We, humans, are comminicating animals, made to live together in community. Most of us see having a significant other or lover as a key factor to happiness, and I personally share this opinion.

I don't mean that singles can't be happy, and as explained in the first post of this series, there are many sources of happiness. Even if the significant other is certainly an important one, it's not the only one.

But even if we're social animals, finding or having a significant other is not an easy thing, and paradoxally this is sometimes because of... social factors.

Many modern cultures makes the "Happy Forever" kind of relationship an ideal. Each of us should find his / her "moitié d'orange" and then can live together until death. This is certainly a pleasant idea, but I'm not yet convinced it is the best way to happiness.

If you think I gone crazy to challenge the typical fairy tales happy end, it simply shows how much you're affected by social factors. I won't tell the whole story of my life here, but let me say that I'm the product of a rather complicated family history, made of several mariages and divorces. I have first-hand knowledge of what it feels like to be a kid or teen-ager in the middle of easy or not so easy divorce cases.

When I discuss wether marriage is good or not, I often get the "it's better for children" argument in return. This argument is also a standard when talking about same-sex couples.

Debating how to raise children always seems a sensitive topic. Single parent, re-married partners, same-sex couples - all these options are controversial. Here again, the answer is simple: HAPPINESS !

It's certainly better raise kids in an happy but non-typical (biological parents only) family than in a sad or conflictful typical one. You think that kids educated by a lesbian couple will miss the "father image" ? Is that better than having kids seeing Mom and Dad constantly arguing, screaming at each other, and even worse ?

There are many out of family ways to find some missing elements, and a peaceful home is of paramount importance for kids to build some self-confidence. By the way, this also apply to orphans. Should gay and lesbian couples be allowed to adopt orphans ?

Same answer. Where is there more happiness ? In a gay / lesbian couple, or in an orphanage ?

I'm convinced that emotional stability is one of the pillars for a happy life, and some efforts are required to achieve and maintain it. But stability does not mean never changing anything.

One should certainly not break-up a relationship at the first troubled time. On the other hand, there's no reason to continue a relationship when it's definitively no longer an happy situation. I know the social pression is strong, but it's again a time perception question.

A divorce certainly represents a certain quantity of bad moments in near future, and this can seem worse than a long time unhappy relationship. This is wrong, but as it's closer in time, it's look more impressive. But are you really ready not to divorce and live an unhappy relation for the rest of your days, to avoid the temporary trouble of a divorce ?

Having multiple significant relations through our life is not a shame. Even changing your sexual orientation is not a shame. Some good friends of mine are in their second or third relation, some being homosexual. Once again, as long as all partners (kids included) are happy, I see no problem in that.

You probably start to understand what the point of this "way to happiness" series is. As I mentioned in the first post, we should aim at maximizing our happiness, and this of others.

Anytime you have to make an important decision, try to measure the options in terms of quantity of happiness. Obviously, you have to take in account the time perception to make the good choice. This decision making process will be the subject of a next hub in the series, because it also involves some other factors...

This hub is the third in a series entitled "The Road to Happiness". The first hub is "How to be happy... and why", and the second is "Time And Joy".

If you have proposals for next topics, feel free to propose them in comments.