Why are Men so infuriating in Relationships?
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Don't get me wrong, I do love my Husband, but what makes me mad is not only some of his bad habits, but also the ones of men in my previous relationships. I have decided to make a list to see if all you women out there can identify with the problems men bring into your lives, and decide whether it is really worth all the hassle, or would you be better off being single? In other words, do the pro's outweigh the con's???
1) Snoring. Now if you are anything like me you will find that trying to get to sleep after your Husband/Boyfriend has had a skinful of beer, (and is snoring enough to bring down the Statue of Liberty), is impossible, and is enough to make you seriously consider murder. No matter how many times you kick them on to their side, or thump them in the head to stop the snores, they still roll back into a position where they snore like a stuck pig. Few irritations in life make me feel as close to being willing to endure a jail sentence as a snoring male.
2) Men who lie about where the money they spend in the pub comes from. Yes, you know the ones. They are the guys that seem to spend every night in the pub, whilst the bank account is overdrawn, yet they claim the spending money came from other sources, even though you know that if they did procure money from another source, the bank account needed it more than the pub did!
3) The man who promises to get certain jobs done around the house, but instead, delays them day after day until a row is caused because of his lax attitude.
4) Men who are impatient with your pets. These men simply don't understand that pets are family! They shout at them, (in my ex's case try to strangle them, see my hub: http://hubpages.com/hub/My-Ex-was-a-Control-Freak ), and generally treat them as animals, even though we think of them as family.
5) Men who are unfaithful. Why is this? A lot of the time it seems they are in perfectly happy relationships, but can't say no when a pretty girl gives them the eye. Is it a male ego thing, the excitement of doing something illicit, or simply there is a problem in the relationship they are in, in which case, why don't most of them ask their wives to go for counselling with them before they resort to being unfaithful?
6) Men who always want sex when you don't, in other words, right in the middle of your favourite TV programmes, or when you have just finally dragged yourself out of bed in the mornings, and then they sulk when you say 'no thanks'. Yes, men can sulk better than any child, especially where sex is concerned, and they somehow manage to make you feel guilty for the timing being inconvenient, and the fact you would rather wait until a more suitable time.
7) I know, back to the sex topic, but I so hate it when men want/expect you to have all sorts of wayout kinky sex after you have been together for ages. Fine, when you first get together, you can do all the fun dressing up thing for him, but after a few years this novelty has worn off, and normal sex is great, without the acrobatics.
8) Skid marks, OMG I hate these so much. Nothing makes me pick up a pair of underpants with tweezers more than this. Why oh why don't men do what women do, in other words, check the toilet paper each time you wipe? If you do this you can see if you have wiped clean, and if not, keep wiping until you have a clean wipe, or have a wash with a flannel and soap afterwards.
9) Men who insist on trying to 'put you down' in front of your mutual friends, and underestimate your intelligence. If you are like me this won't work, as most people will recognise the truth is that you are the brains in the partnership, and he only makes himself look small.
10) Men who claim to be unavoidably attractive to women, yuk. This is rarely true, and is just wishful thinking. Have you watched them in the pub? Not many women give them a second glance, and the men tell you this more to convince you to put up with them than because they have a queue of women just waiting for you to dump this man.
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Great Lela, so glad you understand where I am coming from :)
:) Finally! It seems I've hit the jackpot with Husband V3.0. None of these apply. That doesn't mean he's perfect...just that none of these apply. He has unique annoying traits. LOL!
You are soooooo lucky Spryte :)
Misty coming from the other side (so to speak) my comments would be this:-
From what you have written your method of choosing your male partner needs a complete overhaul. Is there a shortage of men in Guernsey ?
I don't think I've left a skid mark since I was oh probably 3 or 4years old. Yuk. Just put the dirty undies in the trash bin every time. When he runs out of undies he might, just might, get the message. Or not!
Your point no 9 surely answers itself, the belittler becomes the belittled?
So true Misty although its to be taken serously i had a good laugh at your hub great stuff. Since we all have faults , i guess it depends on what faults of our partners we can put up with and live with. I know my husband had a few ,
Hi agvulpes, thanks for stopping by and commenting. LOL, no it isn't the Guernsey men specifically, actually many of the examples I have quoted date back to when I lived in the UK in Kent. Number 9 is a good point, as it does often end up backfiring on them. As for my methods of choosing men needing a complete overhaul, I think you could be right, although not quite sure I want to be delving through the dirty linen basket of my future mate to see if they have skid marks on their underwear or not, (actually my Husband isn't guilty of this one thankfully) :)
Hi Yvonne, thanks for commenting and glad you enjoyed the hub. Yes, I guess it does all come down to whether or not you can put up with the faults and if their good points outweigh the bad ones. :)
I was diggin Misty, I really was but I have to say that spryte already answered how I would honestly have to.
Fair enough Dottie, there have to be a few good ones out there after all. Thanks for popping by :)
LOL you probably forgot the ones that dare to be clued to their computer/tv screen right when you finally feel like having sex with them :P
Fun hub, Misty. :)
I can't help but try to defend my fellow man on as many of these as I can, just because, well, I can't find the motivation to go work on the story I'm working on right now. /sigh So:
Chicks snore too. Some don't know they do, other's deny it. It's very difficult to hear yourself snoring.
