I am writing this mainly to convince myself. My toddler will not eat (except for big bags of fried food - remember?). I have talked about this before, but I am still about at my wits end. It is so stressful to feed him and I know that is not healthy for him or me.

I have talked to so many people, including about 8 pediatricians, and read a ton of books. Everyone basically says the same thing. It is okay, they will eat when they are hungry and they aren't going to starve to death. They also say, don't give in and give them the snacks because then they will never learn to eat the good stuff. I do believe that - totally - but when your child is absolutely refusing to eat anything other than "Pirate Booty" it is hard to not give it to them. The thought of them going to bed hungry just rips at the soul and the "Pirate Booty" has been winning.

I am going to post a list of tips I found in a great book - "The Healthy Baby Meal Planner" and added my 2 cents for what it is worth. Annabel Karmel has a lot of excellent ideas that I have been trying. Some are working, some are not, but I am going to keep trying and keep convincing myself that he will eat when he is hungry. More of us should follow that ----- eating only when hungry really! Here is the list. I hope it helps.

• Let the child feed him or her self. They like the feeling of independence. What you need to get over is the potential mess. Get over it. Breath. Put a big plastic mat under the high chair and over all furniture around if you have to!!!
• Let your child use untensils. It is new and exciting for them. They want to be like you and their older siblings. They will be challenged and intrigued and potentially able to get a bit a food in their mouths!!
• Eat with your child and let them try foods off of your plate (as long as it is something they can eat and not choke on). Isn't everything better when it is someone elses? Of course it is.
• Change up where your child eats his meals. If you have a little table or blanket you can put outside in the yard, make a picnic out of it and eat with him out there. It adds fun and adventure to the meal.
• Let them have a "party" and invite their stuffed animals, adventure heros and trains to lunch with them. They can all sit around the table and enjoy their lunch. Your child will probably try to feed his friends and then feed himself.
• Make their food colorful and bright. If it is more appealing to the eye, he just may be more apt to try it.
• If old enough, let your child help you prepare the food, stir it, pour it, crack it, peel it, etc. If they help with it it gives them a sense of ownership and they may be more interested in eating it.
• Let them play with their food. BREATHE ---- This is my toughest one. I cannot stand when kids play with their food. I literally have to look away and pretend it is not happening. BUT - they must experiment, get a feel for it (literally) and just thoroughly check it all out. Once the fun is over, they just may be hungry enough to eat it!
• Make shapes and fun patterns out of the food and use silly names for the food. Broccoli in our house is always called "trees". Not that that is silly but it works. I always make Mickey Mouse pancakes and use cookie cutters for the grilled cheese. Again this makes the food fun and the child may be more interested in eating it.
• Don't load up their plate with too many options. It may seem overwhelming to them and completly turn them off. Give them one or two things and see how it goes. If after offering them a couple of things and they still are not interested, just close up meal time and try again later. Don't keep offering them one thing after another. That teaches them that they run the show and it just gets to be too overwhelming for both of you. Besides, you don't want to have to cook 4 different meals for all 4 different members of your family do you?? I didn't think so!!
• Take them to a restaurant or a friends house for dinner. Many times if their friends are eating, they will too! Peer pressure starts at a very young age! Plus like before, sometimes new scenery just helps.

I hope this helps. Just remember to breath and that your child will not starve to death. Children will be children and many times they are just not interested in eating. Life is so exciting for them and they just don't have time to worry about food. They need to figure out how they can mess up the remote the best, call 15 people on your cell phone, pull every single pan out of the cupboard before you get there, and squeeze the cat as hard as they can without getting bit. With that list, who has time to eat!

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