Why WOMEN Cheat

Men and women are so different, women feel things, men have to see things, women use reason, intuition, and emotion, men use excuses, opportunity, and their impulses. Women are sensitive, yet, we can take whatever men give us and act like it doesn't bother us, and before you know it... we seek revenge! Sure, we can be manipulative, conniving, as we use sex and guilt as weapons of mass destruction, but you would never know this by looking at us, wearing high heels, make up and a smile. Men have their own weapons, they can be cold, careless, and hold on tightly to their double standards. I asked 100 men four questions: "If your woman cheated on you, would you take her back?" 95 said NO. 3 said maybe, and 2 said it depends on the circumstances. I then asked these same men, "If you cheated on your woman, would you confess?" 89 said NO, 7 said yes and 4 said they would only if the girl they cheated with threatened to tell. My final question to these men was, "If you got caught, would you expect her to take you back?" 83 said YES, 11 said they would deny it and expect their woman to take them back, while 3 said they would move on to the next girl and 2 said they would expect her not take them back. My last question was to the 83 men who said that they would expect their woman to take them back and I asked, "If she took you back, do you think she would ever retaliate?" Most of them didn't even consider any type of retaliation, they just figured that "boys will be boys" and their girls would understand. The look of confusion was all over their faces, keep in mind I asked 100 random men of various ages, ethnic, economic, and religious backgrounds at a popular beach in San Diego, CA over Memorial Day weekend. These results may not be true everywhere, but they seem pretty typical of men.

When I talk to my girlfriends, old friends from San Diego, myspace buddies, previous co-workers, and other girls I network with, about cheating, they have a different take on things. Although most would argue that they would never take a guy back after he has cheated, most women have. It's how they handled the situation that surprised me. Not only has their response to cheating lovers shocked me, its all the other reasons they cheat that really surprised me! Over the years I have kept a gossip journal, and it is a thick one! I recently went through it and narrowed it down to10 reasons why women cheat. These results will shock you far more then what the men had to say.

TOP 10 REASONS WHY WOMEN CHEAT

10. The relationship isn't THAT serious. In the beginning, you may find yourself in a brand new relationship, you're just dating but you really like the guy but you aren't quite sure if you want to be exclusive, men, you better not take too long to figure it out and seal the deal. While you're out there dating or talking to a couple of other girls to make sure she's the right one for you, she could be doing the same thing! Unfortunately for you, women get hit on almost everyday, it could just be for sex or whatever the circumstance, but we get attention out there no matter what we look like-there is always someone who is willing to get in our pants. Fortunately, we have been turning men down since the beginning of time, so unlike you, the predator, we are the type of prey that can say NO and walk away. When you think you are not quite ready to settle down as you go from one woman to the next, you are really wasting time on the girls you don't really like instead of investing time in the one you really want. If you don't seal the deal while she's really into you, you just might blow it, and she knows it!

9. They are bored in the relationship. When women get bored with their man they may seek comfort in the arms of a stranger or an old familiar flame. They get bored when the sparks no longer fly, they are stuck in a routine at home or in the relationship, and if their man isn't paying attention to them or they aren't having anymore fun together. Women need romance, dancing, dinners, spontaneous getaways, anything that will keep them guessing and make them feel special. The longer you leave gaps in between the romance, some other guy may be fillin gin for you. When the man she loves is spending too much time and attention on himself or his other interests, it is a complete turn-off for women because we want to be the center of his world, and when we aren't, we know that someone else will place us on a peddle stool. You've seen the chick flicks guys, how much more do we need to spell it out for you?!

8. They aren't getting what they want out of the relationship. Most women want a place to call home, especially a house, they want a marriage or some type of commitment, and eventually, they want to start a family. If they have been in a long term relationship and nothing seems to be materializing from it, they will consider straying if they haven't already. Women need to know their place in your life, we want to know that you are in it to give them that happily ever after, and if you don't step it up, then you need to proceed with caution. It isn't about sex, it's about being with a man that is ready to GROW UP and take the relationship to the next level. No matter what we say, we need the ring, the piece of paper, the contract, the whole sha-bang! We don't want to be your baby mama, but if that's what it takes to get you to commit, then some women will take that route and make you miserable for the rest of your life, all because... you didn't give her want she wants or needs in the relationship. Remember guys, there will always be someone else out there that will promise her the world if you aren't already giving it to her.