Women lie about where the new clothes come from.
Women don't get stuff done around the house too (ok, I confess, this one is probably a matter of percentages and if anyone checks the math, probably falls into the insignificant percentile, but, I bet no one will, so I'm tossing it up there lol).
Some guys actually do think of pets as animals. You need to find this out early on. Another thing to watch out for is treating your pet with more attention than your husband. Not saying you do it, but if some guys get jealous of new babies, imagine how they might feel watching a mutt get lots of enthusiastic loving when the wife comes home and he only gets a nod, or even nothing at all. (Probably a symptom of bigger problems, takes two to Tango etc., but hey, I'm just tossing it out there).
All the sex ones are just complicated relationship stuff that definately fall into the "Takes Two to Tango" category, but I will say, cheating is kind of the bullshit solution to a problem. I tend not to be to sympathetic with males or females who cheat. It happens, but, meh. Ugly stuff there. So cruel.
Skid marks, some of this is probably due to laziness, but some is also due to the excess hair that resides in a man's, uh, crevice as it were. Sans getting in there with a wet cloth, regardless of how many passes are made with dry TP, the potential for, erm, leftovers is high for some guys. Finishing up the paperwork, so to speak, and seeing it clean is not an indicator of a skid-free future. One good sweat and the, uh, canyon walls begin to erode, sending moisture back down into the crevice valley... sort of thing. Anyway...
The last two on your list, just, yeah, those kinds of guys are mostly losers.
Misha, that is a good one, however it is usually me that is glued to the computer screen rather than him :)
Hi Shades, thanks for popping by and commenting. Agreed. many women do snore too, (although I doubt most of them are as earth shattering as the men's snores I have experienced).
Lying about where clothes come from is not one I am personally guilty of, mainly because I detest shopping and avoid it until I absolutely have to.
My Step-Dad does actually get jealous of my Mum's affection for her dog, so I can see why a man might feel a bit threatened, however, the dog doesn't argue with you, or do any of the above things that wind us women up, so it is no wonder the dog often gets more attention :)
Totally agree on the cheating thing, it isn't fair the hurt it causes the other person when the truth comes out.
LOL re-skid mark comment. I so loved the expression 'leftovers', makes it sound like the scrapings from your dinner plate at the end of a meal. Yukky thought about the 'sweat eroding the canyon walls' too. Perhaps men could try to use one of those women's hair removal creams in their crevice, e.g. Nair or Imaac, as this would leave them baby smooth and allow for easy 'debris removal'.
Last two on the list, yep, definite losers I agree.
I wrote a poem called "Flowers of the Valley" once about assorted issues with hygeine in the male ass crack, but I think it would be just one step over the line for HP lol. I was tempted to put it here lol, very close. Whew. I'm better now.
Oh I so wish you would post it anyway !!
#2 - Finances is a big one. Many relationships start going downhill because people cannot agree on how the money should be spent. I am very conservative about money so a man that was lax about spending will really tick me off no matter how attractive he is otherwise. But I think this issue is more of a compatibility thing rather than a failing of the weaker gender. :)
Very interesting points. You could write a hub on each of them.
Thanks Aya, you made all very good points and I too find men who are rubbish with money infuriating, possibly because I used to be like this myself, but luckily sorted myself out over the years and am now very good with money. I would write a hub on each of these issues, problem being I might come over as being a bit of a whinger if I did, and I don't want people to think all I ever do is complain. Really pleased you stopped in and commented. :)
It's BS, narrow-minded stuff like this why guys like me either want to stay single or marry a decent woman abroad.
You are of course entitled to your opinion Mike, and of course many women who have experienced the kind of problems I have listed could say that it is for reasons like those that they prefer to stay single or find a decent man abroad.
I'm sure if asked, your mate could rattle of a few of the thing he puuts up with from you as well. What you should then realize is that there is wide ranging personality triats in both sexes and you could probably find someone more suited to your compatibility. Also, we all need to be honest with each other is you have to complain to others online your not being open and honest enough with your partner and therefore doing you both an injustice. Talk to him about these issues and let him know what's really important to you, and listen to what's important to him. Compatibility is the key not finding Mr perfect.
Sorry about the spelling :,(
Hi Don, thanks for commenting. What is worth reminding readers of this hub is that these traits do not all relate to my current Husband, and actually he exhibits very few of these apart from the snoring and the money handling issues. It is ex boyfriends of mine who I am mostly describing, hence why they are my ex-boyfriends, and not my current partner. Cheers :) Please remember too, that this is a humorous Hub, and I am sure a man could write an equally humorous one about 'Why Women are so Infuriating in Relationships'.
Men don't need to write it. Everyone knows women are infuriating. Even women know they are infuriating. Writing it would be the pinnacle of redundancy. lol
:P
Oh, go on Shades, if anyone can write it you can!!!!! :) :) :)
I'm scared of girls. I ain't writin' it. What if they come try to get me afterwards and make me pay?
