Positive, positive, positive... Does anyone else get tired of hearing this and wondering if this is just a fad or is there value in this? We hear about positive thinking and now positive psychology. What is this and how can we apply this to our lives? Is this superficially looking through rose colored glasses or can this genuinely be accomplished? On a quest to learn how to incorporate this into my life, I stumbled upon it accidentally and surprisingly successfully through a little experiment with one of my students.

I teach private music lessons on a variety of instruments and I'm always fascinated with the human mind and how we learn. One of my dear adult students has been mentally blocked for a long time. She is unable to play certain notes. This is not due to lack of ability, but of fear. She expects not to be able to play certain notes on her instrument before she's even read the notes on the page. She's telling herself all kinds of negative messages like "Don't mess up," "You can never play high notes," and "I'll never be good at this." Guess what happens? She stays stuck in the same place and never improves in areas she would like to improve in.

Three weeks ago I had my student play a short passage with me and then I asked her, "What did you like about what you just played?". She didn't say anything for a moment and then pointed out three things she didn't like. Again I asked the question, "But what did you like about what you just played?". I had to do this several times before I could get her to think of one small thing she liked. Then, I simply told her that we will play the same passage again and do more of what she liked. Now her mind is focused in the right direction.

To her surprise, the passage sounded remarkably better. We continued to point out more things we liked and practiced simply "doing more of it" with amazing results! She is now able to play notes she was unable to play before with exquisite tone and grace. Her assignment was to keep practicing this principle all week. I told her that if she keeps it up, she will improve to the point that someone will notice the change and compliment her on it.

Two days ago, my student told me that a person playing in her band heard her play and asked what she had been doing differently. They noticed the change in her playing and wondered what her secret was to improve their own playing! What a fantastic feat indeed! We have decided to continue in this direction and we are currently making more efforts to stump all the people that told me privately to give up on her as a student. They said, "She just doesn't have the ability and she will always sound horrible unless she finally realizes that music is just not for her." Lies, lies, lies.... Never give up. Just do something different.

You see, If we always focus on what's not going well, we will get stuck and keep doing more of what we don't want. I have been this person and now I am climbing out of the numbing paralysis negative thinking can put us in. No matter how poorly you think you are doing at something, stop and find one small thing within it that you are doing well.  Now all you have to do is go and do more of it. You'll find that all the things you didn't like before will fall into place on their own with great results. You will begin to enjoy the journey and the process while you are getting to your desired end result.

If you keep practicing this simple idea, you may have your own personal breakthrough in multiple areas of your life. I am now currently using this technique with 3 other adult students and I am seeing more positive breakthroughs.  I am now convinced that we tend to do more of whatever we are thinking about, positive or negative.  I would love to hear how you are using this technique and the results you are noticing. 

Now, here's your assignment: Think of one thing you are doing well and simply do more of it!