VH1 Rock Of Love .My only reality...with updates

I am hooked..Last season I started watching Vh's Rock of Love which is a reality show featuring Bret Michaels of the 80's hair band Poison and his quest for "The One". The show features a group of women ( for a lack of better term) from whom Bret will choose the woman that will "rock his world". Last season was the first run and was quite entertaining. The wig wearing rock star weeded out the girls and the final episode featured him choosing Jes over Heather which a could completely understand.This is an entertainment show so I expect the producers to keep a few insane women around to keep it exciting ( see Laci) but there is something quite disturbing about a really hot chick who could pull a Bobbit on you for now consoling her after she breaks a nail. This season thus far has provided an ample amount of saline and schizo and I am hooked again.

Bret Michaels actually comes off as a cool, caring and understanding guy. His interview on the show are often funny and enlightening, It is quite ironic that the person with the most sense on the show is a rock star. I wonder where they find the girls though, I mean other than strip clubs and meth clinics.

At the time of this writing Vh1 has aired 4 episodes of the Rock Of Love. All you need to know so far is that Christy Joe cried on the last episode, and on tonights episode, a bitch gang has formed to annoy her and that is about all. Below are the remaining nut jobs and some info about each and their odds of staying around to " Rock His World"

Kristy Joe is quite attractive, almost enough that you may actually keep the snot rag that she would require you to carry due to her frequent crying spats. She seems genuine...like the girl next door who was raised by a step father , got fake boobs and ran off with a struggling musician and got married...twice. In fact she told Bret she is actually still technically, sort of, kinda still married. Hey everyone makes a mistake, twice. She probly is just a nice girl who made a bad choice, twice, and found her way....after posing for Playboy, and appearing in front of millions of people chasing an 80's rockstar.

Hot Factor: 8

Crazy Factor: 9

Bitch Factor: 1

Chance of staying on: 1/12

Her Rock of Love Profile

Her Webpage

Her Myspace

She has two restraining orders on her ex and current husband. Either she attracts crazy or seeks it, either way the bait is tainted.

New Odds: 1:19

She is dirty, crazy and needy....this will keep her around but won't make her the one

New Odds: 1:4

UPDATE....crazy makes an apperance...I think it is getting on his nerves...good for ratings, bad for his wigs.

New Odd...unchanged

Oh Daisy! Daisy has a squeaky voice, and lips slightlysmaller yet no more natural than her breasts. With a sleeve a tattoos, cosmetic augmentations abound and an intelect just shy of retardation Daisy would make a great groupie, porn star and future Wafflehouse waitress but I don't see her keeping Bret mentally engaged. This could be due to age or too much lip injections gone wrong, but she is cute and I am pulling for her, or to her.or something. Some Quates from her profile on Vh1 Rock Of Love :

"I started off in ""03 as

the bass player for a renowned underground band by the name of Seraphim Shock"

Renowned?

"I am currently co/writing my own music" If you have a cowriter, is it really your "own"music?

"The supernatural is a huge part of my life" It also seems to be a large part of her chest.

Hot Factor: 7

Crazy Factor: 1

Bitch Factor:1

Circus freak surgical procedures factor: 7

Chance of staying on: 1/9

Daisys Rock Of Love profile page

Daisys MYSPACE page

Update: After watching the mud bowl and seeing Daisy being a tenacious little mudfish, I am raising her odds. Not only was she the star of the team, her interviews were not filled with caddy , bitchy comentry blaming the other players. I am starting to like this big lipped bimbette.

New odds : 1/5

Still showing a lead but lost some footing this week. Teaming up with Meg the bitch won't help. The stupid stunt setting up lawnchairs in front of Brets door was childish. She needs to shut up most of the time. Cute turns to annoying real fast.

New odds 1:3

UPDATE poor showing at the USO event. When she was singing she looked like a catfish trying to eat breadcrumbs. Didn't knwo the words to star spangled banner, could write that off to nervousness...or inbreeding...

new odds.....holding steady at 1:3

Ambre seems to be the voice of reason on this show. At 33 she is a bit older than the other girls and would make a great leading MILF on youporn. She has yet to come across as obnoxious or needy or requiring anti psychotic medication, so She is in my top 3. she also has a :Master in Fine Arts with an emphasis in Acting which would explain her qualifications to be on The Rock Of Love.

Hot Factor: 7

Crazy Factor:1

Bitch Factor:1

Classy Website factor: 5

Cheesey annoying Myspace page factor: - 8

Chance of staying on: 1/4

Ambres Rock Of Love Profile

Ambres Website

Ambres Myspace

Update: Ambre rocked in the mudbowl...and didn't manage to shoot her mouth off during the show again...and that is a big plus, for that I am updating her odds.

New Odds 1:5

Ambre is starting to become ole reliable...like a bowl of porage...not too cold, not too hot...she needs to step it up....slutting it up in the dark helped a little..the scabby knees hurt.