Lucky you, it may be more fun than you think :) :) :)
No acrobatics in the bedroom? No wonder that trapeze didn't go over so big with my wife.
Nice work Misty!
I have to admit that I snore. I wake myself up snoring and blame it on my husband. Guests in my home have gone sleepless and now stay in hotels when they visit =o
Men who are unfaithful...grrrrrrrrrrrrr, that's the only thing worse than skid marks. However, now that Shade has given such a vivid picture of why that happens, I can't be upset over that anymore. That can be fixed with a good waxing. :)
LOL @ Spryte...husband V3.0!
Oh Christoph, I can't begin to imagine you gently swinging backwards and forwards from the ceiling on a trapeze, your poor wife, no wonder she wasn't too keen :)
Thanks Pam, I dread to think of the pain waxing in that particular spot would cause for a man. Must try it on hubby very soon to test my theory :)
HI MISTY :0)
Well let me see..I don't watch TV....we have breakfast together every day and share cooking....We talk about everything and hold no secrets and neither one of us snores yayayayayayayayay and best of all we don`t point fingers or play the blame game!!! we just look at what happened and try to find a solution and if not let it go..to be honest i have never been this happy and content...its pretty awsome actually and we are are going through a dry fianical period too and thats is what most couples argue over Money...but the most important part and i believe the glue of our realtionship is we pray about everything...no we are not perfect ...but live in reality and have dumped the junk from the past..big key issue there :0)
Great Hub Misty Girl...later Mike:0)
Oh Mike, if only you were single, or even a polygamist :)
Misty!!! Are you really serious you had a relationship with someone who claimed to be "unavoidably attractive to women"?? Pshaw.
As to your current man troubles, look at it this way: If your man still wants to have sex with you at all, and it doesn't involve your pet or the two of you and another woman, you're ahead of the game, girlfriend! You could assign him laundry duty in exhange for his pub money (that way he gets to deal with his own skid marks). Or you could start looking around the pub yourself. Think any of them is any better?
LOL, thankfully my Husband isn't one for the skid marks, and he does most of our laundry anyway. Yes, an ex of mine did think he was unavoidably attractive to women, (see my Hub: http://hubpages.com/hub/My-Ex-was-a-Control-Freak )
All in all I got rid of the worst of them, and my current hubby is pretty good really, and certainly doesn't want sex with our pets, or a threesome with another woman, although he constantly wants it with me. Perhaps I am luckier than I realise!!!!
Thanks for commenting :)
I found this a very good read and I did chuckle a few times. I think it only applies to some men.
I will have a look through some of your other postings!
Thanks highprofile, I agree it only applies to some men, although a few of the problems seem to occur more frequently than others LOL. Thanks for stopping by and commenting. :)
ok, I am guilty of hiding shoes, and snoring, like shades said, but I have always hid shoes and the snoring started after I started taking sleeping pills, they knock the crap out of me. I love my husband and think his flaws are few and the flaws that he has are kind of cute. I am really a very lucky woman.
I think that it is about finding the person you love and sometimes we overlook the flaws they have if they are not too major. I wouldn't fall in love with someone who was cruel or lied, what's to love about that.
I agreed with shades also on the skid mark thing, they can't help it. I wash my husbands and my sons underwear and they are skidded, I just try not to look. Those hair removal creams are not a good idea, they can give chemical burns, you know that can't be good in that region. OUCH!
I so agree with your thoughts on loving someone in spite of the flaws, but like you said, if they are cruel or liars then who wants to love them?
I suppose waxing the crack could be another option, Double OUCH!
yes, that sounds painful. I just had my eyebrows waxed yesterday and it hurt. I can't imagine having your butt cracked waxed. makes me cringe.
Safer than trying to shave it though :)
oh, razor burn. Ouch again.
First off much of what you list I wouldn't consider to be habits and if they are why would you even be in such a relationship? Snoring, for example, is more of a condition, which I'd like to point out is something women are also afflicted with! Men who lie, are unfaithful, or purposely put you down in front of others and do so habitually, are not men and anyone would be crazy to live with someone of such low moral character. Now sex, is another matter! Any woman that refuses the amorous advance of her man because she doesn't want to miss a TV program should not be surprised if he goes to the pub, spends money he doesn't have and is unfaithful! You have no understanding of men if you think that all we want is sex! We don't just want sex, we want love and sex is how we express our love for you so when you reject our sexual advances you are in essence rejecting our love for you so naturally we're going to sulk! If you simply aren't in the mood at the time at least make a plan for when you can enjoy a tryst and reassure your man that you love him. Now skid marks are no fun for us guys either and it's certainly not something we do on purpose! I suppose we could stop wearing undershorts!
God, why do people take this hub so seriously, it is meant to be humorous, not an attack against men. Lighten up !!! I never said women were saints!!!
Lela Bryan says:
14 months ago
YES!!!
11. Complaining about me not picking up one thing when he has a thousand more things to pick up than me....
12. He has no interest in going to my reunion at all and can't figure out why I am not interested in going to his...
whew I fell better now
Thanks for the hub....