Why do people fall in love?
80Well, this story started around 2 years ago. The economic boom in India was at its peak and I was making some extra pocket money. So me and my friends used to go to watch movies in the multiplex often. One day, a similar plan was made by one of my friend. Only this time, he said that a girl, whom I knew, was going to accompany us. He didn't reveal her name at first. He gave me hints like she was from our school, was one of the most beautiful and hottest girls in our class and what not. I took all the names that I could remember from my school class but all turned out to be wrong.
Then finally, knowing that I would'nt be able to guess it, he disclosed it. I was actually shell shocked to hear the name because I never expected it in the first place. I mean, we never even talked in the school and now all of a sudden she was coming for a movie with us. So that kind of sounded weird. My friend told me that they talked online and came up with the plan. I didn't take the pains of asking him how? when? n other questions because honestly, I was really excited to meet her. As far as I remember, she was indeed very beautiful back in school and I wanted to see if she was more beautiful now or not. And all this planning and stuff took place in a days time.
Then, the next day I kind of woke up earlier than I normally do on the thought of meeting her. My friend called me up and told me the meeting point. From there we were going to take a taxi to the mall. I confirmed on the phone if she was coming and he was positive. I left home for the meeting point. As I got closer, I was trying to get a glimpse of her. My height being average, I tried to get a glimpse by jumping. I couldn't see her nor my friend. I was so frustrated at my friend because he never comes on time. I thought atleast today he would have the courtesy to come on time because we were going to have a girl with us. But this guy will never improve. I waited at the meeting point and after 5 or so minutes they came. I looked at her and Oh boy!! she was beautiful. May be the most beautiful girl I had seen till date. We greeted each other and then we got into a taxi. On the way to the mall, I asked her about her whereabouts and stuff. Being a little more than shy I was kind of finding it hard to get a conversation going on. May be she understood that so she used to always find something to talk. We watched the movie and then had a burger at McDonalds and got back home. We exchanged our cell phone numbers on the way back. In the evening I sent her some friendship messages and she replied me with some. Then in the night when I was talking to this friend of mine, he suddenly asked me if I liked her. I didn't know the answer to that question but I was more inclined to a 'yes'. A few days passed, we didn't really meet each other. We were just exchanging some occasional calls or messages. Then one day a plan came up to go to a movie again. My friend told me to ask her if she was coming. She agreed. So we were on our way to another movie. That day I realized that I was falling in love with this girl. That night we both were chatting online. I confessed my love to her. I don't know what her facial expression was, but she sounded like she gets this very often. She didn't give me a clear No for an answer but wanted to be friends with me. I was cool with the idea and decided to move on.
Days passed, we used to talk more often on the phone and online. Then we started sharing our past with each other. She told me about her past relationship with a guy which ended around a year ago. She told me about him and all the talk n all they used to have with each other. I came to know that her break up was not a mutual one. The guy somewhat began to behave weird suddenly and one day told her that he couldn't take the pressure any more. According to my judgement, they must have got serious in the relationship and he couldn't take the pressure. So I kept listening to her. She asked about my past relationships. As I had never been in a relationship before I had nothing much to share. She asked me why so shy I was when talking to girls. You know I actually was not able to look the girls in their eyes while talking. Eventually, living in the same locality, we used to meet and talk often. She started sharing almost everything with me and so did I. I used to confess my love to her in between but she would always give me a calm nod and would tell me that she didn't want to get in a relationship just yet. I always respected her choice and never forced her for anything. It's been two years now since we met and we are best friends.But some times she gets memories of her ex-boy friend. As she is not with her anymore, it doesn't matter to me. But the moment she starts crying over it, I get really irritated. I mean, its frigging 3 years now. Maybe she was deeply in love with that guy, but 3 years is a very long time. I couldn't even shout at her for this. So I just listen to what she has to say about her feelings. She says she has got over it but is not able to forget