What are the benefits of living together before marriage(cohabitation)? Are there consequences and moral implications?

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By Shil1978



Cohabitation is much more prevalent in the western world.  There is increasing acceptance to the practice now.  In the years gone by, it certainly was something that was frowned upon and opposed vehemently.  Even today, there are groups who oppose them, especially religious ones.  Those opposing cohabitation argue that it trivializes the institution of marriage.  According to them, couples take their relationship less seriously in a cohabitation situation and are less likely to really work at their relationship - as opposed to if they were married.

As far as benefits go, well I guess one of the reasons why couples choose to cohabitate is that they want to get to know the person more completely.  They may want to know whether they would really be compatible with each other.  There are certain aspects of a person you don't really know until you are living with that person 24/7, that's one argument put forward.  Maybe cohabitation tests compatibility the best and could perhaps save future discord.  Some couples may consider lack of commitment as being a benefit.

Certainly, there might be serious consequences to cohabitation in other countries (non-western ones), but I don't know of any consequence that exists in the western world.  In much of the world, cohabitation is taboo.  I think in some Islamic countries it is illegal - I don't know if it is punishable by death though - could be!!! 

I personally don't believe in cohabitation.  In some cases, there might be reasons why couples can't marry and so choose to cohabit - I can understand that.  But, other than that, I don't believe cohabitation really benefits in any sense.  I would like to state though that this is just my personal opinion - perhaps I could be wrong.

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Lgali profile image

Lgali  says:
11 months ago

very good article,

I personally don't believe in cohabitation

eovery profile image

eovery  says:
11 months ago

I am with Lgali, If you want a true relationship with the person, cohabitation is only make believe. They are only fooling themselves.

Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978  says:
11 months ago

Thanks Lgali. My views are the same.

Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978  says:
11 months ago

eovery, yes I too think its make believe. I guess its the fear of commitment more than anything else.

babarushe profile image

babarushe  says:
11 months ago

Thanks Shil1978 for your answer to my hub request. I personally don't support the concept and act of cohabitation.

But since my proposed book has a section on cohabitation, I have to actually sanction peoples' opinion in this regard.

So it sounds great that you responded positively. I love it.

In the part of the world where I live, cohabitation is increasingly becoming a serious issue especially in the cities and I am so disturbed that majority of these men after living with the women, having sex with them, getting domestic care from them just abandon them for other ladies or simply go to the village to get "fresh" girls who are young and naive as wives. That's an act of irresponsibility and fear of commitment.

You got it right- cohabitation is as a result of fear of commitment.

If you have been crazy about the lady initially, why don't you marry her instead of hiding under the guise that your family doesn't support the relationship or that your mother would disown you if you marry her.

http://monyontrees.blogspot.com

jcd302 profile image

jcd302  says:
11 months ago

If the idea as you say is to better learn about each other and if your compatible, why are the divorce rates higher now that people cohabitate before marriage? Just another argument against it.

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