You wonder?

Is he? Is She? Affair, yes? Affair, No?

Perhaps you want to know...for certain. Are these truly signs of an affair? You want to alleviate the fears, questions and growing suspicion.

Perhaps you don't want to know. You don't want to think about these rather strange behaviors as being signs of an affair. You certainly would rather not entertain the thought that your spouse/partner is cheating on you. Don't want to go there.

However, you know it is best to not bury your head in the sand. It is best to be aware, be vigilant and confront your partner/spouse with your suspicions. The elephant in the room needs to be addressed for the sake of the health of the relationship.

So, what are some signs of infidelity that may draw your attention?

1. The patterns of the frequency of your sexual activity change. Maybe you have it more. Maybe you have it less.

2. The nature of your sexual activity may change. Suddenly, s/he may become interested in different positions or different techniques. You may think this is good, but wonder why all of sudden this emerged.

3. This one is obvious: becomes more concerned about his/her physical appearance. May join a health club, take up running, lift weights, become diet conscious. etc.

4. May perm his hair and buy a red sports car. (a common mid-life crisis joke which had validity some years ago).

5. Suddenly shows an interest in different styles, tastes related to food, music, dress, etc.

6. You go to his/her place of work and get stares, the cold shoulder, or uncomfortable encounters from those with whom s/he works.

7. Spends more and more time online or checking email. And, when you walk into the room, s/he quickly closes out the page. May change usernames and passwords.

8. May be on the computer late at night, after you are in bed.

9. S/he has a different smell about him/her.

10. Gags on food your prepared for dinner, since s/he just had dinner with his/her lover.

11. You wonder where all the money is going. You, the family seem to be shorted and there is no explanation.

12. You find socks, underwear, ear ring, etc. that doesn't belong to you. You wonder....

13. You often find him/her staring into space.

14. You get more calls where the person hangs up.

15. S/he gets more calls where s/he suddenly hangs up saying it's the wrong number.

16. His/her attitude around the house changes - to the children, to you - and you see a diminished interest in caring for the house/family.

17. She sleeps with her purse next to the night stand.

18. S/he sleeps with his/her cell phone under his/her pillow.

19. S/he goes to run a quick errand and arrives home 3 hours later.

20. Sneaky... real sneaky.

21. You no longer talk about the concerns or items that you once did. There seems to be no interest in the things that were once of interest.

22. Deleting all calls from the caller ID.

23. May ask you if you are having an affair.

24. Becomes accusatory, edgy.

25. Wants to help with the laundry more so than in the past.

25. Wondering what the signs of affair are in the first place.

Please know that this list is not exhaustive.

As well, Signs of affairs are often related to the specific kind of affair facing you. I outline 7 kinds of affairs in other places. Please consider tracking them down, so you might be able to correlate the kind of affair with the signs of an affair characteristic of that particular type.