7. When he has too much baggage. Psycho ex girlfriends, baby mama drama, ex-wives with too much control, a meddling mother, over-protective siblings, bratty kids and friends that don't know when to go home, will take their toll on a woman. There is nothing more unattractive then a man that has too much baggage. Women will begin to take a look at their options out there no matter how nice or great of a guy her man is. A man can spoil her rotten, treat her with love and respect, but if his mama always has something to say, if his parents drop by unannounced, or are rude when her man isn't around, she will begin to resent the number one woman in your life, her arch-enemy... Yo' MAMA! If your ex, baby mama, or ex-wife causes too many problems in your relationship, you better do whatever you can to keep her because that is some bull-stuff that she will only take for so long. What's worse is if you can't control your own kids, that is also a major turn off because she wants you to be the MAN, not the doormat! When your friends come over too much or stay too long, you're not doing couples activities and you're all just sitting around playing video games, that will make you all look like a high school boy instead of the man she knows you can be. If you seem to be fighting about other people in your lives, that is definitely a red flag that she is not happy, so schedule time with your friends or family and let her go do whatever she likes to do then meet up latter. Whatever you do, don't keep repeating the same thing over and over when she tells you she doesn't like something (or someone) take care of the problem like a man, don't keep irritating her. When you really love someone, you will make the simple effort to make little changes for the benefit of the relationship; its all about compromise. If a man has too much baggage, there will be a drama free man out there just waiting for a chance to be with her, especially if she isn't carrying much baggage of her own.

6. They won't leave something for nothing. When you're just not getting along and you seem to be fighting a lot, fellas beware! Most women won't have a clean break because we need to "get under someone new, to get over someone old." That's right, this is something even our mothers and grandmothers know now days! That is why we always tend to have a "rebound guy," you know, the guy after the serious long-term relationship, before the string of one night stands and mini-relationships that will eventually lead to the new and improved relationship with someone better then you. Don't be mistaken, women are a lot more slick then we have been given credit for, and you won't even see it coming. By the time you're ready to "work things out" she may be on to bigger and better things, so if you know you love her and want to be with her, you better fix the problems before you get replaced. We think about our feelings and emotions a lot before we stray or start looking for the rebound guy, by the time we act on it, we have made up our minds and moved on. All you need to know is that the plan was well thought out before it was executed.

5. Ok, sometimes it is about the SEX. If a girl is having trouble climaxing, no matter how great of a guy you are, or if you have a mortgage, lease or kids together, she just might stray, depending on how bad it is and how much she really loves you. You could be rich, offer her everything under the sun, but if you can't deliver the kind of lovin' she needs, you're headed for trouble, because there is an easy remedy to cure that little problem. You will find that more and more women will have a Cha-cha, a guy they can call on whenever, wherever, to take care of their sexual appetite. Unlike a booty call, a Cha-cha knows you're in a relationship, he might be in one too, but he is readily awaiting her number appearing on the Caller ID of his cell phone. He is the guy that will give her presents AND orgasms, but he never calls her, she calls him. Men have their "old reliables" that they call when they are having a dry spell, women do too, but the Cha-cha is a special man that takes care of her wants and needs in different ways then a booty call and an old reliable. He is also there when you aren't acting right, he will console her after a fight, even if she doesn't mention a word about it, and he is there if she hasn't lined him up already, if you are having any of the issues from 6-10 in addition to the bad sex. Women have sexual and emotional needs that require your attention and if you aren't giving it to them, someone else will without a doubt!

4. When things start to go sour. Let's face it, women need a lot of attention, we have feelings and emotions that run deeper then any of the seven seas in the whole wide world. If you forget her birthday, an anniversary, or any other special day or if you skimp out on the other important days like Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, Christmas, New Years Eve or WHATEVER, she will feel unappreciated and that is a major red-light danger zone! If you are so caught up and busy doing whatever it is that you do, even if you are working a lot to pay bills and what not, at the very least... you better remember the days that count! The rule of thumb here is that you need to show your appreciation to her, show her how special she is and how much she means to you. Say thank you in little ways, because every woman will tell you, "it's the little things that count." The reason the little things count is because they all add up to one big thing, whether or not you appreciate her enough. If she baby's you when you're sick, packs your lunches, makes you dinner every night, if she cuts your hair, or makes you feel special by throwing you a surprise party, or gets you little thoughtful gifts here and there, no matter what the occasion, she is doing her best to make you feel special, loved and appreciated. We will never say it out loud, but we're expecting you to do it for us too. Picking up some flowers "just because" is a great way to show her, taking her out for a romantic dinner will also do the trick, getting her a card to say you're sorry, or giving her a little something because you love her, will always work wonders. If not, there is always some guy out there that will give her the works and charm those panties off by sweeping her off her feet.

