10 Common But Terrible Reasons to Relinquish a Pet
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Ask any domestic animal rescuer in the world. For far too many people, it seems, a pet is just a disposable object, deserving only as much love as we have the attention span to give.
Every day, I see advertisements for people "rehoming" their pets with various excuses. There's always an excuse, but it never seems to be a good one. Here's the top ten that I hear, in no particular order.
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The Big Ten
1. I'm moving. Unless you are moving to the Sun, chances are your pets would rather go with you than be shuffled from home to home. There is pet-friendly housing everywhere, and what with the marvel of modern technology and all, it's possible to transport your pet everywhere. Even if a building says "no dogs" in its policy, it's possible they'd be willing to bend the rules if you pay a pet deposit or if the owners met your dog. There is almost always a way.
2. The landlord said no pets. Then why did you get one? Before adopting a pet, you need to always ensure that it is within your rental agreement (if you don't own). You should have never given this animal the hope that it would be loved forever if you knew that you couldn't keep it.
3. The animal doesn't get along with my other pets or my kids. Did you properly introduce them? Teach your children proper behavior around their new family member? Is there a safe escape spot for each pet in the household? Did you work with a trainer or behaviorist to iron out behavioral issues? If you did all of these things, your animals and kids would all get along fine. Millions of other families are doing it; why can't you work it out?
4. She's peeing all over the house and chewed the furniture. My husband says she's got to go! Did you even try to housebreak this animal? Or did you expect her to come into your home knowing exactly how you would like her to behave? Animals do not inherently understand human standards; they have to be taught. Almost no pet cannot be housetrained in one way or another. Become an educated pet owner before surrendering your pet for a silly reason!
5. We just don't have the time to love him as much as he deserves. Does he deserve to be euthanized in a shelter after no one has adopted him in 7 to 30 days (if not less)? Even if you get home late a few nights a week, your pet wants to be with you not to adjust to an entirely different household, and that's the best case scenario! There is always a way to get in a relief visit (neighborhood kids would drop in to give your dog or cat some loving for $5 a day, I bet) or two in during the long days when you can't get home.
6. I just had a baby. The cat and the kid together are too much work! A baby alone is "too much work," but that doesn't mean you give up! And if you have had this animal for years, how much of a nuisance is it to you now, really? Is it worth bearing the emotional trauma of giving up your dog when you can just "weather the storm" for a few months and come out of it a happy family? Toddlers and dogs can be pricelessly cute.
7. I'm getting divorced (or just broke up with my live-in significant other), and neither of us can take care of her anymore. How terrible that we allow human disputes to ruin the lives of our animals. There has got to be a way to keep the animal in this case, even if it means asking a family member to "foster" her for a few months until you get your life settled.
8. I got him to be a guard dog, and now he doesn't bark! First of all... what?! Second of all, did you even teach your dog that you want him to bark at strangers? Or just expect that he would? Some breeds of dog don't tend to bark a lot, and some bark like maniacs. Did you do research to figure out which breed would be best for your situation? And because your dog is not filling its role of "house alarm" you want to give it away?
9. We gave her to our kids as a present, and now they don't take care of him like they promised. Adopting a pet with the expectation that your only kids will take care of him is absurd. Do your kids make their bed every day? Offer to do the dishes? Clean the toilets and pack lunch for themselves in the morning? If you want to adopt a pet for the family, that's fine, but expect to do all the work yourself and leave the loving to your kids.
10. I have become allergic. Four words for you: Nambudripad Allergy Elimination Technique.
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Honorable Mentions
Here are a couple (I have actually seen these) that didn't make it to the top ten:
- The dog got too big.
- I need money for Christmas presents for my kids and want to recoup some of the costs for her vetting over the past year by selling her.
- The cat seems to hate men and hisses at some of my male friends.
- I'm moving back home, and my parents don't want her.
- The new puppy doesn't get along with the old cat, so we have to get rid of the cat.
- We need new furniture, and we're afraid he'll tear it up or pee on it.
- The puppy follows me all around the house, and I can't make him leave me alone.
- We wanted to breed her but found out she can't be bred.
- She knocks things over when she walks on the mantle, and we can't get her to stop.
- He needs too much exercise.
- Her food is too expensive.
- The kitten wakes me up at night.
- The puppy nipped at my eight-year-old who was trying to take his toy.
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I'll Leave You With This
We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
-M. Acklam
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Comments
How about "I just got a new puppy, and they don't get along." I've heard that one a few times. Peole get new puppies, and surrendor their older dog to a rescue. Great Hub...