that guy. She has not even been in contact with this guy for 3 yrs, haven't met in 3yrs then too she is not able to forget him. A few days ago, she met him and they talked for some time. Later that day she called me up and told me about it. She said that he talked very well with her and that she was having some mixed feelings about him. She said, she thought he still liked her. She came to know from him that he was about to leave for USA in a month's time to do his Masters(MS). She asked him if he could meet her before leaving India and he agreed. He told her that he would call her later and talk as he was in a hurry. She asked me if she should call him. Knowing the fact that he didn't make any contact with her for such a long time, I asked her to wait for him to call. And boy I was right. He didn't. After a few days she was restless because of this and asked me if she should call him. I couldn't see her that way so i agreed. She called him up but he didn't answer the call at first. She started crying saying that he always does like that and that he should tell her in the face if he didn't want to talk to her. But I disagreed and asked her to call again. This time he answered the call only to tell her that he was busy and that he would call her back later. She told me that he will not call her back and it turned out to be true. I told her to get the real picture and accept the fact that he didn't want to talk to her. I thought like she was OK with it and we both moved on. Then some days ago, they met again accidentally. He seemed to be in a hurry so he told her that he would call her atleast before leaving for USA. I told her to be patient and wait. Two days ago, she met a common friend of their's. She came to know that he left for US in the last week. She called me up and was literally crying her eyes out. She was cursing him like anything for not keeping his one promise. She said that she didn't want to get back with him or stop him from going or anything, she only wanted to bid him a final bye. I was really disappointed and disheartened by this act of that guy. I have never seen such a cowardly act by any one. She spent two years with this guy, truly committing herself to him and this is what she gets in return.
At this point, I asked myself, Why do people fall in love?? I didn't really have an answer to that question, as I had fallen for it too. Maybe there are questions which do not have answers. May be things are just meant to be.....Waiting for the day she gets over this and lives her life to the fullest.
PrintShare it! — Rate it: up down flag this hub
Comments
Wonderful Hub forever!!
Thanks.
Thanks alwaysabridesmaid..
hey great hub. y dont u read mine and tell me what u think? and then there is another one at roseandab.blogspot.com. thanks
that's a natural feeling people do fall in love as everybody need someone to fulfill there emotional needs.
anyway great story.
that's a natural feeling people do fall in love as everybody need someone to fulfill there emotional needs.
anyway great story.
ya rite....thnx kunika
Wow!! interesting topic.....
Thanks.
Very good info..
Thanks..
WOW REALLY GOOD HUB..REALLY DEEP. MAKES ME WANNA CRY =[ IM KIND OF GOIN THROUGH SOMETHING LIKE THAT EXCEPT HE STILL CALLS OR TXTS EVERY NOW N THEN THATS WHAT MAKES IT HARD FOR ME..BUT ANYWAYS GREAT HUB I LOOK FOWARD TO MORE =]
hi.
your story sounds very familiar. i was able to relate to it a lot. i guess its hard to understand what love is until you get your heart broken, at least thats how i learned what love is or my beginning to understanding what it is. best wishes for your friend and you as well :]
thnx molly....best wishes to u too....
Sweet hub! I feel love comes to us in different ways...sometimes with an end we we're not expecting. Some are just lucky enough to find love when the time and person is right for them. Just my theory on it; having been hurt in the past. Never give up hope...there is always someone for somebody. : )
I do not think that it was love. I think that she was insecure and was holding on to him when she should be more confident within herself. You are a good friend. Did you fall in love with her by chance?
Usually friends fall in love. they have good understanding and many qualities matches with them. Same has happened here too.
We never know when love is come , enjoy and do the best when it come to us
Hi Good Hub.............any ending of the story.
by the river..........
I find myself in a similar situation of the person I love being completely enwrapped in a past relationship. Even though he is actually over her at this point (which was not the case when we first met three years ago), their relationship completely warped his sense of relationships and mostly his sense of self. I understand the painful need to ask WHY, but you might also view your story as a warning, that each relationship we have shapes the rest, in friendship, love, and even hate (or dislike). Maybe your relationship with her will eventually shape how she views relationships and learn how to recognize and unworthy man.
