. And, grew (Bob Ewing quit laughing...) And, one day I caught Lynn watering them!! AFTER we had agreed to let the little plants DIE a harsh death of de-hydration!!! He has no strength and he's a COP. Can't even watch a little plant die!!! Sheesh!
Well, we couldn't give the baskets of soon to be pickles away. I tried. People dodged us on the streets and we had known them for years. SOME friends.
May they never eat a pickle again.
I had to figure out something. What to do?? My house smelled of vinegar; my hair smelled of vinegar; my skin smelled of vinegar; there was no place to run. I had no more canning jars and the budget was shot in that area. Besides, I only had to walk in the local grocery store and they'd shout out before I had even opened my mouth.. "No Marisue we don't have any more canning jars...you bought them all and we're not ordering anymore, the season is about over." Yeah? Well, tell that to the never-ending-pickle-hills.
Discouraged, I had a call from my aunt. She had found a refrigerator pickle recipe!! What Luck!! Here tis for all the little pickle lovers out there.... Not me. I hate the little devils.
Ingredients:
3 c sliced peeled cucumbers
3 c sliced peeled yellow summer squash (I won't even begin to tell you the squash stories....did you know you can't plant them near cucumbers? Something about cross pollination... HA! Someone should write a book.)
2 c chopped vadalia onions
1 1/2 c white vinegar
1 c sugar
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp celery seed
1/2 tsp mustard seed
(For Fun and Heat: Torture the little squirts with a jalapeno pepper chopped up so they swelter while they're in the cooler.)
Procedure:
Place the chopped cucumber and squash in a big bowl. In a small saucepan, combine the remaining ingred; bring to boil. Cook while stiring until the sugar is dissolved. Pour over the cucumber and squash. Cool.
Cover tightly (very tightly or everything in your refrigerator will taste like a pickle) and refrigerate for 24 - 48 hours. Dip into plastic containers and GIVE AWAY. They could multiply in your refrigerator, I don't trust these little boogers. They are the never ending story of pickle making.
Eat if you dare.
(Note: If your vegetables are fresh and tender, you can leave well scrubbed and washed peelings on for a firmer pickle.)
Pickles In The Cooler in the News
- Local pickling business keeping family tradition aliveThe San Francisco Examiner2 days ago
Cow Hollow resident Chad Brubaker created Pick-A-Peck Pickles along with his family. His pickled treats are available at Falletti Foods, Blue Fog Markets, the Inner Sunset Farmers Market and the Duboce Park Cafe. What’s a creative way to eat pickles? The asparagus and green beans are great...
- Other make-it-yourself gift ideasHerald & Review6 hours ago
Included from a variety of sources are some crafts and foodswhich can be made and given as gifts.
- Julia TomczakThe Chetek Alert2 hours ago
Julia Tomczak, 97, of Weyerhaeuser, died peacefully Thursday, Nov. 19, 2009, at Lakeview Medical Center in Rice Lake.
- Holiday Gift Idea: Canning Workshops from Happy Girl KitchenSF Weekly Blogs6 days ago
"Give a man a pickle and feed him for one day," says Happy Girl Kitchen, "teach him how to pickle and feed him and his friends for the rest of his life!"HGK is based in the Santa Cruz Moun...
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Comments
I love a garden....a garden does not love me. But, I shall endure and win this battle...and thanks for all your gardening tips as they are helping me survive as I compile my notebook of knowledge for future planting... Let's see, asparagus, rag mop is not the top, it IS the roots. hmmm
This is pretty-derned funny! And, I'm going to actually TRY this recipe. If the salt makes me have a heart attack, who do I sue?
mmm, bread and butter pickles. Am I in a minority here? Maybe it's the pregnancy. Do you have an ice cream recipe to go with?
Recipe sounds good. I love a garden we only plant a small one. This year we're planting pumpkins in every space we can find. I would like to plant a pumpkin patch so kids could come and pick out their pumpkins but can't talk my husband into that just like I can't talk him into chickens.
That recipe sounds awesome. I live in Oakland, so we don't have any space at my house to garden, but I'm going to forward this to my mom. She's in Arkansas and like..a gardening queen! She'd love this. Thanks for the great recipe
That recipe sounds awesome. I live in Oakland, so we don't have any space at my house to garden, but I'm going to forward this to my mom. She's in Arkansas and like..a gardening queen! She'd love this. Thanks for the great recipe
Mother nature seems to play rather nasty tricks on us. Those things that are highly prized are the most difficult to grow and the things we can't give away seem to thrive on their own. Well it makes for a very interesting HUB anyway.
