Here is another copy from my facebook notes collection. Read and enjoy (or cringe) ..sorry guys, it has to be said! :p

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November 2008 :
In a world where halitosis doesn't smell

I have recently found myself distracted by everything and everyone online and so took a short break from the online world of note writing. This was until I read a note posted by a friend (and for the record..DISTANT friend) who decided to publicly humiliate his girl friend ONLINE by telling the world (and her) in a note that she suffered from halitosis.

I found this note to be particularly cruel. For those of you that are cackling... please don't ask me who wrote the note as I have decided to save this poor unfortunate girl from further humiliation. Not only does she have halitosis... she also has a severe case of "men-a-tosis" <<menatosis: the disease of having awful taste in men>> ("osis" being derived from the Greek word meaning "condition"). This rather shocking public embarrassment does raise a few questions though. I mean, how do you tell someone you love.. (or supposedly love) that they have a bad case of stinky poo breath and might need to attend to it?

How do you do it? Do you just blurt it out over dinner?
"Honey, work was busy today. I had to deal with the auditors, handle staff disciplines and by the way, you have halitosis". As I am sure you can imagine... this could end badly.

Perhaps you whisper it in his / her ear discreetly, in hopes that the anguish of discovering you are intoxicating your partner mid kiss, doesn't send your loved one into a stress induced outrage?
Partner A: "hmm i love you so much..come here, im feeling naughty"
Partner B: "I love you too honey, but perhaps you would like to brush & gargle before we go any further?". This too could end rather painfully... for Partner B that is!!

The truth of the matter is... there is just no easy way to tell someone this kind of truth. The saying that the ever famous "they" said "The truth hurts"... has never been more true, than in these types of situations!

In a perfect world we would never be forced with this monstrous task, as there wouldn't be such a thing as halitosis or the stinkies in the first place. In this world we wouldn't run out of loo paper at inconvenient times or feel anger towards panel beaters who tell you that your metallic paint on your car cannot be matched resulting in a whole new spray job...(as accidents wouldn't exist either!) and the gut wrenching pain of stalkerish or unrequited love would be like water off a ducks back.

Unfortunately, this world does not exist... and halitosis most certainly does! So, it is in my opinion that if a loved one has halitosis, you do them the favour of letting them know...quietly, kindly and discreetly... it's the least you can do.... um and err Jon.. if i have stinky poo breath, the news better come from YOU!!! *cringes in hopes this never happens*

Ps. to halitosis public embarrasser dude (you know who you are)..... may your online reputation be squished and smushed like the slimy bug that you are!

** if you suffer from halitosis there are a few websites out there that can help you. There is one website that calls themselves the cure to halitosis and another that provides practical advice and home remedies for halitosis. I do not endorse or market either of these businesses but maybe it can help those who need it.