Why Doesn't He Listen When I Tell Him I Need Him?

“My husband and I have been married for three years and we have a good relationship. He is a very low key guy and I love that about him. I, on the other hand am like the Energizer Bunny on speed. I just started medical school, I volunteer at an AIDS clinic and I am waitressing to help pay the bills.

My issue is this, my husband won’t help me with some things that I need to get done but don’t have time to do myself. I don’t know what it is because we really get along with each other, but he really resists me over this one thing. For example, I have to get my passport sent certified mail and he would have to actually go into the post office to take care of it for me. He doesn’t get that I don’t have time or energy to do this. I don’t think that is too much to ask. What do I do?” Kelly

Hey Kelly,

Thanks for your question. First of all, think about your everyday average connection with your guy. Are things usually pretty good? If yes, then something is blocking his view of your request. It is like he is glossing over and not hearing you. If you persist, he resists, right? Here is a fast working tool that I normally only share with my private clients.

Get a piece of paper and pen and fill in this sentence with as many different endings as you can:

The worst part of his not hearing me is_______________________________________.

The worst part about that is________________

And the worst part of that is _______________

Keep going and going and take notes on the thoughts that come to your mind. Questions like this asked reflectively will lead you to the exact right words to tap with.

You may feel energy in your throat and upper chest. I felt it just typing out the sentence. This is something that really hurts. Be especially mindful of any body sensation that you get. You can use your frustration with your husband to access some hidden emotional pain and that is good news. You will feel closer to him after you release some of the hurt. Even if you don’t know what your reaction is all about, you can still process through it. It is really easy to release the pressure around this issue with him and you will feel so much better.

Now you are ready to try EFT on your own. You can do this!

Just follow along:

While tapping on the Karate Chop point (remember you can learn all about tapping here: How To Tap ) Repeat:

Even though I am frustrated that he won’t help me, I completely love and accept myself.

Even though I am frustrated because he doesn’t see how exhausted I am and how much he could help me by taking care of this. It is such a small thing. Why can’t he take care of the stupid passport (or whatever)? Even though a part of me is really angry about this, I completely accept all of me anyway.

Even though a part of me is tired and feeling really neglected there is another stronger, wiser part of me that knows he loves me and that he just isn’t getting it right now.

Even though he is normally so sweet to me and I know for sure he loves me, I am a little disappointed in him right now and I feel awful inside. Even though that is true, I completely and profoundly accept myself anyway.

Now start tapping around the points (Eyebrow, side of eye, under eye, under nose, front of chin, collar bone point, rib point (lowest rib beneath the breast, under the arm and top of the head) reading your list of sentence endings from above. Let yourself go and say all the things that are running through your mind tapping away.

Some people are nervous because they don’t want to say the negative things that are in their minds for fear of manifesting them. No worries, the thoughts are in there anyway so you might as well get them up and out of you!

When you sense some relief, tap around the points one more time stating something you are grateful for about your husband at each point.

You have nothing to lose to try this. Keep it to yourself so you know for sure that any and all changes in your husband’s attitude are due to you tuning yourself to his mind, his way of thinking. When you take charge and diffuse your hurt energy, he will feel this change in you and things will be different. He can learn to get you but he is only going to learn that from you and your emotional energy says way more than your words do.

About the passport. I know that things are really tight for you right now and you have no extra cash, however, there probably is an undergrad at your school who would love to make a little cash on the side to run errands for you a couple of hours a week. Don’t pooh pooh this idea too quickly. If your husband truly does not want to help you and you can let that go. Hire someone. It will be an investment in yourself that will bear big benefits.

Good luck, Kelly, and thanks for writing in!

Self love is the only road that counts,

Keep tapping!

Catherine

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Catherine Behan, Mom, Grandma, Author, Teacher, Intuitive Guide, Spiritual Mentor and Mind Tuner is enjoying a dream come true renaissance life. Please visit http://www.NeverFearEFTisHere.com where you will find a complimentary download of a recent class (a $67 value).

Are you out of tune with your man? Did he used to be in to you but now you are not so sure? Were you sure he was your soul mate and now you are thinking, “What was I thinking?”

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