Reminds me of my years volunteering with animal rescue groups. I found all the people ignorant. There were only a few good excuses- mostly military, and those were the sad stories, as they usually have no other choice.
I hated the "I'm moving into a new apartment and they don't allow pets;" FIND A DIFFERENT APARTMENT!
I've also heard, "my daughter's pregnant and she's now allergic to dander;" I mean it happens, but I'm sorry, but I wouldn't give up my dog. At least I say that now...
That is a great hub and when you see their forlorn looking faces, staring at you from the other side of the fence at the pound. Your heart is torn.
A great hub
Thank you have a great new yerar and abetter 2008.
Thank you for writing this. I agree wholeheartedly.
Yes, it is sad, and I'm guilty of this, too, before. I had to let go of our cat. It haunts me almost everyday of my life.
Thanks for commenting, Kenny. But even if you feel like you did a wrong thing, it doesn't make you a bad person! Just missing your cat and knowing that you wouldn't want to give up another animal is evidence enough that you're quite the opposite! :)
Thank you, Helena. It's guilt for having being weak then. The damage is the same, isn't it, whether you are good or bad when you are weak?
Yes, that's the last time I'll allow anyone to treat a pet as a nonperson!
I have heard many, many excuses in my years working in Veterinary hospitals. I must say that I've been on both sides of this.
First I would never give up my dog in a million years. I pay for an overpriced apartment which I can barely afford because it's pet friendly and allows me to keep my wonderful Holly. I live in a city and have to work my life around my dog. I litter trained her and made sure I got an apartment with a balcony so if I have to work a long day she can sit outside enjoying the fresh and has access to a pee spot. (My dog is a 22lb Cairn Terrier.)
On the other side. I rescued a cat that came into the hospital even though I knew I was sensitive to cat hair. However Aspen (the cat) had no where else to go. I was it, so I took her in. After a year I became extremely allergic to cats and began to try to find a new home for her. I had to quit my job because of my allergy. And although there are remedies they take a long time and I was really ill. Lucky for me (and this will sound truly strange) my husband and I decided to divorce. That meant Aspen could stay with him in a familiar environment with a person she loved while my dog came with me. That made me happy!
So while I agree wholeheartedly to 1 through 9. I have mixed feelings about number 10. Allergies can put you in the hospital and can begin spontaneously. And while there are methods to desensitize people to allergens, for some the symptoms are too severe to cope with in the mean time. It becomes a heart wrenching situation. I do not believe these animals should be dumped at a shelter however. If you choose to take in a life then you are responsible for it and that means finding a great, loving home to replace yours if it comes to that.
Great writing. :)
Thank you for your comment, RFox! Many of us go way out of our way to be able to keep our animals; this makes it that much more painful when someone else doesn't seem to be willing to even do something very simple to keep their pet!
I understand your mixed feelings about number 10, and I understand that allergies can change everything. But Nambudripad Allergy Elimination Technique has overnight cured every allergy I've seen it treat. I apologize that I hadn't linked to my hub on it yet; I've fixed that, and here it is again. http://hubpages.com/_selflink/hub/EliminateAllergi There's no need to wait a long time to build up an "immunity" or anything like that because it only takes 25 hours to take effect. It's truly miraculous.
Amen!!! Garrett (pictured here with me) agrees completely. We rescued him from the humane society last year. Thanks for writing a thought-provoking hub. Steph
Thanks for the link I will check it out!
Yes, I;m guilty of giving up my dog last year. I still cry about it and think about her a lot. Basically she was a good girl but was very dog agressive and in the year I had her the training I tried did not help.
So, one day I just took her back to a no kill shelter and she got adopted thank God to a couple. I just hope they have a yard so my baby doesnt have to interact with other dogs. I miss her and still cry but hopefully she is happy.
I used to say that I would rather live in my car than give up my dog. Until the situation above. I still would rather live in my car with my new dog than give him up because of a landloard. But dog aggression was another story altogether.
I always advocate adopting an animal. Thats what I have always done after my very first dog that I bought as a puppy.
They are all so precious.
Thanks for the comments, mam. Like I told Kenny: giving up a dog doesn't make you a bad person, especially if you feel like you did everything you could! Dealing with dog aggression can be way too much for people, but it's good that you were able to give him back to a no-kill shelter and you know that he was adopted! Thanks for sharing your story.
Great hub!
I have three dogs that I absolutely love and would NEVER give up. My husband and I and our three children moved from Florida to North Carolina and we brought our 3 Labradors with us. There was never any thought of giving them up! The van was crowded but the dogs were angels the two days it took us to drive to our new house. (Even my kids were angels! They're usually bickering with each other but they helped with the dogs on that trip.)