3. If the relationship gets physical, in a bad way. Don't think that you could ever completely control a woman. If you try to use scare tactics, if you hit her, beat her up, or threaten her, she can and will stray at some point, it is just a matter of when. If you are verbally or emotionally abusive, we may play the victim card but every woman can be pushed to her breaking point until enough is enough. There are way more nice guys then evil ones out there and if you didn't know this already, we have been trained to await our night in shining armor, thanks to Disney. You can beat us to the ground and we will pick ourselves up because even though we love you and you hurt us in anyway, there is always another guy waiting to save that damsel in distress. We all know how much women talk, we talk about everyone and everything, so if she's with friends or at work spilling her guts out to someone else, anywhere else, the other women will be more then willing to set her up with someone great that they know, and most guys would love to play the part of the hero.

2. When she doesn't come first in your life. If you put other people before her then she will eventually stray and find herself in bed with a guy that will put her first. A woman has to feel like she is your number one priority outside of your real responsibilities like work or school, since women can be considered your partner, she needs to be treated as such, and more. When you're spending more time or money on your Mom, or anyone else other then her, you will have some problems. If you spend too much time at work and not enough time on her, there will be a big fight around the corner. I know it sounds selfish, but that is just the way we are. Think about it, when a man has a little girl, he is over protective of her, he spoils her, and she is his princess forever. When Dad is around, she is on her best behavior because she knows that if she plays her cards right, she can get whatever she wants from him... Mom on the other hand, is different. Mothers and daughters have a different relationship, they teach us all the domestic knowledge we need to be a wife and mother, cooking, cleaning, taking care of kids, etc. Usually, the father will discipline, the kids, but he is always easier on his little girl then on his boys. There are Daddy's girls, and Mama's boys, there is a method to that madness. You see, mothers make it difficult for any woman to measure up because most guys want a girl kind of like his mom, in a way, and women want a strong, providing, generous man, like her daddy. Women just want a guy to make her feel like a princess, so if you've got other things on that peddle stool, you better make room for her because if she isn't your number one, she will belong to someone else in no time. It's not just about people either, it is also habits and addicitions, like drugs or video games, if you spend more time on the Playstation III or getting high, she will find a more mature man that will place that crown on her head and slip on that glass slipper.

1. Whatever you can do, we can do it better. If you have cheated on us and we take you back, you better be on your toes every minute of every day! Don't think you are in the clear just because she forgave you, you better watch how she interacts with your brother, your cousins, your best friends, co- workers, and anyone with a penis. She will go for the jugular fellas, and I am not playing! If you break her heart and she gives you a second chance, she is probably going to start plotting the biggest, heart-breaking performance of her life. Just when you think it's all water under the bridge, you will find your heart ripped out, stomped on and spit on, under that bridge. Every woman handles it differently, she will either go for someone close to you, or she will slowly but surely, be with someone else behind your back, whether you find out about it or not is up to her. She may take you back, all the while knowing that she has slept with someone else, because in the back of her mind, "what you don't know won't hurt." Trust me fellas, she will smile in your face and act like everything is normal, but behind that grin lies the remnants of a broken heart plotting away vengeance. You see, it is so much easier for a woman to cheat, all we have to do is say "yes". Men love the thrill of the chase, they are natural predators, and once they have a piece of the pie, they are done with it because the thrill of the chase is over. If they get caught it's because they weren't doing it right, they got sloppy, and weren't paying attention. Women on the other hand, are very detail oriented, if she gets caught, she probably wanted to. Women will sleep with a guy even if he has a significant other, we are competitive that way. If the girl you cheated on knew about your woman, she was in it for the competition, you really mean nothing to her; sorry guys. Women always think they are better then other women, even sisters are rivals, but you are the fool that gets caught in the middle. If you don't end up with one of the two, you will end up alone, because a woman doesn't really want the guy that cheats on his chick with her because he will probably do it to her too. The woman who got cheated on will either take you back and get you back to even the score, or she will not have anything to do with you. It's all a game, and most of the time... it's the men that play the fools.

I know this all sounds horrible, and you probably think that women aren't like that, but if you really believe that then you are naive. Women are not nice when you hurt them or don't treat them the way they deserve to be treated. They will strike when you least expect it, she will hurt you in away you never thought possible, and if she did it all because of some thing you did or failed to do, she will do it without a single regret. A woman scorned will do the impossible and the unbelievable; you will not be prepared for the atomic bomb she will drop on you. It could be days, weeks, months, years, but she knows she is in control and she will take her time to get you back. Let's go back to the beginning, remember how Eve convinced Adam to eat that apple? Well, that's the kind of power we have over men. Don't think for a moment, that you are special, men are disposable, sad but true. Anything you won't do for us, someone else will be more then willing to step up and take care of us, and that's the guy that gets the trophy wife. The self-absorbed, naive man, is still a boy to us, and what we really want, is a MAN. A woman will love you whole heartedly if you play your cards right, but if you don't, she will call your bluff and walk away with the pot, take your pride with her, and leave you all alone to figure out how the heck she pulled it off.