Understanding men for dummies
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I'm writing this first as an understanding that every human being desperately wants to feel a connection to something no matter how big or how small. It's in our want and need for that connection that we sometimes take drastic and often destructive measures to attain that connection and sometimes it's the foolish actions we take that cut off our chances for a connection.
With that said, I hope your eyes are still connected to these words because this information is especially necessary for every woman on this earth. I present to you, a man's point of view on understanding men. This is such a serious and debatable topic of discussion that of course won't go away with just the words that I'm saying, but hopefully my words will help women understand men better. You can google "understanding men" and you're hit with over 11,000,000 results and magazines like Cosmopolitan, Essence, and Redbook will claim to share the ultimate secrets of understanding men, but there's one problem I need to speak about. You will never ask your mechanic for a pap smear and you should never ask a woman for advice on understanding men! Even the "happily" married woman is not an expert to understanding men because she only knows the man that she is with and even then, he may be aloof on certain topics that she's oblivious to.
The first thing you must do in order to understand a man is to leave your brain at the door. There have been countless comedians that speak on how simple a man is and many have broken down our basic needs to 1) food, 2) sex, and 3)shelter. Yes, those are our basic needs plain and simple. For those who want to complicate things, I'll mention a few accessory needs:
1- Laugh at our jokes from time to time (they may all be corny, but it makes us feel like you're interested).
2 - Don't ask us questions that any answer we give will end in an argument(see #4).
3- Men will brag about the smallest things and every once in a while, humor the bragging. It makes us feel good, therefore, we'll want to do more for you.
4 - We REALLY don't want to argue with you.
5- We actually want to know what's on your mind. One of the main reasons is so that we know what to avoid so you won't be mad(especially at us), but we don't want to know what's on your mind or share feelings when we're doing something that's important to us. Yes, this includes any game that has the word "rival", "playoff" and especially "championship" connected to it.
I don't necessarily agree with the "men are from mars.." concept, but there are many obvious differences. Deep down, any decent man that's in a woman's life honestly just wants to find out what it takes to make her happy. The only thing that a woman has to do is open up and let him. Saying things like "you should know" or "you need to figure it out for yourself" only leaves a man feeling rejected and disgusted. On top of that, phrases like this are the precursors for upcoming arguments(please take the time to reread accessory need #4). If you've been serious about reading this article, then hopefully either a few misunderstandings have been cleared up or even better, you now know to seek the true source for all male enlightenment...another man!
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Comments
Check the accessory needs too though. The biggest thing to remember is that if #4 is being upheld, we men will work HARD to make you ladies happy.
It is truly a shame that the majority of men can be accurately described in this light. It truly makes us sound as shallow as we are. Number 4 is dead on. I would rather have a root canal than argue with my wife.
Can't wait to read more from you... :-)
to Stay at Home Dad - I think it's a mix of shallowness and the fact that no matter how smart or larger than life we make ourselves out to be, beneath it all, we're just simple. I would love to write a hub on understanding women, but alas, that's one nut I have yet to crack.
Hi Talented-ink,
First, I have to say, if I leave my brain at the door, I believe most any man would run the other way. Oh yes, there are men who go for the simple woman with not much going on upstairs, but mostly, men want a woman with a functioning brain :)
Growing up in the 50s, it was generally held that in order for a woman to understand a man, all she had to do was keep a clean house, raise the kids, have a meal waiting for the hubby, and pleasure him whenever he wanted it. It was not common practice for a woman to speak her mind, but I believe she understood what was necessary to not only please a man, but to understand his needs.
Thankfully, as years went by, these stereotypes fell by the wayside. Marriage, by definition, is a partnership. And that's where it ended. Blame womens' lib, or just maybe women were beginning to realize that they too, had a brain and started using it.
So, understanding men, or understanding women is not as hard as people make it out to be. Communication is the key. Without that, you have nothing.
Thanks for sharing,
Trish












PEN-n-PAD says:
17 months ago
Absolutely hilarious, boy Maslow's hiarchy of needs is way off... let me see if I got this food, sex and shelter. Oh see now there I go already bringing my brain with me to this article-typical. You know I've had men actually tell me the same thing. That they are simple, but I beg to differ. I have a feeling if all a girl had to offer were those three things, she'd be replaced faster than you could write your next blog!
Pnp~nothing makes sense until it does