Eye contact flirting and love

We'll start with 'staring' in various intensities and types. How hard someone is staring at you can tell you a lot about what they are thinking.

The Sideways Glance:

This gesture is one of the first signals of romantic interest. Because it is subtle and sly, it allows an individual to flirt without being obvious. While the interested woman may boldly stare at her intended, she will demurely lower her head and tilt it away from his. In so doing, she can veil her brazen move under the cover of shyness. (Men are usuallya little less subtle ... male attraction via eye interestis covered fully towards the bottom of this message)

The Prolonged Glance:

A more overt gesture than the aforementioned, the lingering gaze has no pretense of coyness. This is an indication of someone who wants to get right down to business. As a result, the prolonged glance indicates sexual attraction and pure lust. For the less brazen, but still interested person, such eye contact may be intermittent but repetitive, with momentary looks away and returns. If the lingering occurs midway through a conversation, however, rather than during an introduction, it more likely indicates interest in the conversation.

The Hard Stare:

Often accompanied by hooded lids and constricted pupils, the hard stare is typified by the movie villain. Such a penetrating gaze signals that the individual possesses an invasive, aggressive or threatening mood.Note that the hard stare is distinguished from the prolonged glance in that, during the amorous or lustful prolonged glance, the glancer provides periodic brief breaks from the lingering, whereas the hard stare just does not let up!

The Up-and-Down Gaze:

Often referred to as the "once-over," this eye movement is often seen in men on the prowl. When a man looks a woman up and down, he is apprising her as a potential bed partner. If he performs this gesture more than once, chances are he likes what he sees in a physical sense and his sensual imagination may be running away with him. Women are also prone to the 'once over', but are usually more polite about it and are less likely to get caught!

The Even Gaze:

If an individual meets you in the eye, without holding the glance for too long, you can generally assume that no romantic ploys are involved and that (s)he is just being generally inviting.

The Averted Gaze:

This is a strong indication that your counterpart is being deceitful. She may either be outright lying or she may simply be feeling guilty about what is being discussed. Eye rubbing, as an excuse to look away, may also indicate untruthfulness (for further discussion on this topic, refer to the next chapter). However, looking away IN RESPONSE to an overly long gaze should not be interpreted as deceit, but rather just an effort to reduce intimacy.

The Closed Eyes:

This is not the same thing as a blink, but rather a prolonged closing of the eye that is visually perceptible to the viewer. If you see your counterpart performing this gesture, it's a good indication she doesn't want to hear any more about what you are discussing. This signal is often accompanied by raised eyebrows.

The Upward Rolling Eyes:

Often seen when someone disagrees with what you have said or can't believe you are speaking the words you are. Rolling eyes are indicative of exasperation.

Last ... since so many women ask (and men don'tseem to be aware) ... we'll conclude this messagewith a detailed discussion about ...

How men display attraction with their eyes ...

When a man is interested in a woman, the woman will likely "feel his eyes upon her." When she meets his gaze she will note that he holds it longer than is typically considered proper or customary. The gaze might turn into a "roaming of the body," with the eyes lingering momentarily on sexual body parts. Women see this all the time when they find men ogling their bosoms rather than concentrating on their faces.

But sustained eye contact (face to face, not ooglingthe body!) CAN be (especially when taken in combination with other bodily cues) an obvious signal of attraction. But there may still be certain situations where an intense gaze leaves you wondering exactly what someone's intentions are. For example, if a guy stares a woman in the eyes in a business situation, but he stares hard into her eyes, is there any possibility he likes her? We must examine the context of the situation and the accompanying gestures. If a scenario such as this occurs in, say, a classroom or a business meeting, it may only indicate that the man is extremely interested in what the woman is saying.

Look for indications like turning part of his body away from the woman or references to the professional nature of the encounter.

If these aspects are present, you can assume interest in communication only. If they are absent, however, then there is a distinct possibility of interest. In order to make a final determination, a woman will need to watch for the other nonverbal signals of

interest as discussed above.

The same rules can apply to a guy who always stares at a young woman in her school hallways, but never says hi. She may be unsure whether he likes her. It could be that he's just too shy to approach her or he might just be a naturally curious gawker.

How does she tell the difference?

Again, by watching for other nonverbal cues that indicate romantic interest or by non-verbally returning and encouraging his interest to see if he takes things a step farther.

When a man is NOT romantically interested in a woman he will:

- Display rigidity in his posture (the same as

a disinterested woman would)

- Cross his legs and/or arms when seated,

closing off his body to advances

- Avert his gaze so as not to encourage advancementBut to REALLY determine attraction levels and intentionsin people you already consider friends or associates(vs. strangers) you need to consider many additional factors. You see, because they are comfortable in each other's presence, friends of the opposite sex often give off flirtatious cues, even though they may have no romantic interest in each other.