Sexting: What is it and Should I Be Concerned
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Sexting
Sexting - Common Between Teens
Sexting - Naked Photo Sharing
Do you have a teen or teens?
Do they have a cell phone?
A cell phone with a camera?
Do they love to text? Do they have a MySpace or a Facebook account?
If you answered yes to any or all of these questions; BEWARE!!!
In this new day and age there are many things that we as parents should be aware of. Most are familiar with the horrors of the computer age. There are the online predators that we try and protect our children from, keeping an eye on their MySpace and Facebook accounts so that they do not give out too much information. There are the pornography sites that come out of nowhere, even when you are trying to help your second grader find information on crawdads. Pornography is like those dastardly weeds in your garden, easy to find and hard to control. With so much information and the world at your fingertips there is a great deal that can happen on the world wide web especially since there is not a great deal of policing of the Internet going on. Add to that the cell phone with cameras which almost every teen has and it can spell disaster. With cell phones and computers it has become seamless to send pictures from phone to computer and from phone to phone or computer to computer and to that the ability to text back and forth between cell phones and even computers and it’s a whole new interaction. Cell phones and computers have opened up a whole new way of relating for that next generation, a generation that is now taking texting and sending pictures to that next level with sexting.
WHAT IS SEXTING? Sexting is basically flirting on the cell phone it involves sexy texting as well as risqué photos, photos in which teens and young adults are either totally or semi-nude. In a recent study which was commissioned by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy and CosmoGirl.com, 22 percent of teenage girls and 18 percent of teenage boys have taken nude or semi nude photos of themselves and have either sent them to someone via cell phone or posted them online. These pictures are usually taken with a camera phone and passed from phone to phone and/or from phone to computer. This form of digital flirting as teens call it has some serious repercussions as well. How far the sexting will go is up to the teen and young adult and whether it will lead to more in face-to-face contact is still unknown.
SHOULD WE BE CONCERNED? Yes we should be very concerned about sexting. It’s a new thing and it’s a trend. And the repercussions from their actions could be irreversible. Although it’s only sending pictures to other cell phones and to the computer those pictures in the wrong hands or in the hands of an angry ex could be detrimental. What teens do not understand are the repercussions from sending and posting these pictures. Posting nude and semi-nude pictures in social groups such as MySpace and Facebook could be seen by anyone who has access to these groups. This could be negative if an employer or college takes a look at the site to get more information on the perspective student/employee. And that is just what colleges and employers have been doing. Even if the pages are set to private there is still the possibility that these pictures could be released in the mainstream. If you have friends on your pages that copy your pictures they can send them anyway and in no time they can be around the Internet. The same thing can happen with cell phones because pictures can be easily shared from cell phone to cell phone and can get around a school in a matter of minutes. So trusting friends to keep those pictures private and between the two of you is not always the situation. In addition to what can happen when the pictures get into the wrong hands is how these teens are perceived by the people who receive and see the pictures that they have sent. Is there a stigma attached to that person that says if they are willing to do this online or over the phone then they must take it further offline or in real time? This might be the case only time will tell. But being considered promiscuous because of these actions can lead to further problems as well especially if sending a sext is misconstrued by he receiver.
What can you do to avoid this with your teenager?
- Talk to them – Talking is important make sure that they understand the full scope of what they are doing and the possible repercussions from their actions. Although it might seem like fun at the time it could get out of hand and they need to understand this completely.
- Monitor them – They are still teenagers and as such should have their MySpace and Facebook pages monitored, make sure that their pages are private and that the pictures they have up are not risqué, it only takes one person to pass that picture on for this situation to go in a bad direction.
- Listen to them – Understand what they think about sexting, texting and flirting. This is a new day and age and something that parents are not necessarily able to relate to because they did not experience this as teens. Try to understand how they feel what they think and where they are coming from.
These few steps can help build a better relationship which can only lead to positive situations. So now you can add sexting to your list of things to talk with your teen about along with drugs, smoking and sex. Sexting is the newest thing with teens and young adults and as a parent you should be concerned enough to learn more about, understand it and make sure your teen understands all aspects of it as well.
