If I could have anything for my birthday, think it would be Corona with lime. I think a lot of people are ignorant to the joys of beer mixed with fresh fruit, but I suggest they wise up. The other night I consumed four, count e'm, four bottles of Corona, and along with them, an entire lime. And I can't tell you how my life changed instantly.

Suddenly, I liked my apartment more. I liked all the little nuances of my humble abode, including the dripping faucet, the old dusty radiator and the layer of filth on the inside of the window.

Also, I discovered that I can dance. I can dance like a stripper. In front of the window. In my pajamas. Really, I think it's the lime.

And most importantly, I discovered I was brilliant. Concepts that never made sense to me before suddenly became clear as day. And as I paced the room and muttered things to myself, I figured a lot of stuff out.

Side note: When I went to Mexico, I discovered that the Corona flowed freely. If I remember correctly, there was a river where locals brought buckets and for their daily supply of Corona. Nearby there were lime trees overflowing with that tasty, sour fruit.

Advice: If you go to a bar and order a Corona with lime, that lime will no doubt be dried out as hell. You should just avoid the hassle and buy yourself a 12-pack and a couple of limes and have a party back at your place. By yourself.

I hope I have properly educated you on my favorite treat, Corona with lime. I strongly suggest you go out and try it for yourself. And if you come back and tell me your life hasn't greatly improved, I won't believe you.