As a father of a two-year-old daughter and expecting my second daughter in a matter of a month and a half, I know the importance of a father-daughter relationship. I have seen first hand the damage a poor relationship with your father is from my wife's relationship with her father. We all need our parents and when we have one that is lacking the commitment to loving you the way you need to be loved and cared for, it will undoubtedly affect you and the way you are molded as a person. I know there are instances where having good parents isn't going to stop you from being a royal screw up, but it certainly helps matters. I strive to be the best dad I can be and take pride in spending time with my daughter and making sure I have that one-on-one time to connect with her. I can't wait to do the same for my second daughter as well.

I am writing this to the father's out there that are possibly looking for ways to connect with your child, maybe you are searching for ideas on what to do with them as activities, or are completely new to being a dad and could use some solid advice. There are far too many dead-beat dads out there that don't put in the time and effort to creating a lasting bond with your child and spend too much time focusing on unimportant things. There are guys out there that have a hard time communicating love and have a hard time grasping how to be a good father even when it is not comfortable for you.

Babies:

When a baby is first born they have a natural need for their mother and sometimes you as a father feel left out. Depending on if your wife is breast feeding; a good way to establish a bond and connection is by feeding your baby a bottle. Now, if your child is being breast-fed you don't want to damage that process by introducing a bottle because it will confuse the baby and lead to problems being breast fed. You can find bottles that are in the shape of breasts with the same sort of nipple and use pre-pumped breast milk to feed your child while giving you wife a break.

A lot of men expect the mother to do all the feeding, especially breastfeeding and get up with the child at night whenever they cry. Getting up at night and taking care of your newborn by feeding, rocking and holding her will help you gain the confidence of the child and bond in a similar manner as your wife. Get involved with the daily activities of a new-born, talk to her, and make silly noises, faces and tickle them in order to get a response. It may seem trivial because they will not remember the actual activities as they grow, but they do remember your love and effort and they do begin to feel safe and loved which is a crucial component of being a good father.

Toddlers /Pre-Teens:

First of all, I work twelve hours a day (that includes commute time) and when I get home I have dinner as a family with my wife and daughter. Right after dinner I always make it a priority to spend the remainder of my time with her. For example, I get home at 5:30PM, eat dinner and spend time with my daughter until her bed-time which is 8:00PM. I get approximately two and a half hours to spend with my daughter per day during the week. Weekends I like to spend time as a family and do activities together, but sometimes I take her for a day with daddy.

It is very important for a young girl to have a strong male role model in her life. She needs to experience what it is like to have a male figure that can be counted on in good times and bad. She needs to learn from her father all the aspects of life that come from the male point of view. I have had many relationships with women who have had their share of "daddy issues" and it is very sad that these issues could have been avoided with a little time, effort and love.

I wanted to give the fathers and fathers to be some options and ideas on activities and ways to interact with your daughter. It's much easier for a father to connect with a son by relying on sports, physical activities etc. Some men don't know how to interact with their daughter and don't think they have a lot of options when it comes to being with their daughter. I am by no means wealthy, I am actually flat broke, so all my options are going to be inexpensive but mostly there will be no costs in these activities.

One of the easiest and most practical spots to take your daughter is the local park. I luckily have a park within walking distance from my house which makes things much easier. When at the park it is important that you don't let or expect your daughter to run off and play with the other kids and plop your behind on a park bench and space out. I always ask her what she wants to do first such as swing, go on the slide, play in the sand or go on the money bars. If there are other children there and she wants to play with them, that is when you can tell her to go ahead and play with the other children. Usually she likes me to push her on the swing, lift her onto the money bars, catch her at the bottom of the slide and climb on the play equipment with her. I have no problem acting like a kid and joining her by sliding down the slides, swinging and or climbing on the playground equipment. Some guys can't seem to let go of that macho mentality and feel silly playing with their child so they abstain for these activities. Who really cares if any other parent thinks you are crazy, you're not there for other parents, you are there for your child and to connect with your daughter. Playing at the park can last for hours or could be as brief as twenty minutes; the main goal is for her to have fun WITH you.

Piggybacking on the park topic, a great way to spend some quality time with your daughter before and after the park is to fly a kite. You can either make a kite on your own with your child before you travel to the park to fly it or simply purchase one from the store. When flying the kite you can educate them on the reason the kite is able to fly, how to fly the kite and if you build it yourself, you teach them how to construct the kite itself.

Another thing my daughter loves to do is go on wagon rides. My wife found a plastic little tykes wagon online for $20 and it has paid for itself within a week. When I ask my daughter if she wants to go on a wagon ride, she jumps at the opportunity and quickly heads for the door. We make plans to look for local neighborhood animals such as rabbits, birds, squirrels, ducks, dogs and cats. You can also do this just by taking a walk instead of a wagon ride, but toddlers get a tired of walking quickly. It is important to keep a constant dialog going between you and your daughter throughout the wagon ride so she knows you are interested in communicating with her and are not just trying to kill time. I believe children can sense when you are doing something just to appease them. During our wagon ride / walk, we look for random animals; point out airplanes and anything else of interest. I often ask her to tell me about what she did during the day and what she wants to do the next day.

In my area there are indoor moon-jump parks where you can take your children and experience a gigantic room filled with what my daughter calls "jumpa jumpas". Not only can you spend hours playing with your daughter, you also work up a good sweat and get an unbelievable workout in the process. The name of the place I take my daughter to is called Airtastic, and it costs $7.00 for children but adults are free. I find places like this very fun and worthwhile because not only do they have blast playing, but they learn how to maneuver through obstacle coarse settings, use their motor skills to climb up difficult inclines and interact with other children in a relatively safe environment. I only say relatively safe because even though the moon-jumps are filled with air and are soft as could be, my daughter got a nasty cut on her face sliding down a huge slide when she accidentally poked herself in the head as she fell. I like the fact that I am able to crawl into the moon-jumps, experience what she is experiencing and help her along the way with problem solving when it comes to navigating some of the numerous obstacle courses that are set up.

