President announcement

Now before anyone gets too excited let me say this the following is not an actual announcement. It started out as a parody of the political season so far when one of my coworkers suggested I actually make it into an actual column, so here you go what an announcement from Jim Montana would look like, who knows it might be the framework for a 2012 run you never know.

With all of the talk lately about who can bring the most change to America, I thought it would be a novel idea to try my hand at the political machine. So let me start by saying that I am pleased to announce my candidacy for the office of President of the United States. Now I know many of you out here are saying that I waited too long to make the decision, well you know these decisions are not easy to make, I had to sit down and discuss this with my cat. Next I would like to announce that I will be running on a completely terror based platform; we have to make sure the terrorist do not win. Some will say that I am too young or ask what qualifies me for the office; to them I say that my record speaks for itself. Due to a lack of funds I will only be campaigning in the states of Tennessee and Montana, I feel that with those two states I can easily win the nomination, who needs South Carolina, Iowa or New Hampshire I will have Tennessee and Montana. If my two state strategy fails then I will just stay in the race and refuse to realize that the dream is in fact over no offense Dennis Kucinich, Duncan Hunter or my close friend Alan Keyes. As far as to which party I am running for I will be running as a liberal conservative, I will stay away from dirty ads towards my fellow candidates, the American People care about the issues not who can sling the most mud. I am running as the candidate for the American people, one that can restore their trust in the country they love, I will restore our image in the international community and bring dignity back to the office of President. As far as the issues go this I where I stand on the issues immigration there needs to be zero tolerance for any person who sneaks into our country illegally, there does not need to be amnesty cities for these offenders. If you want to be a citizen of this country then you follow the rules in place to become a naturalized citizen, and most important of all learn to speak English. it is our language I should not have to get a translator just to tell me how to assemble a computer desk because the instructions are in every language but English. Healthcare let me start by saying that the state of our healthcare system is in shambles. There needs to be healthcare for everyone, I propose that every person have a portion of their paycheck go toward a personal fund to pay for their healthcare.

Iraq War we need to bring the war that has went on too long to a end and the only real way to do this and not make a complete

Catastrophe out of it is to have a gradual reduction in troop levels. Within my first six months, I would reduce the number of troops by ten thousand and do the same every six months thereafter. That would be option one the other would be to pull all non essential personal out except for the basic need to protect the embassy over there. Bottom line is something needs to be done and done soon. Economy well it is no big secret that the economy is in the toilet and we have the previous administration to blame for that. The first thing that needs to happen is we need to cut spending on the war in Iraq with us reducing troop levels that can be accomplished without sacrificing any of our troops. Next we need to stimulate the job market. Another one of the issues that voters care about this election year is gay marriage. I do not support a amendment to the constitution banning same sex marriage instead I feel that if two people truly love each other then they should have the right to marry. This is not a subject that the government needs to get involved in it should be left up to the voters of the individual states to decide.you know this whole Presidential campaign stuff seems pretty easy all I need is several million dollars and keep saying the same thing each and every time without variance and I am a shoe in. And while all of the news has been about the top tier candidates never count out the underdog to come from nowhere and win it all. I decided to run because the American people are tired of the Washington politics and have lost faith in their government. It’s time for a person who is not owned by Washington lobbyist to speak up for the American people, and implement policies that benefit the great people of this country.

So there you have it my mock Presidential announcement. Many out there will probably label me sort of name that they spell wrong, to those people I say this in advance I’m sorry if you are offended.