Pets are a part of the family and should be treated like one, not something to be thrown away.
BTW, that last photo of the black dog with his paws on the fence looks just like my Star!
Thanks for sharing, mkglenney! As I keep saying, there's always a way. And I bet you'll look back on those two crazy days of moving with the whole family in a van very fondly for years to come. And what a great way to start a new life in a new house... with the whole family there, dogs included!
Pets are a part of the family, as you say. You wouldn't give up your grandmother just because she got a little too old or you didn't feel like bringing her with you, would you? Thanks for the comment, and if that photo looks like your dog, then Star is a beautiful dog!
I cannot ever imagine giving up any of our 7 pets!!! Our guinea pig even just went through surgery at the ripe old age of 5 to save her life. We are planning a cross-country move within the next 18 months, and I am already trying to figure out how we are going to transport the animals with us. They are our kids, our family - and I know they would never be happier anywhere else but with us.
Absolutely, Kat! A cross-country move can be tough on everyone so who better to help you settle in to your new home than your family? Thanks for the comment!
As for mam- I think that if you've done the best that you could, which it sounds like you did with a year in training, then you tried your best to make it work. So, like Helena stated, no one is a bad person for doing it, especially if you've tried your best to make it work.
As far as I'm concerned it's a given that when you take on a pet it's for the whole nine yards. When I still had the farm and my children were young, it was an open door to unwanted animals always. The kids and their friends brought something new home it seemed weekly. It felt like a Zoo at times. Most of those 'babies' came from homes where the owners had changed their minds. If I couldn't keep the animals I hunted high and low for a good home. Great hub regards Zsuzsy
Thanks, Zsuzsy Bee. It's always good to know there are other people who share similar feelings about their animals. When I own my own home, I would love to have extra space to take in all the unwanted pets for which I am able to care! I love that you did this when you had the means to do so, and thanks for the comment!
Great hub! When people adopt a pet it should be with the expectation that the pet is part of their family for life. I've heard many reasons why people give up their pets (I volunteer at a shelter) and it's heartbreaking to see these pets dumped off as if they're worthless.
However, on rare occasions - and I stress the word RARE - there are legitimate reasons for people giving up their pets. I remember one case where a young dog's owner had fallen ill and was getting progressively worse. She lived alone and was often hospitalized for long periods, and would arrange for someone to drop in on the dog and walk him. It still wasn't the same as the dog having a "full-time family" where he'd get lots of exercise and attention, so she made the difficult decision to find him a new home. She tried for months, but was unsuccessful and eventually brought him to the shelter. She was clearly traumatized. We could tell the dog was loved, he was so loving in return, well-behaved, housetrained, obedience trained, just an all-round great dog who was quickly adopted. Her friend came in every 2 or 3 days to visit the dog and make sure he was okay, right up until the day he went home with his new family.
These are rare cases, but thought I would mention that there are situations where the family is doing the right thing for the dog by finding him a new home. Thanks for writing this hub.
Thanks, dogsdogsdogs! (I've joined your fanclub, by the way.)
There is certainly always the rare occasion where rehoming is in the dog's best interest or is absolutely necessary. A family who had rescued a dog from the same rescue as us went bankrupt a year later and lost everything. They were forced to return the dog to the rescue because the family itself would have to split up and live with various relatives for a while. Not only could they not afford to care for the dog, they also didn't want to traumatize him by moving him around for however long until they found a permanent place to live.
The dog was still young, and I believe the rescue found him a new home quickly. It's seems to be the situations where people don't WANT to relinquish their pets but HAVE to (like in the story you told) that it's not absolutely deplorable.
Thanks for weighing in!
Great hub--I hope a lot of people read it BEFORE considering a pet. And that always seems to be the problem--people just put in enough thought before bringing a dog or cat or whatever home. Many people put a lot of selfish emotion in the decision.
I wrote a somewhat tongue-in-cheek list for listverse.com some time ago (Top Ten Dogs for Lazy Owners) because of the Christmas time talk I heard of getting or giving a dog as a present.
I love my dog, but it takes more than love to take care of him. And I will always take care of him.
There are legitimate reasons for people to have to give up their dog, but I think that what one person feels as legitimate, not everyone feels that way. I do agree dogsdogsdogs scenerio and helena's those are legit reasons.
