“Question: What do you call a thousand lawyers chained to the bottom of ocean?

 Answer: A good start!”

 ---- Movie “Philadelphia”.

 I have always wondered what makes the lawyers and the law a butt of such jokes. I am sure you must have heard hundreds of lawyers’ jokes. What have the lawyers done wrong to deserve this, except to interpret the law?

 Ahh! The law! Perhaps, therein lies the answer!

A whole bunch of old, outdated laws still exist in the statute books around the world. Possibly, they had a rhyme or reason at the times of their enactment (at least some of them may have), but they are positively hilarious in the modern times. I have compiled a list of 25 such laws, which are sure to give you the laughs! I had originally planned to compile them in a ranked list, but I was not sure which one takes the cake! Perhaps you may help me!

And yes! Before you start reading the list below, there is a Statutory Warning:

"All the readers are required to place their tongues firmly in cheeks, before they shall venture on reading this list."

Enjoy!

1) England: The head of any dead whale found on the coast of Britain is legally the property of the King. On the other hand, the tail belongs to the Queen.

2) Kentucky: It is illegal to carry a concealed weapon more than six-feet long.

3) Florida: An elephant tied to a parking meter must pay the regular parking fee.

4) Belvedere, USA: No dog shall appear in public without its master on a leash.

5) England: It is illegal not to tell the taxman anything you don’t want him to know, though you don’t have to tell him anything you don’t mind him knowing.

 6) Oklahoma: If dogs wish to congregate in groups of three or more on a private property, they need to obtain a permit which must be signed by the Mayor. 

7) Idaho: It is illegal for a man to present a box of chocolates to his girlfriend if it weighs anything less than 50 pounds. 

8) Blythe, California: A person must own at least two cows before he can be permitted to wear cowboy boots in public. 

9) Los Angeles: While committing a bank robbery, it is illegal to shoot the teller with a water pistol. 

10) Hong Kong: A betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband’s lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

11) Santa Cruz, Bolivia: It is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.

12) Thailand: It is illegal to leave your house if you are not wearing underwear.

13) Israel: If you have been maintaining an illegal radio station for five or more years, the station becomes legal.

14) Denmark: Before starting the car, the driver is required to check lights, brakes, steering and honk the horn. He also needs to make a visual check to make sure there are no children underneath the car.

15) Australia: It is illegal to roam the streets wearing black clothes, felt shoes and black shoe polish on your face as these items are the tools of a cat burglar.

16) England: It is illegal for a male to urinate in public. It is allowed only if the person aims for the rear wheel of his motor vehicle and his right hand is on the vehicle at all the time.

17) York, England: It is perfectly legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow and arrow, except on Sundays.

18) Liverpool, England: It is illegal for a woman to be topless in public except as a clerk in a tropical fish store, or in a bank if handling foreign currency.

19) Canada: If you are released from prison, it is required that you are given a handgun with bullets and a horse, so you can ride out of town.

20) Washington, USA: It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police that he is entering the city. 

21) Texas: When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.

22) Memphis, Tennessee: It is illegal for a woman to drive by herself. A man must walk or run in front of the vehicle, waving a red flag in order to warn approaching pedestrians and motorists if the vehicle is going over 5 mph.

23) Nebraska, USA: A motorist approaching a horse at night must send up warning red rockets and Roman candles, throw a scenic tarpaulin over his car to conceal it from the horse, and take his machine apart and hide the parts in the grass if the tarpaulin doesn't soothe the horse.

24) Kentucky, USA: No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she is escorted by at least two officers or unless she is armed with a club. The provisions of this statute shall not apply to females weighing less than 90 pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds, nor shall it apply to female horses.

25) England: A pregnant woman can legally relieve herself absolutely anywhere she wants; even, if she so requests, in a policeman’s helmet.

So, this was a small list of the zaniest, weirdest, craziest and the most hilarious laws from around the world. Do you know of any more such laws? I would love it if you could share it with me here!