I puffed some smoke into thin air. Deep in thought, I contemplated whether I should go or stay. “What the H!” I finally said, “ I’d like to wear my heels just for tonight.” I was born in the sign of a horse. I am the life of the party. The salt of the earth. I am the elegant horse. I have decided that the girl is going to have fun tonight or I will die pretty soon being prim and proper. I have to get out of my skin for a while and inhale the oxygen that I call life.

I needed to be with people with the same wavelength. So I’ve been. I drink ‘till I got drunk. I danced ‘till my muscle hurt (correction: I grinded). I watched a woman grinded in front of me and appreciate the way her body moved to the music. I stole a kiss from a guy who dances salsa to an R n B beat. (Nevermind that, he was sexiest among the male species). And all the rest was done half-consciously.

I saw the sun smile at me when I headed home. And finally...a frown. I fell asleep in my bed for an hour and headed for work. Vaguely, I remember some of the things that I did and I found myself laughing. I hate and love myself altogether. I am extreme and it is a good reason to laugh and regret at the same time. I have never known anyone as interesting as myself for I have never known anyone as much as I know myself. LOL. Call it self-love, I don’t care. I do not write to praise myself or to give others pleasure. I write because I want to. It is the same in all aspect, I do things because I feel like doing it.

Finally, I am sober now. Woe is me. I felt sad when I think about what other people must have thought of me. But I didn’t want a trade, I liked what happened the way it happened. I didn’t want to change a thing because I thoroughly enjoyed everything. I was alive. I was revitalized. I can go back to my own skin now and feel like I never miss out on anything.

And to the Salsa guy, I really had fun harassing you. (LOL) I hope the sorry food that I brought you is enough to tell you that I want to do it all over again. (LOL again) I meant to say, it won’t happen again.

Whew! I am desperately in love with myself and my life.