Guys are inexplicably drawn to women in any sort of sexual connection even if they have to conjure it up. Just the way they are hard-wired. If a couple of women are holding hands, it's automatically a Lesbian gesture. And God forbid we should hug or kiss on the lips!

As a long-time "girl", I've hugged, kissed and held hands with many women. I never thought that any of that was sexual, but, then, I'm a girl and I understand that the closest thing to me is another woman who feels my emotions, understands my moods, and can validate anything I'm saying. We're hard-wired to be sensitive to each other.

When I see my friends after a short absence, we always hug and never part without a kiss, usually on the cheek. We tell each other that we love one another and it isn't just words. Our friends are so precious to us. I've seen two of my young granddaughters treating their friends the same way. It's a girl thing and I'm thrilled that we have the open honesty to express our heart-felt love for each of our friends. Oddly, we may not be quite so demonstrative with the men who are also our friends unless we perceive them not to be sexually interesting. Trust me, if we are sexually interested in a man he'll know it and we'll show it.

This leads us to the different types of love one can have. The intimate love of a sexual nature is pretty obvious and for the sake of this writing doesn't need dissection. But there are two other types of love. There is love for one's siblings and parents and then the love for one's friends. Filial love for family members is shared from the earliest of reckonings. Babies love their mothers by smell and sound and taste. They recognize her from the time in utero. Same with fathers and those who were around during gestation. A deep chord of love binds siblings - I did not say "like" because I know plenty of sibs that would rather not be in the same room with each other.

Then comes the love of friends. They fall between family and lovers and are generally of a longer lasting tenure. Family drifts apart to a certain extent once children outgrow the nest. Parents age and take on very different qualities other than the original caregivers. Lovers come and go. Once gone, who rushes in to fill the gap for women? Why it's our girlfriends.

Here we are a weepy mess, haven't showered in ages and certainly couldn't find our make-up or hairbrushes, nor do we care to. Our girls are there to make tea, offer tissues, pour a drink, paint our nails, take us out shopping, and hold us close while we grieve our soul crushing break up. Only our girlfriends are ready to switch from the notion that the one who is now conspicuously absent and may very likely have been "the one", to confirming, "all men are dog meat". That's girlfriend loyalty. God help this man if he tries to return the scene of his crime because the girls are on duty and won't let him take any more shots at their beloved.

If we are truly hurting our girlfriends will climb up on our beds of pain and cuddle us. This doesn't turn us into Lesbian lovers, but it confirms that we need the closeness of being held, and they are the ones who give it whole-heartedly. When a woman has lost her spouse to death, the other widows close round about her and she is one with them. You can't imagine how comforting that is. To the newly widowed woman who must of course work through her grief, it is like a course in Devastation 101 to know that there are those who will council her as she tries to find her way in life again.

Men often wonder if we are drawn to stated Lesbian women. I had a young friend once whose husband shot himself to death. She had two beautiful daughters and we women were there for her during her family tragedy just as you would expect. A couple of months later I attended a birthday party for one of her little girls when the front door burst open and another women came in, flung a casual "hi" toward us, and bounded up the stairs. Something turned on a light bulb in my head and I wondered to myself if my young friend knew this woman was a Lesbian. My first encounter, you understand, so I had some sorting out to do.

After thinking about it, I knew that my friend was still my friend. I now understood the story that had caused her husband to kill himself, and my heart grieved for her knowing she would carry this burden forever. I also knew that I still loved her just as much as I always did and that her sexuality made no difference to me. I was in no way afraid she saw me in a sexual manner either. I just knew she loved me the same as I did her and none of the sexual implications were a part of that quotient.

Just to put the men at ease, women are women. They are either drawn to men or to other women. Women can't be just a little bit Lesbian, because you either are or you aren't. All that hugging and kissing and handholding you observe amongst we women is just part of our wonderful nature. For us it is normal. If men acted the same way they'd be branded from the first touch. That's why when men hug they've got to slap each other on the back and make sure the hug is not too long. Just to clinch the deal that they are 100 percent hetero, they often end these gestures with weird little knuckle bumping that's as sure a sign of masculinity as if they had peed on a post.

If men understand their guy thing, then they should make a little room in their minds for girl things too. It's just a sign of affection and love and should never be over analyzed. Wouldn't hurt if they were emulated though.