Why Do Men Lie?
65Ok, ladies, I think I have seen it all, heard it all, and probably believed most of it. Yep, that's right, I think I am one of the most gullible people in the world. I'm not stupid, I just tend to not listen to my inner voice when it comes right down to it. I like to believe the good in people until they give me reason not to.
Men say "I love you", we all know why they say that one... right! Sex! Even myself, am able to spot that one.
They say, "I'll call you"... don't get me started on this one. I have no idea why they say this when they have no intention of doing it. I (as you know if you have read my obsessions hub) am certifiable if I don't hear from someone that says this one. I wonder if they have intentions of calling and forget, get busy, or something keeps them from it... but I've pretty much figured out, recently, that if they say it and don't. they probably weren't going to in the first place. I think for me, it is best that I just mark it down as a gender flaw and move on to the next piece of man meat.
Ok, are you ready for this one??? The biggest, fattest, lie I was ever told... "I will be there in about 15 minutes"... I drove for an hour and a half to meet someone, that was origionally supposed to drive that long to see me... after a few hours of waiting, he called me and told me that he couldn't make it and would like it if I could come to see him. I was excited, so I went. I got there, waited for an hour without hearing a single thing from him and finally he called me. Then he said "I will be there in 15 minutes".... I waited 3 hours. I drove all the way home in the middle of the night after being awake for 18 solid hours. On my way back, I kept trying to reason the whole thing out in my head.
Maybe he couldn't make it... (a ha but he has a phone. He could have called you)
Why isn't he answering his phone... ( he isn't answering because you've been duped)...
just a couple of the many questions running through my head at that time. I went from being upset, to really pissed off, back to upset again... then finally numb. He was probably sitting back at home, browsing myspace, laughing at me for being so stupid. And if that was the truth... That makes no sense at all.... why???
So, I can't really tell you why men lie. I know they say things to get what they want.... other times, it makes no sense to me when I can see no benefit for the lie they told... I know it should make we as women smarter. I hope I learn more from all this and keep myself from believing bullsh** in the future.
It is a shame that some men ruin the chances of the really good men out there. My question, what is the ratio of men full of shit to the men who are honest and forthcoming?
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Ok, I guess I should not have pointed the finger at the whole male gender, I apologize to you Tom and any other good man out there. This hub wasn't intended for you. And YEAH! thats what i'm saying. It could have all been avoided if he would have said, "listen, I can't make it to see you tonight, and maybe we can do something some other time." It would have been easier for me to handle if he would have just said what was on his mind. I can't handle not knowing. I over analyze every little detail and it isn't healthy.
amso sorry bb that someone had to do that to you... whatever reasonor excuse they might have for having stood u up, they need a hard knock on the head... if their was anything i could do to make no one ever hurts u again, i would, even without a second thought, because you are one of the "best everything people" ive ever met, u deserve better. sometimes we learn lessons the hardway, but its best when wedont ever forget them, because if we do, then the pai we suffered was in vain,all in vain. i know God will ake care ofyou, like he has always,he washes all of that away..and creates in us a clean heart, mends all that is broken. you will be okdear, thank you for being my bestest friend. big hug, ofcouse i love u more, so dont even get me started with that..lol
hy men lie... we dont, we just dont tell as its supposed to be...
Did you get my email...
Yes, I did, I just replied to it.
AND... men LIE... saying I will see u in 15 minutes and then not showing at all... is a LIE... LOL...
its not fee. its just a way to say: "I dont wanna be with you now. but we can have sex later"
The funniest lie my husband ever told me... he called to tell me he had left the lake a little later than planned but was definitely on the road and on his way home. Then a jet boat fired up right next to him. Busted!
LOL... yeah, ur probably right... but its still a lie
I bet he came up with another whopper to cover up that one.... he was listenin' to the boat race on the radio wasn't he... LOL
Randy: tell him he's a dork... he's messing up the brothers' image by not concentrating on his lying.
I got a great lie... no, a disguised story, but i'm gonna hub it later.
I'm ROFLOL, i see his face vivdly now with the noise in the back ground.
Waste of good lie anyway. I didn't care if he was coming home or not.
for how long was this poor guy excluded from "FUN"
What do you mean?
Female fruit, dummy(sex, fun, hitting jack-pot)
Oh! I never refused him. You obviously haven't read my panty hub Pauli, I was a good wife at least by Sunday.
Sorry Felicia for jacking you hub. LOL.
It's ok Randy, I don't mind. Glad to have the company here
To answer the title, and without having read the hub yet; in a nutshell - men lie to avoid drama, and, of course, many lie to get laid.
After I read this, I might have different answer.
OK, having read it, yeah, the "15-minutes" ass-hole was probably laughing at you for being so gullible. So stop doing that.
You described yourself as 'obsessive.' Stop doing that, too. It's a turn-off and it creeps most guys out - especially the nice guys.