Sexting: What is it and Should I Be Concerned in the News
- Sexting-related bullying cited in Hillsborough teen's suicideSt. Petersburg Times5 days ago
Hope Witsell, 13, sent a boy a nude photo of herself on a cell phone. Student harassment followed, then her suicide.
- Police chief: Woods' wife used golf club to free him after accidentNew York Post5 days ago
Tiger Woods was knocked unconscious and his face was cut up in a bizarre car crash early yesterday morning near the driveway of his Orlando mansion — and he had to be rescued by his golf club-swinging model wife, police said. Elin Nordegren had heard...
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Comments
Lynn thank you very much for your comments. Yes we have to be involved in our children's lives this is so true. The repercussions for these actions are irreversible and that is what makes it very scary. Thanks again
this is just something we teens like to do its our decision and if we want to do it then we should be able to
Jordan, thank you for your comments. I have to disagree with you a bit. Because as a teen you are under age and under the care of your parents I do not think that you should be able to do anything simply because you like it. There are repercussions of any actions and understanding that is truly important.
great hub - detailed and non-hysterical.
Thanks LondonGirl, I actually find it quite eye opening so felt it important to get the word out.
Yet another reason to be proud of the fact that I've never once sent a text message. Kids these days. Thanks for the info.
Yes stay away from the texting. It becomes addicting and causes a great deal of problems. I am amazed though so many people do it. Thats cool that you have not.
My 14 year old son was suspended from school today for this "sexting". His "girlfriend" was sending him text messages while they were in class and the teacher heard the phone signal and took up his phone. She went thru the messages and discovered several NUDE and close up pics of the girlfriend. Since the cell phone is in my name and my account I could be charged for Child pornography!! I am extremely upset by this
Misty I am sorry to hear that. I had never even thought about that aspect of it. Most cell phones are in the parents name and that makes it a completely different situation legally. I hope it works out for you.
Triplet Mom, THANK YOU for getting this out there. I couldn't agree with you more. After doing "Passport to Purity" with my daughter, she told me the most powerful visual she took from it was the first, when we took clean water and mixed just a tiny amount of soil into it. She realized when I proved to her that there was no way to get that water clear again, EXACTLY what I was trying to say. We can't take the filth back out of their brains once they've been exposed--accidentally or otherwise. You're doing everyone a great service by posting this.!!
And jordan, Triplet mom is exactly right in her response to you. I know right now you think you know everything you need to take care of yourself successfully, but at your age, you've got a bit more maturing to do. Better to do it under the watchful eyes of your parents where they can catch you when you fall than to jump without a net.
Thank you Proud Mom. I think it is easy for children and young adults to get caught up in the moment without looking forward. I remember being the same way. That is why we as parent have to be able to show them what is ahead or the possible outcomes; negative and positive of any situation. Sounds like you gave your daughter a real eye opener and that is great.
You can buy monitoring devices at www.spyparent.net to prevent sexting. They sale SIM card reader that allow your capture deleted text messages and photos.
Thank you Sedgrid that is really good information.
Nice article, I just published one similar to your...with my spin on it of coarse. Check it out if you get a chance.
Thank you Adam, I will give it a look and see. I just recently heard of a girl who committed suicide after her pictures were sent around to everyone by her ex boyfriend.
Im 63 Year old grandmother with a 13 & 14 year old grandsons reading this article brings a lot to light about Sexting I made a copy of this and I
will share it with my friends very informative
Eve - Thank you, I really do think it is important to bring this to light!!
Good article
This is so true.I watched a show on telly last night about couples who text their saucy pics to each other, and guess how many have ended up on the internet. Beware.!!!
