You were dating a guy for a while.  You broke up because it just wasn't working.  Whether he broke up with you or you broke up with him, it still wasn't working.  At least one of you wasn't happy in the relationship and chances are, even if he did the dumping, you weren't that happy either.  You just didn't want to be alone. 

Now, you found out your best friend is dating him.  You see them laughing together, holding hands, and kissing in the hallway.  You feel betrayed.  Doesn't she know about Girl Code?  You never date your best friend's ex!  Or do you?

There are some definite times when you should step in and try to end it.  If he ever hit you, you should never let your friend date a boy that has abused you.  If she's your best friend, she should know he hit you.  If she doesn't, it time to tell her.  This is a serious accusation, though, and something that could ruin a boy's life.  If he never hurt you, don't lie about it.  If you're caught in a lie like that, it could ruin your life too.

What about a good guy?  What if you two broke up and he never abused you?  What do you do then?

 If you and your boyfriend broke up, you should definitely have some time to get over the break up.  Move on faster by finding something else to focus on.  Join a club, do something fun with your friends, flirt shamelessly with that cute boy at your bus stop.  Remind yourself that not only are you worthy of being loved, you are a strong, funny, smart, and all round amazing girl. 

Once you've had some time to move on, what about your friend hooking up with your ex?  Girls have a lot of drama in this department.  There's this rule that once you've dated a boy he's off-limits to all of your friends.  That's kind of selfish, don't you think?

Just because things didn't work out between you and your ex doesn't mean you friend can't be happy with him.  Different people and different personalities make for different relationships.  Your friend's happiness is worth more than your prior claim on your ex.  You should give her your blessing and move on with your life.  There's no sense in standing in the way of her happiness. 

How do you handle your friend dating your ex?  You keep your nose out of their relationship.  Don't give her tips.  Don't tell her "He likes it when...".  Don't try to ruin their relaitonship by giving her false information either.  Just be a good friend.  Having already dated him, you will know enough and be familiar enough with him to be friend's with your best friend's man. 

Avoid double dating until you've really moved on.  Going on a double date before you've moved on and gotten used to the idea of them dating will be very uncomfortable.  No one will have fun.  If your friend invites you, explain to her that you aren't ready for that step yet and you don't want to ruin the evening for them, but maybe some other time.  By the time you start dating someone else, you will be over your ex and hanging out as a group will be a breeze!