Raising Bilingual Children

Anyone who has ever dappled with the idea of trying to raise a child who is bilingual has probably heard the well-meaning concerns of family, friends, even strangers. I sure have. When we were pregnant with our daughter, who is now 3 1/2 going on 12, I decided we should try to raise her speaking both English and German. When we told others our plan, and especially as we began to implement it, we were often discouraged by the comments others made. Some of the things we heard:

1. You aren't a native German speaker; you can't really expect to teach her German

2. Your plan of action isn't consistent enough - if she hears you speak English or your husband German, she won't be able to understand and she'll end up confused.

3. She will be way behind other children her age in speech and in comprehension

4. Why don't you just wait until she's older - after she's perfected her English?

5. She's going to think she's better than others because she knows two languages; We might not even be able to talk to her and she's our granddaughter/neice/cousin/etc! You're not being fair!

Because of these concerns, we spent a lot of time worrying about whether or not we were doing the right thing. I also spent time trying to find articles and research from experts that might convince the others that we were not doing permanent damage to our daughter and that she might, indeed, benefit from our efforts. One of my favorite discoveries was the Multilingual Children's Association (http://www.multilingualchildren.org/). I really recommend the FAQs section and "Tips & Tools", but the whole site is a breath of fresh air. You can find an answer to pretty much any question you have about raising your bilingual child. It's fabulous! My myths dispelled:

1. I have grown confident in my ability as a non-native speaker. Although I am better when I am around other German-speakers, I am still rather fluent and have found that as I work with my daughter, I look things up or find examples for things I am not sure about.

2. My husband is trying to learn German through this process as well, and although we try to speak mostly one language (I speak German, he speaks English), sometimes he speaks some phrases in German and I often speak in English when we are around other people (I still speak German directly to her though). She is talkative and happy and not at all confused! She compartmentalizes the languages and can easily "shift" or translate from one to the other. I think the key is that we have been fairly consistent with our language speaking.

3. My daughter, who I personally think is the greatest thing since sliced bread, is up to speed with other kids her age. She speaks more German than English right now, and she is starting to use her alphabet to sound out words, but only in German. Because she is three, I am focusing on the German right now because I know she will learn the English no matter what. When I compare her to others her age (what they are saying/doing in English and what she's saying/doing in German and English), she is performing at the same level as her playmates.

4. I think that if I had waited until she was older, it would not have happened. I think it would be mostly because I would be in a comfortable spot with English and would have to basically "teach" her the German. With just speaking it at home from the day she was born, it is a comfortable part of her life and our family life.

5. For a while, it was a little difficult around family members. She understood English, but refused to speak it. When she really started speaking (around 14 months), she would only say "dog" in English. Everything else was German. That only lasted about 5-6 months. Now that she has consistent interaction with other kids her age that don't speak German, she communicates in English as well. Sometimes I am surprised at the phrases/songs she knows in English that I know I didn't teach her! :)

The moral: If you have a desire to raise your child bilingually, don't give up because of what others say! These are only a few of the myths that I have personally found to be untrue!