I think the ration to us good guys (and yes I'm one of the non-liars) to ass-holes is probably 50/50. But one could also say the same thing about women. Trouble is, most of the nice guys aren't out there trolling because, well, they're nice guys. They have no interest in that. Same for women.
If you're bent on landing one of the ass-hole types, and lots of women are (go figure) act uninterested. For those types it's all about the thrill of the chase. But be warned, once they've bagged their prey, the interest is gone.
But then, I could be wrong ... I'm just a guy.
And PS: You're too young to have "seen it all." The best is hopefully yet to come.
Ok, I am obsessive, but not by choice. I have OCD. It is uncontrollable to a point and I try to explain it before hand so the shock factor isn't there. And I feel like I have seen it all, maybe it will get better as I get older, I hope not too old though, before I find a good thing. I have a hard enough time trying to figure myself out without the added pressure of figuring out others too. I wish it were easier. It makes my head hurt
I must say again; then stop doing that: Dump the "added pressure" of trying to figure others out. It's an exercise in futility.
Figure yourself out and everything else will fall into place.
I can think of very few things more attractive than a confident, independent woman who is comfortable in her own skin.
Not all men lie and to be honest women lie just as much if not more. I have been lied to by women so many times and trust me I am one genuine guy but sometimes you just think why bother, oh by the way I did like yer hub and you personally seem a lovely girl, enjoy yer weekend and dont let any guy mess you about and if they do tell me and I will kick their ass ; )
I think it is not just men who lie; in fact I do believe that women are better liers, maybe we don't lie as much but we are much better at it. Some of the most common women's lies are asking someone to tell a man on the phone that you are not available and telling a man that he is the best lover you had. And of course number one lie: your age and weight, what woman hasn't lie about them at least once :)
Ok ... Artisan Walker, I am comfortable in my skin ... i am a happy person, but again, its the OCD and i wish it were just as simple as "not doing that" LOL... i'd be in good shape if i could just stop.
I agree with you badcompany, women Lie too, it just seems in my experiences, men lie more about issues of the heart. I can't understand why men feel the need to lie and string us girls along. I don't like that :( .......... and I'm going to try to have a good weekend... old man meat gone... new man meat here i come... I'll let ya know how it goes badcompany... i might need u to get ninja on somebody... lol
Just whistle and I am there moi friend, and dont try and have a good weekend bloody well let yer hair down and kick the ass off this weekend ok. You go girl ok !
Yep :)
Men do lie and we both know it and bc is a liar as well so stay clear of his bullcrap, I am genuine though and I like you !!
Go get a life Cabingirl you really are so pathetic now butt out we are busy here.
Nice guy isnt he, hope you enjoy his company cause he is bad company !
Honestly, I haven't met a man yet that was truly genuine... I'll give him a chance... I like u both... Thanks for the fan mail... :)
I think you should rather say, why do people lie as I believe women lie more than men. When men lie it's usually to stop you from being hurt by their actions, but then it backfires when you catch them lying so you get hurt anyway. Women lie out of just plain nastiness and to protect themselves.
Cindy, you may be right, it is probably that women lie just as much if not even more than men, but I had to vent my frustration somewhere. I honestly know that women fib too... Everyone does.
I never lie...you can ask Elvis!
LOL Tom, I believe you :l
Well you have met a genuine guy now, that you will discover over time ; )
You talking about Tom or yourself, BC?
princessa made the best point of all you liars, women are better liars, men lie to cover our arses, women lie to either gain something or hide something, like BC
We are all liars, men are dorks, but for myself, I try to keep it to a minimum. I like who I am, and I want people to know the real me, no fronts.
Yes you are right, yet again, darn, i just can get the last word in against you xxx
Lying is lying!!! It really doesn't matter what gender you are. It really tells a lot about a persons character. The sad thing is that innocent people get hurt in it (children & adults). What makes a person think that lying is ok? Surely you know at some point you will be found out. How stupid are you? In the end the lyre is the one that really ends up with the short end of the stick. Jokes on you idiot!!!!
Hi feewemw!
Not only men lies, everybody including the priests! I have proof that priest lies!
Relationships are built on trust....when a man lies, he cannot be ever trusted! Guess what Feewewv? When a man lies to you just once and you find out....RUN!!
Any relationship without trust will not last long. Women are also as guilty as men when it comes to telling lies. Sometimes though they are not lies but expression of love to move the relationship further. Thanks for sharing.
Tom Rubenoff says:
7 months ago
Oh, it's not as gender specific as that, Felicia. :0) Although I think men are much more professional (or maybe the word is pathological) at it. When people lie, I have learned a strategy. 1) If there is any way it may not have been a lie, I chalk it up as a misunderstanding 2) If I am sure it was a deliberate lie I make sure never to fully trust that person because they were too immature at that point to tell me the simple truth. "No thanks, I don't want to come." Was that so hard?
I sympathize. Some people are just idiots.