Every larger town/city has a nearby zoo which is always a great place to spend time with your daughter. Where I live, there is a small local zoo that has a decent amount of animals (nothing exotic) and even has a reptile house. The Brookfield Zoo, which is one of the best zoos in the nation is just a short drive away and presents unlimited opportunities to interact with your daughter. My child is very interested in animals and it is always fun to teach her about some of the animals, what they do in the wild, what they eat and what sounds they make. Usually the large zoos have a water show with dolphin which is a very fun experience for both you and your child. Nothing captivates a young child like watching a dolphin jump out of the water and do tricks in the water. Being at the zoo not only gives you time to spend with you daughter it also gives you the opportunity to educate them on the different species etc. The prices for zoos vary, but my local zoo is free and the Brookfield zoo is a little more on the pricey side. We opted for the zoo membership which is a much better deal if you plan on visiting on frequent occasions.

If you are lucky enough to be in a community / subdivision which has a pool, this is one of the great free activities you can do with your daughter. What child doesn't like to swim? I take my daughter there whenever possible (during the summer, I live in Chicago) and spend time playing with her and teaching her how to swim. When my daughter was only 6 months old, I enrolled us for a swimming class called "Diaper Dippers" which got her comfortable in the water and also helped me get comfortable caring for a baby / toddler in the water. I usually spend half the time in the pool with my daughter playing, throwing her up in the air and catching her and letting her jump to me from the edge of the pool, and the other half continually teaching her how to swim and not be afraid of me not always holding her in the water. I recently was able to let her go out on her own (with floaties) for a few minutes and also have been able to get her comfortable going under the water.

Another activity we partake in occasionally is going to the local pet store. Obviously going to a pet store is free but you do have to contend with the sales staff trying to sell you dogs, cats, birds and fish, but that is to be expected. It is imperative that your child knows before you enter the pet store, that you are not going to be purchasing a pet and I advise you to not take the puppies / kittens out of their cage to play. You don't want your child to bond or connect with one of the animals unless you plan on taking it home. I am sure people like me and my child are irritating to the employees of the pet stores, but I make sure we don't bother the staff by asking questions, requesting them to get any animals out or any other activity that may take them away from dealing with actual customers. My daughter likes to look at the kittens, puppies, rabbits, and then finally the fish. We don't make specific plans to visit a pet store; we just stop in when we are in the area.

Lastly, a few great spots to interact with your daughter/daughters are at local tourist destinations and/or state parks. In Chicago we have a few great destinations such as Navy Pier, Grant Park, Millennium Park, The Field Museum, Shedd Aquarium and the Museum of Science and Industry. The parks and Navy Pier are free but the museums and aquarium have entrance fees. Navy Pier has a children's section where they have local performers such as clowns, jugglers, and entertainers which give free shows every hour. A giant ferris wheel is available for rides ($3.50 per person) and you also have small shops /kiosks' and a large food court. The touristy park destinations have interesting sculptures, fountains and play equipment which will give you and your daughter plenty of activities to partake in.

As far as the museums are concerned, they can be on the pricey side of things and sometimes a child is not interested in focusing on something for such a long period of time. I suggest the museums as a good activity in the pre-teen years.

Teens:

Although I don't have a teen, I do have experience dealing with a teen for the past five years. My sister-in-law has had a very rocky relationship with her father, has gone through her parents divorce just as she turned thirteen and has had only me to look to as a male role model. She is quite a handful and she makes me crazy from time to time. Since I am not her father and just a brother-in-law it is hard to spend time with her and giver he the attention and love her real father is supposed to give; especially when I am working on my relationship with my own daughter.

My wife and sister are close so we usually include her in activities we have planned for our daughter, which sometimes works, sometimes not. If you are a parent to a teen and are searching for ways to get involved with your teen or are trying to strengthen your bond, here are some very easy and again cheap activities to suggest you do together. Be advised, teens usually don't want to be bothered by hanging out with their dad, they are much too busy trying to be social with their friends and or boyfriends etc. I could go on and on giving suggestions on what to do with your teen daughter but as of right now, I have no real experience as a father of a teen and just an outsider's perspective.

What I know to be effective such as making sure you have a family dinner together every night; is usually taken for granted. A lot of families eat on their own schedule, in front of the TV or in separate rooms apart from the rest of the family. I think a family setting for dinner is a very important part of being a family; it opens the door to communication. You are able to ask your daughter about her life, help her with problems and situations and reiterate that you are there for her. Having dinner such as this can lead to extended conversations about school, life, or any other struggles she is having in which you can connect. As your child grows they will look at family dinner as an important part of her day and will instill this in their life when they become parents.

It is always important that you at least invite your teen to do activities with you regardless of if you know they will not be interested. This shows you are making attempts and are willing to provide your time to her. A lot of fathers don't bother making attempts to spend time with their daughter because they know in advance that the answer will be no. Other parents, including my mother-in-law, force them to partake in spending time together which causes more harm than good. If my sister-in-law refuses to "hang-out" with her father or mother, she is punished which angers her and creates resentment. You need to express your desire to your daughter that you would like to spend some quality time together because it is important to you as a father and you miss being able to connect with them like you used to. If she feels you are sincere and truly want to spend quality time with her and not forcing her to do something she doesn't want to do, she will be more open to the idea and willing to take you up on your offer.

I feel the teen years are probably the hardest and I wish I could add more to this article about it. I guess I will have a wealth of knowledge in the next fifteen years that will give me the opportunity to communicate with my audience.