But, I'm sure that people who give up dogs find that there reason is legit and a good one. If I recall. there was a woman who's daughter, never allergic to dogs before, gets pregnant and becomes allergic. She gave up the dog. I don't think that was a legit reason, personally, but I'm sure that woman did.
FitnessDog- I think giving any pet for any holiday or birthday is a BAD idea. Like parents gettign their kid a bunny on Easter, then in a few months when it's no longer cute putting it outside. Next thing you know there are a hundred bunnies. So definately, a good article for anyone considering a new pet, in this case a dog.
Definately takes more than love to take care of a pet.
I encourage everyone to read this if I hear they are planning on getting a dog. I would rather the dog not adjust to his new life with a "forever" family if he is just going to be dumped later on. Thanks for reading, FitnessDog, and thanks for commenting, as always, Whitney!
I truthfully have given away a pet because I had no time for it. At the time, my husband had just died, and I had two kids to raise and was working two jobs. I barely had time for my kids. It was a bird, and they need a lot of attention if they don't have other birds with them, because they are "flock" animals. I did find him a very good home with a loving family who had other birds. I had him a long time, and I could tell he was getting a little "edgy" being cooped up in the cage all the time alone. He wasn't good with the kids, and yes, we did try to get them adjusted to each other, but my son was 2 years old, and the bird just hated him. He scared the bird to death!
So I found him a home, and he was much, much happier. He had other birds, people who held and loved him a lot, and when I went to visit him, he looked much healthier. Birds can die from lack of attention. I wasn't about to let that happen just so I could keep him with me.
I won't have a dog, partly because I'm not a dog person, but mostly because I don't want an animal that has to be walked and bathed and all that. I love my cats. They're so self-reliant, and are happy just to be on my lap while I'm on the computer, watching t.v. or reading.
I still have birds, and I spend much more time with them now that I'm alone.
Looking at the photos, I want to say "I'll take them all".
Too often, people use dogs to fill a need and discard the pet when they get a new job or a new home - or find a new significant other. There is nothing sadder than a dog standing by the side of the road who has been dumped off and left. He's hungry and lost and waits anxiously for his people to return. In the past two years I've picked up 4 and been able to find homes for them. All four have turned out to be great pets in their new, loving homes.
Dogs aren't lawn ornaments or disposable products - they put absolute trust and loyalty in their owner. When you've had a rotten day, did nothing right, and made everyone around you angry - your dog is just excited to see you when you come home. He thinks you're perfect.
dafla -- I don't have much of a problem with your rehoming situation. It doesn't sound like you feel bad about it, and you shouldn't. You were in a tough situation, which was putting your bird in a tough situation. Birds can be very high-maintenance animals, especially if you want them to be happy. I actually commend you for being able to see that your bird was unhappy and THEN for going out and trying to find him the best new possible home. That's actually responsible pet ownership and is the opposite of the people I condemn in this hub! Thanks for weighing in!
ksbteam -- That's great that you've rescued 4 dogs, and in the purest sense of the word! I am just now getting into fostering for dog rescues, and I hope to be able to help as many dogs and families as I can in my short life. :) Thanks for your comment; you're totally right. The best thing at the end of a terrible day is how HAPPY your dog is to see you. There's nothing better.
Sometimes the kind of ppl who make these excuses really shouldn't have the animal in the first place. Many times, when folks relinquish the animal, they are outright lying about the reason. One of my foster dogs came from a woman who said she couldn't keep Lucky b/c of her health. Well, I found out from the vet (we just happened to take him to the same vet that she did) that Lucky's mom was a gambler. She often boarded the dog at the vet for whole days while she went to the casino. When I picked the dog up, I could tell that the woman kept him in a crate quite a lot when he was home. She admitted that she rarely walked him "because of her health." It was obviously much better for Lucky to get out of that situation.
I have fostered a couple other dogs who jumped the fence all the time at their previous homes. They never jumped my fence. They were simply trying to get away from those humans.
So, I agree that a dog is a lifelong member of the family. I would never give up any animal in my household. But I don't abuse or neglect my "fur-kids" either. Sometimes it's best for them to find a new home. It's so rewarding to be a foster parent and help an animal move on to a better life!
You're very right, 4Paws. Some people shouldn't have the animals in the first place, and the animal is sometimes much better off in a new home. But all too often the animal ends up dead in a shelter, so it's sort of a double-edged sword.
Hopefully, someone will read this hub and realize that having a pet might be "too much" for them and just not get one in the first place. Hopefully...
working
compu-smart says:
7 months ago
Good tips..My landlord does not allow me pets but i will never ever give up my cat..I would rather give up my home!!