Ten Signs of a Bad Relationship

There are a myriad of ways to tell when a you are in a bad relationship. Ten Ways You are in a Bad Relationship will address the ones that are general in most relationships.When both people in the relationship recognize that the relationship is bad, then the healing of hurt feelings and forgiveness can begin.

Ten Signs of a Bad Relationship

1. Your spouse is not letting you know where his or her paycheck is going but you are seeing lottery stubs in jacket pockets when you do the laundry. Also telemarketers  are starting to call trying to sell you settlement programs and letting you know that your bills are past due. Either you confront your husband, wife or partner or wait until a matter occurs about the calls and the lack of money to pay the bill. Rebecca Harris, relationship expert says that finances is the number one reason when relationships begin to be troubling to partners. There is trouble brewing because a matter of trust has been broken if you both had agreed not to gamble and to pay the bills on time. Withholding secretive information about a trip to the store to buy the lottery tickets and especially the ignoring of the billis is a sure sign the relationship is bad. So the number one reason a relationship goes bad is financial.

2. The "thrill is gone." The intimacy in your marriage is no longer there and you do not think twice about sleeping in separate rooms. Basically avoiding each other especially in the intimate and bonding area is a sign that the relationship is in trouble. When you both forget the argueing and do have a relationship together, you wonder what was the use. You may almost feel like a prostitute because of the distance of your love somewhere other than the partner who is snoring beside you. Bonding sexually is an important part of marriage even as the relationship matures because it lets the partners know that they 're there for each other's pleasures. Moreoften than not, afterwards conversation that is near and dear to both of you can be discussed. But when the "thrill is gone" and trouble awaits instead, it is time to take a good look at the future of the relationship.

3. The relationship is bad when the talking stops between the both of you. When you are no longer sharing your thoughts and ideas with your partner, then how is he or she going to know what is on your mind. Men says that women talks too much but women know when to stop the communication if what she is saying does not land on listening ears. The lines of communcation has to stay open so that the relationship can continue to grow. A communication void means that no one is talking to each other so basically there is no real relationship between the two of you.

4. The husband or wife throws themselves into their jobs and do not spend time together. Hard work is okay and in this economy it is good to have a job but working overtime to avoid coming home is another story. Most people when things are not going well at home tries to be anywhere except in the house at the same time as the other. If the partner just comes home and shower and shave and then gets up and is out of the door before you get up, then something needs to be done to curtail him or her avoiding you. Sometimes there is someone at work who has taken his attention away from family and home. But a lot of working outside of the home especially when it is not the norm is a sign that the relationship is bad.

5. He or she stops acknowledging your birthday or anniversary and those times of the year used to ones of celebration. He may make an excuse the first year of masked forgetfulness but when the ignoring of those days become a habit then you know that he is not your main focus. Also if he does remember these days and do not put in the effort that he normally does, then your relationship may be getting bad.

6. Lies, Lies and more Lies. If you caught you partner in a lie about something that was important to you, then that is a sign that your marriage is in trouble. Lying and cheating goes hand in hand so now is the time to take out all of your evidence that you have found around the house signifying that he is seeing someone other than you. Crumbled up pieces of papers with telephone numbers and condom packages do not belong to his friend. Those pieces of evidence belong to him and now is the time to start talking. He will deny accusations because of every human being right to defend himself but that does not mean that you have to take it. See if he can handle the truth that you will not accept him seeing another woman. Lying and cheating is a sign that the relationship is bad.

7. You have began dreaming about other men because you do not love your partner anymore. In fact, you may have flirted just to see if you should have to leave the "loser"  and whether you still got it together to be attractive. You haven't acted on it because you are not ready for another relationship but you just want to be able to think of greener pastures as some crazy release from the circumstances that you find yourself in. The reason for the relationship being bad may not be coming from the other party, you may be initiating actions towards a better relationship with someone else..

8. You would rather go to the movies and spend time with family and friends than to spend time with your partner. The reasons can be far reaching depending on the relationship and how you have been treated. If you have been humiliated or belittled, then you may want to get away from the husband ,wife, boyfriend or partnerr and be with people who are supportive and who builds you up instead of breaking you down. The relationship is bad when you just don't want to be with him or her anymore.

9. Arguments are the plan of the day from the time you are both in the apartment or house or until you both go to work. You forget what the disagreement is about but for some reason, you want to win the argument. You want to be able to say that in all the yelling and screaming that your point was heard and that you were the winner of the round. Disagreements are expected in a relationship, but when an argument develops almost daily over trivia stuff, then the relationship is bad. The both of you are not arguing just to make up, you both are aruging to win. No one wins in an argument with both people raising their voices. No one can hear you if the decibels are higher than Mariah Carey's highest notes. Peace should be sought in such a relationship and since you both are at least speaking to each other, counseling may save this bad relationship.

10. If the word divorce has come up in your marriage either in one of the argument or as a way out of a bad situation, then the marriage is definitely a bad one. Some couples vow to never say the"D" word during their relationship but after awhile it seems as though divorce has made a place at the dinner table. There are no if or ands about it, the relationship is headed in that direction. There is not talk about vacation or cruises or of being together but of the dreaded "D" word. Once that idea enters the conversation, the person who uses it the most is the winner of this round because more than likely that is the person most dissatisfied with the relationship. Depending on the bargaining skills of the partner, which is usually the man in the relationship, the woman may give him another chance. But if the man has made the decision, then he will probably be off to Vegas and back with the divorce papers and a "chow" or a "see ya." Before the divorce solution crop up about crappy situations seek professional  counselor and see if the relationship can be saved.