There are a lot of stories out there that you hear about a woman getting pregnant and her boyfriend leaves her and the baby. There are a lot of questions that they may ask. What about child support? Do I have to put their name on the birth certificate? However, the one question that is out there that is rarely given an easy answer is, What do I do if the father has no interest and won't see the child or pay child support? I have this issue. My ex-fiance wanted a baby, and I ended up getting pregnant. Let's just say it didn't work out and I met someone much better.

My son's biological father was deployed when Zander was born. I let his sister, who lived a few hours south, know right away and she notified his family. He was born six weeks early so he ended up in the NICU. We notified him by the American Red Cross that Zander had been born. He said that he would come see Zander, however he never did. I asked him to send some sort of child support. I didn't ask for much. I told him even 20 dollars would help. He never even sent that. I would constantly write him emails and send pictures letting him know how Zander was doing. However, when I stopped writing them, he never called. It's almost been a year since there was some sort of contact with him.

Since I believe that it would be better for my husband to adopt him, we started looking into the adoption laws for a step parent. That's when we came across the voluntary abandonment.

What is voluntary abandonment?

It is where a parent of the child does not contact or support the child. If the parent has made no contact in any way for 6 months, it is considered abandonment and a nonverbal consent for a step parent adoption. A step parent can then file for adoption and depending on the state, the parent that abandoned the child may or may not have to be notified. If they are notified, they will be given a court date that they must attend in order to fight for custody although it will not look good on them for not supporting their child.

In my case, this was great news for me. However, a parent that may want their child could lose them without notification. You must be careful that you contact your child and pay some sort of child support in order to be sure that your case will not be considered voluntary abandonment.

Here is the information for California thanks to www.reliableadoption.com ...

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The grounds which typically justify the termination of parental rights in a stepparent adoption involve abandonment, failure to support the child, imprisonment, certain abuse, and other grounds. The grounds for the termination of parental rights is different for each state, but all states accept the grounds of abandonment and lack of support, and some states include other grounds.

In California, the absent parent has given implied consent to adoption or relinquishment pursuant to Section 26-10A-9 as outlined below:

1. The absent parent has abandoned the adoptee, failing to offer financial and /or emotional support for a period over 6 months from the filing of this petition.

2. The absent parent has knowingly left the adoptee with the other parent without provisions for support and without communication, or otherwise maintaining a significant parental relationship with the adoptee for a period of over 6 months from the filing of this petition.

3. The natural father failed to comply with Section 26-10C-1, which deals with the putative father."

This tends to be normal for most states.