The many stages of childhood

I thought that I would write this because there is never enough information on why children do the things they do. I thought that it would be an interesting hub too.

Stage one: You have a baby, aww isn't this cute! The baby throws up on you and cries all the time, you get no sleep for the first 2 months as the baby eats every 3 hours. Your child is growing and needs this because their tummies are too small to sustain enough food for more than 3 hours at a time. You wake up at 2 am and than at 5am and than again at 8am to feed your child. You realize that you look like crap and feel tired all the time. This is the hardest part of a small baby. They need you all the time.

Stage two: Your baby is now 6 months old and he/she is rolling around and starting to crawl. You think sweet no more late nights and you get more sleep. You realize that he/she is chewing on every thing and drooling every where. Do not worry it just means that they are cutting teeth(teething). Here is the fun part. You need to buy some tylenol and than a chewing toy that you can put into your fridge so that it can help them cut the teeth. Most children cry when they are teething. On lighter side if you are one of those lucky parents your child only whimpers for an hour and than it is over. Your child is now eating baby food and taking a bottle. You now get to look forward to food being thrown at you. Do not worry it only gets worse :). Remember your child will now start to slowly babble at you and you have no idea what they are saying. This is good because in the next few stages you can not get them to be quiet lol. It is all good though because you love your children. I know I do.

Stage three: You child is now a year old. Starting to walk. You get your video camera out so that you can get the child's first steps. Your child will not try to walk while you have the camera is running they sit on the floor and smile at you. Now what?? This is where the parents need to get creative. Put the camera somewhere so that the child does not see it and than it is easier to get those moments. Your child is smarter than you think. They are quicker than you and they are smarter than you. The reason for this is because everything is new to them. Now they can reach the table and pull your plates and cups off the table. They can put peanut butter sandwiches in your VCR, they also can reach your dvd collection and chew on them. :) By stage three your house should have been child proofed! lol. If you have stairs the child will go up them if they are not blocked by a baby gate. You child should almost be talking now too. They should be saying stuff like Dada, mom, hi, up and ok.

Stage four: Your child should be about 15 months old. Their favorite word right now is NO. You tell them not to touch something and it is NO. That is the worst word for a parent to hear from a small child. I know my daughter does it to me all the time. lol. Your child will be ready to try stuff like pasta, apples, oranges,all kinds of things. Oh, But the faces they make! lol it is so cute! If they do not like the food they will........ YOU guessed it! they throw the food at you. hahahaha. They also like to test your limits and see how far they can push you by this point. Do not give up there is more. lol when they are sleeping they will make sure that you have a nice present for you later on when they wake up.

Stage five: Potty training time! You go to the store and you buy a potty for your child because you feel it is time to train them to use the toilet. They only way that you can train your child is to go by their time. They will do everything with the potty but use it at this stage. You will know when your child wants to potty train when they start to take their diapers off and throw them on the floor. When your child does this than you put them on the potty and give them a cookie. The cookie is too keep them on the potty. If you do not give them the cookie they will sit on the potty for about 2 seconds and than run away. Remember GIVE THEM THE COOKIE!!! lol.

these are only five stages! But the rest goes as follows.

Once your child has been potty trained they than learn to put sentences together and than they are ready to go to pre school. After pre school is kindergarten and than you know the rest! Your children as they get older only get louder and you think to yourself my have they grown. But Waite, Remember all the bad things you did as a child and a teenager to your parents............ Your parents see this as an opportunity to spoil the children rotten and send them back to you to deal with. :)

One other thing if you ever ask your children why they did something the answer you will get is I DON'T KNOW! hahahaha. I have 2 wonderful children and I would not change anything about them. They are growing and learning through everything they do.

Well I hope that you all got a good laugh and well enjoyed the hub!