Many children have trouble getting to sleep or staying asleep at night, and this can be very hard for you as a parent. If children do not sleep, parents do not sleep. When the parents do not get sleep the next day is typically not very pleasant as tempers are short, and moods are often bad because you simply do not feel well. So, it is important to know when your child is experiencing a normal sleep issue, or if your child has a sleep problem. Typically if your child is still not sleeping through the night by the age of 2 years, they may have a sleep problem.

What are the most common sleep problems in children?

There are two problems that are very common among children when it comes to sleep. The first is that of the child struggling to fall asleep or stay asleep, and the second is that of having nightmares, night terrors, or sleepwalking. In other words, either they do not sleep restfully, or they have something that interrupts their sleep.

How can you know if your child has a sleep problem?

While it is difficult to assess sometimes whether or not your child has had a bad night, or is suffering from a sleep problem, there are some symptoms that are common of problems. If your child is experiencing one or more of these symptoms, there is a good chance they suffer from a sleep problem:

If your child wakes up three or more times a night on at least four nights a week they likely have a sleep problem.

If your child wakes up for more than 20 minutes on the nights they awaken, they likely have a sleep problem.

If your child can't fall asleep after more than 30 minutes after you put them down, they may have a sleep problem.

If your child refuses to go to sleep or needs a parent with them in order for them to fall asleep, there is a chance they suffer from a sleep problem.

If your child has to be in your bed in order to get restful sleep, they likely have a sleep problem.

The sleep problem probably has something to do with bad dreams, nightmares, or night terrors if your child is exhibiting the following symptoms:

They do not want to go to bed, and fight it even after you put them in their beds, and go through the night time routine.

If your child has a severely emotional tantrum at bedtime because they do not want to go to bed.

If your child wakes up a lot during the night.

If your child can't go to sleep on their own.

Many children exhibit these symptoms on an occasional basis, it is up to you as a parent to determine if they are exhibiting them on a regular enough basis to warrant worry. If you are worried, or if you feel your child has a sleep problem, the next question is what can you do about it? How do you treat sleep problems?

While every child is different, there are some standard things that you can do to help improve your child's effectiveness in sleeping.

The first is to set up a positive bedtime routine. With children, routines, organization, and structure go a long way. Often when they do not have a routine, the chaos makes their minds cluttered, which makes it difficult to sleep. So, establishing a positive bedtime routine. will help your child settle more quickly and make them wake less during the night. If you have previously not had a routine, it will take a while for your child to get used to it, and it may take up to six weeks for you to see the results, but you will find that there ware fewer tantrums, the child will go to bed faster, and will sleep better if you get a positive routine going.

What does a positive routine consist of?

A positive bedtime routine means that you have a short lead up to bed. This should be calming, and something you do each night. This could include things like eating a snack, brushing teeth, changing into pajamas, then getting into bed for a story, song, and kiss goodnight. In addition to the short calming routine, you need to make sure the environment they are in is conducive to sleep. This means that the room you put them in to sleep should be a good temperature, dark, and quiet. If you live in a noisy area, it is wise to get a sound machine that has white noise to help drown out other sounds. You may also want to keep their room clean and free of clutter as their mind will rest more easily if this is the case. In addition to a routine and a positive environment, you need to make sure your child is in the mindset for going to bed. This means no rough housing, or loud active play before bedtime, and not giving them sugary snacks, or caffeine before you send them to bed. If you can help them to get in this positive routine, they will be able to rest easier, and sleep better.

If a positive bedtime routine does not work, consider combining it with sleep training to help your child settle at night, and learn to settle themselves. Sleep training teaches children o settle themselves and reduces waking during the night.

This has proven to be an effective method for overcoming sleep problems of many vrieties. Research shows that after a month of sleep training children don't wake as often during the night, take less time to settle at night and are more likely to get themselves back to sleep after waking at night.

So what is sleep training?

Sleep training can be extremely difficult for some parents because essentially what you do is you put your child to bed, using a bedtime routine, and then you leave the room and ignore their cries. You do not stay in there while they fall asleep. You do not let them out of the room, crib, etc. and you do not respond no matter how hard, or how long they cry. Usually it gets easier, and they cry for a shorter period of time.

If you find that you are struggling too much with sleep training to do it, try a gradual approach, which is often easier on you and the child, but does take a lot longer to see results. The gradual approach involves putting your child to bed, and waiting through a full two minutes of crying before you go to your child. Then the next time they wake up, or the next night when you put them to bed, you wait for four minutes. You add two minutes per time, so the third time you wait six minutes, etc. Gradually work your way up to waiting for twenty minutes of crying before going to your child. If they are still crying for the full twenty minutes, just keep it there until they stop. However, usually by the time you get to waiting twenty minutes for the child to stop crying, your child has learned to self soothe, and does not need you to come in.

If you can't even start with time, consider distance. You can start in their room by their bed. The next night move away from the bed by two or three feet. The next time two or three feet more, then outside the door, then down the hall, or in another room.

In addition to establishing a routine and sleep training, help your child avoid sleep problems by doing the following:

First, address their fears and do not add to them. Some children struggle with sleep because they are afraid of the dark, of monsters, or something else. Address such problems by putting a night light in their room. Having them watch you check closets and under the bed before they go to sleep, etc. Also, never try the scare tactic to get your child to sleep. Telling them that a bear will get them, or that they boogey man is going to come out will worsen the problem, not correct it.

Second, make sure your child wants sleep. Do this by avoiding letting your child nap too late or for too long in the afternoon.This often leads to them not being tired enough at bed time, or not being ready to sleep because they want to play more.

Make sure your child is fairly active during the day. Getting some exercise should
help, but be sure you do not do it too close to bedtime as you do not want them all wound up.
 
Spend time out of doors during the day. Daylight helps the body to make natural melatonin, which keeps our 'body clock' regular. So being outside for some time during the day can help your child crave sleep when the sun is down.