I certainly would rather read about someone else planting the asparagus upside down than be waiting for my own to grow and find I had made the same mistake.
Level1, you sue marisue. ;)
Marisue, I love your relationship with the cucumber. Much to my surprise, I see this spring that last year's cucumbers are sending up their prodigy. That's kind of amazing. Who would have thought that these tender seeds would survive a Pennsylvania winter? But, they did.
They volunteered themselves in the middle of a new perennial planting I put in this spring. Good for them. I will find a stake or pile of straw, or something for them to grow up on. They survived the winter, and they earn my respect for their ability to survive.
About planting the asparagus roots upside down. Not to worry. Books and written advice are not as effective as having a friend tell you which is up and which is down.
I loved this mariesue! This year we planted my first real vegetable garden (DH has done it all and then some, being a country boy). I brought 21 tomato plants home thinking we'd get a couple tomatoes per plant. Well, it's too late now, they're in and doing great. But I'm thinking canned tomatoes, salsa, gazpacho--he would not plant cucumbers on pain of death... now I think I have an idea why! Thanks!
I love pickles. Thanx for the fine writing and for the delish recipe. Regards, Creativita
Level1, sueme,,,,it's all in the family. hahaha=)
wannab....oh my that ice cream thot brings more memories of hand churning ice cream...another thing I timed out on and ended up with really cold milk....another hub is coming...LOL
moonlake, I have chicken stories coming maybe I should write a book...this chicken walked me to work each morning...course it was just next door, but still a chicken? waiting patiently at the door til nearly the end of day? people were talking!!!
jonno, also these can be done with purchased cucumbers...just in case your like me and haven't read a gardening book...duh...LOL
John, so true....mother nature surely has a sense of humor with me!!
Sally's Trove...those cucumbers do deserve a chance...keep me away from them and they'll probably grow well. Truly I love a garden...nothing better than seening the fruit of your labors screaming to be picked right in front of you!!! LOL
pgrundy, some men have a natural sense of what is going to be intense labor and we women, just plung straight ahead never thinking we might be out of our league. hahaah
ceatifvita....the recipe is great and i love to hate the little squirts. LOL actually i love pickels...if lynn picks them.
thank you all for reading and commenting!!!
Hah, great read and very funny. The idea of a big, scary cop being too tender-hearted to let the little plants die is awesome. He's probably a really great cop. Oh, and LOL at "never ending pickle hills."
Thanks for the laugh even if I'm too lazy to actually try the recipe you have in there too. Just not motivated to do that kind of stuff myself. It's Vlassic or nothing for me I guess. lol.
Hi Shades...Ain't nuttin' wrong with Vlassic's and they don't have to be planted! Personally, even tho' I love the garden...I've stopped at the fruit stand many times and taken home a basket of something to can or freeze or cook. It's all good! Thanks for the read and enjoying!!!
Very funny! Been there done that but I am no longer a gardener. I will watch and enjoy the garden and may even make the pickles (thanks for he recipe). But mother nature and I seem to have opposing wills or perhaps my thumbs are not green enough. PS would it be true to say no one will sue because you are marisue? and any way you have a cop in a pickle?
sixtyorso, My Cop is Definitely in a pickle!! He's married to me!! and the sue in Marisue keeps me in "suit." LOL We are on a "roll" as are pickles... hahaha
thanks for reading !! you tickled my humor..
This is a funny story...I am a city girl from Atlanta, so I can't relate, but I have a daughter that loves pickles, so I think I will go to the store and pick up all the ingredients and make her some pickles...she will love them!
Cucumbers must be a lot like zucchini - they grow and grow - you think they will never stop. Friends and coworkers turn and run the other way when they see you as they know you are going to want to give them some more squash.
They seem to take on lives of their own...and people run cuz they know it's work!!
Funny Hub - and Karen's comment is so true!! My grandmother used to have a 1/4 acre vegetable garden. Each and everytime we saw her, she would bring about 8 zucchinis! The only way I would eat them is in zucchini bread. Yuck. Now I do like pickles, but I think even I would be put off by the cucumbers in your garden Marisue. All the best to you - and thanks for sharing some good recipes here.
I love this story! Only you could make pickles so entertaining! :) I am not a gardener myself. I love the whole idea of it, but I am consistently unsuccessful. I could not grow a single cucumber.
Steph...
Gardening and life in general provides us with great comedy material!! Thanks for reading and enjoying!
amy Jane....Thank you for liking this!! I am a comical gardener indeed but there is something magnetic about dirt....it draws me in!! LOL
Bob Ewing says:
2 years ago
Thanks for the laugh and the recipe and for sharing your gardening adventures.