BP - Since posting this hub I have heard two very frightening stories. One was a young girl who killed herself because her boyfriend sent her pic to everyone once they broke up and she was being ridiculed. And the second is a young man who had to register as a sex offender because he had pics on his phone of his naked girlfriend. He was 18 she was 16. Just scary stuff. Better to not take the pics.
i feel we as teens should b able to do wat we want. no all the time but mostly. ITS OUR PHONE.! if we get in2 trouble for it then dhats on us. i feel its our fone. n our situation... mahny ppl try to fix thangs by sayin we should do this n dhat. we really yall makin dha problem even worst. if somebody thinks about sendin a nude photo to sumone thats their choice. they should kno. we as teens have to grow up. but we cant we adults dwn our bak.!
Closemouth - Of course you feel that way because you are a teen. But when you do things the repercussions usually falls on the adults who care for you. So until you are of age we adults will make the decisions. Yes it is your phone but who pays the bill? Who got you that phone? The parent/adult of course.
sorry for mii misspelled words.! but um i still think its crazy! for the reason. im doin mii senior exit project on this. n to b honest i neva knew this topic was n dha world.! but yall "adults" have to understand that this is freedom of speech we should b able to send a pix if we want. most ppl dhat do dhat should kno wats up wen dhay do
Close mouth - Thanks for your comments. I am all about freedom of speech. However there is such a thing as pornography and there are age limits. Sending pictures of naked teens is first and foremost illegal. So something that might be considered private between two people can end up being public with the push of a button. Once that picture gets sent around then it becomes pornography especially if the person is under age. So its not as simple as letting people do what they do. This of course all changes when you exit your teen years and become of age.
thanx.! like i told u this topic is for mii exit project. i was diagreein to get more information. mii topic is the effect of sextin n how it hurts teenage kids.! thanx for wat u gave me u really hit dha spot.!
? will i b able to copy n paste the argeement we just had. to mii paper?? leavin everythang u said n it.!
That is fine with me as long as you make sure that cite the source. Thanks for the discussion.
i totally agree wth yu triplet mom, but what if we flirt while texting and we r just playing around?
Basketball Lover - I like basketball too!! I do not see a problem with flirting. I only have a problem with suggestive photos. It just gets into dangerous territory when a picture is sent through cell phones or emails.
=] , yes i understand your point. i try to look at it from both points of views, and i agree when you say teens should not be able to do these things and after all there parents r the 1s paying the bills, and too much can happen, like 2 many consequences . im trying to forsee these things because i am only 14
I think it's a bit much to have our pages monitored. Here in Aus the legal age for sex is 16, and I'm 16.5..... so to have our pages monitored feels like a breach of trust. Mum's first primal reaction to anything bad is to get angry. This makes me scared, so I'd rather not tell her. Though I'm learning to become alot more open, so I believe giving on BOTH sides helps. If the teen does not want to talk about it, they shouldn't until they're ready. The parent should give them a few important points to consider, and make a time when they can prepare and talk about it. I know myself that I become flustered and I don't know what to say when Mum springs a talk on me. Being a teen, we don't tend to want to have a talk twice, so we don't ever say what we think of later...
Sexting really isn't that big of a deal really... It IS something we do... Yes it would be great to meet some of the people I text, but to me, I think I would rather keep it as a virtual relationship. I'm not sure why, but I just think it would be weird.... If I did want to meet any of my virtual friends (some only live a few hours away) I would let my mum know, and meet at a neutral place, definately not my house. Alot of the time, we say we'd love to meet, but really... It's talk that to me, I'd rarely want to follow through with....
Hope that let you enter into a teen's world a little ^_^
Kelly - Thank you for your insight. My problem is not with texting as much as it is with the sexting part and sending pictures of a sexual nature. This can lead to very serious consequences. Also meeting someone new especially when you are young and from online or through text can be a very serious endeavor. I have been a teen and am now a parent so I can see things from both sides. As a parent we have to protect our children and sometimes teens do not make the best decisions and do not think about the possible consequences.
lynn says:
11 months ago
This is great and very informative. As parents we are responsible for our children. That means it is our business to know what they are doing. But we must teach our children to respect their bodies. And they are not a piece of meat. And there are consequences for all of our actions whether good or bad. Sexting should not be taken lightly. Once something is put into cyberspace it is there forever. And things have a way of coming back to haunt those who have participated in these kind of things.