UPDATE still holding out as the classy one, but showing some spunk...the cankles may start to hurt her...She should make it to the top 3 but then be plucked off like a destiny ass pimple.

New odds 1:3

Megan Hauserman is one of the bitch gang girls...other than that she doesn't seem to contribute to the show, or the world for that matter. She is a playboy model, but who reads playboy anymore anyway. I can see Bret keeping her around just because she looks good, but a nice ottoman would provide more use and require less Midol.

Hot Factor: 8

Crazy Factor: 1

Bitch Factor: 8

Annoying Myspace page Factor: 12

Chance of staying on 1/6

Megans Rock Of Love profile

Megans annoying Myspace

Too bad we didn't get to see this miserable bitch slide her ass in the mud. I am starting to think she was brought on the show just to be a thorn in everyones side. After not being picked for the football team ( even the fat kid got picked instead of her) she just stood on the sidelines making smartass remarks abotu how she didn't even want to play....as good as she looks I am starting to think she emits a sour caustic discharge from her privates. She will stick around but just for some spice to the show.

New Odds: 1:7

I really think she was just put on the show and told to be a bitch to keep some drama flowing. Nobody can be that conceded.

New Odds: 1:5

UPDATE dumb bitch

odds 1:4 only kept around for looks and she isnt even pretty

She felt ignored by Bret and told him so. Then in an act self sacxrafice she left the show so Kristy Kleenex Joe could stay on. A very dramatic and touching scene it was, I respect her for doing that....yeah righttttt. Here is her "about me" from the Rock Of Love site. Even in GED class they must stress the limited use of "I": while writing...don't they?

"About Yourself: I am a very creative, motivated

Maybe she just needed to get warmed up before writing...lets look at her interests :

"I love to sing. I love to dance. I

She loves everything from Michael McDonald to Metallica.....not Aerosmith to Zebra, not ABBA to Yes....Just the m's I guess.

Well she left the show tonight so I guess we will have to wait for Playboys Girls of Rock Of Love special edition.

Aubrys Rock of Love profile

Aubrys Myspace

Aubrys Website

She is 45.

Looks good for 45.

She is 45

See the 45 year olds Rock Of Love Profile

Hot Factor: 5

Crazy Factor:1

Bitch Factor:1

Chance of staying on 1/45

Update....all she has done so far is to make a pool shot....the affirmative action angle can't last too much longer.

New Odds 1: 18

She is so out she finally caught up with her hairstyle.

OUT!!!!!!!!!!1

Inna....that's all....one name...like Madonna, Prince, Elvis or virgin. She is tall, sexy, quiet. From the ukraine which means one day she will get really fat and hairy, but will mow the lawn and not bitch when it is cold. I like her, for now. She may be too quiet for Bret to choose on the show, but I think he would do well with her.

Hot Factor: 8

Crazy Factor:1

Bitch Factor:1

Accent Factor 8

Chance of staying on 1/3

Innas Rock of Love Profile

Update.....she looked like an offensive lineman in the mud....

no change in odds.

Bret called her his Ukranian love tank....mor elike love bus...I think she is getting larger each week. I think she is next on the chopping block.

New Odds: 1/10

UPDATE off of the show, good news: Odds of getting signed as defensive lineman for Carolina panthers: 1:12

I was writing my updates while watching the mudbowl episode when it got to elimination and I was sucked in like everyone else into thinking Daisy was going to get voted off. I was livid, I was about to film a crying Youtube rant and banish VH1 to reality show neverneverland when the shoe dropped and Daisy was kept on. I still think she may be edged out just simply due to age, but she is by far the leader at this point.

I know I have left off a few girls, Peyton left a note to see Bret, then when she got a chance to talk to him she cried. Then she asked if he was attracted to her and he gave an answer much like Kelly Andrews gave me when I asked her if she liked me back in 9th grade. Right now she is getting a sympathy pass.

Destiny has shown many asprects of her personality. Bitch, nag and caddy tramp. I have not seen any endearing qualities yet from Destiny and after seeing her lined up next to Inna and realizing her gut was bigger, she has about as much of a shot at Bret as Big John does with Daisy.

Update: only still on to add to the drama...no shot...go back to hooters.

Jessica Kinni is my dream girl and I hope she gets voted off soon and is thrust back into the viable uterus pool. She is hot but more impostantly is smart and doesn't have a Myspace page. Come to me my love.

Update....won a date and I think won some attention. She is too nice for Brett, I am still waiting for her.

Update: won another date....i feel her slipping away from me....perhaps the show will end prematurely and we shall be united

I got into a fight with my cable company ( well the finance department) and I did not see the ending. I know who won, but not the specifics of it. Jessica did not win, and that is all that mattered. I did do a good jobpicking the final 2 al throughout the show. I will admit I am suprised Destiny made it that far. Well until the next show....