FALL IN LOVE....I'd rather FALL in...CHOCOLATE;) No really, Falling in love is something that happens to us, a chemical thing that is usually based on the physical attraction we get for someone. When the chemical reaction wears off (and it almost always does) the hormones settle down and we are left to Love on purpose and more than just physically. The unconditional loving sets in after a lifetime of loving on purpose. The reason relationships don't last today is instant gratification is the name of the game, and people want that out of control feeling all the time. It becomes an addiction. We have fooled ourselves into believing that if we don't feel outta control than we must not be in love anymore. It's a lie and we are cheating ourselves out of the security of true love. Love is not something that happens to us, Love is something we do, we give something of ourselves to another, mostly our time, our patience, our understanding, our forgivness ect. Maybe we call it "Falling in love" so we don't have to take responsibility for our actions. It's something that just happened to us. Falling was uncontrolable...
Yes.....I'm in love with her....I just can't let go off her.
Well....there is no actual end to the story because the story is still on. I'm trying to support her to my best and keep her happy. Lets see how things turn out..
Best wishes for you
hey nice hub , i wish u all the best !
People want a witness to their life. They want someone they can go back to in fifty years and say 'Remember that'. That's my guess at least...great hub!
Steelbreeze: Don't be so naive! Truth is, she kept some level of communication with him during the 2-3yrs, thats how she finally met up with him & why she never got over him - He was still in the picture! Trust me on that one!
Step up & get the girl already! Quit waiting for her - You waited 2-3yrs! That was good because now you have a close friendship & she trusts you, but its time to move ahead - Take it to the next level. You'll never be together if you keep waiting. She'll only get over him when she's focused on you! Go get er', man! - I have an article on this exact topic, I really want you to read it, so stop by & check out!
@ Taylor
Thank you very much for the advice. I will definitely do something about it.....Thanks again
There will always be that one person you will always love that you just can't forget about. For her it was him and to the sounds of it she was never over him. Love is blind, and we will keep loving someone even if people just don't get it. You just can't help these feelings. As I was reading this I was expecting for you to get the girl in the end but was sad when I learned you two are still not together.
Some people fall in Love because they are experiencing Love with another person....others fall in Love because they feel it is something they need do at some point in life for whatever reason they conjure up!
vonda G. Nelson
YES I FALL IN LOVE BUT I TRY NOT TOO!
YOU GET HURT AND THEY DONT LOVE YOU ANYWAYYYY!!!!
SO I DATED OFTEN WITH DIFFERENT MEN AND WHEN I THOUGHT ABOUT FALLIN IN LOVE WITH HIM, I CUT HIM OFF COLD TURKEYYY BABYYY LOL...
BUT IT'S BEEN ALMOST 3 YRS NOW AND THE NEED FOR LOVE IS ON THE UP SALE FOR ME NOW,,,
YOU SEE WHEN YOUR A PLAYER, YOU DONT GET THAT LOVINGGG FEELINGGG OR TRY NOT TOOOO,, AND YOUR HEART AND SOUL WILL WEIGH ON YAAA VERY HARD, FOR ME ANYWAY, BECAUSE I WAS ALWAYS A LOVER AND SOULMATE TO HAVE LOVEEEE!!!
BUT I HAVENT FOUND THAT ONE TO BE CLOSE TO YET,, MAYBE IT'S JUST MY FAULT NOT LETTING IT IN. I DONT KNOW, BUT
I HOPEEE IT COMES SOON, CAUSE IM VERY LONELY AND SAD AND NEED THAT LOVER AND FRIEND BACK IN MY LIFE IF YOU CAN FEEL ME ON THAT ONE...PEOPLE READING ME!!!
Hi.... really a nice post. Seems so true. I am a very shy person and i always said il never fall in love. Then a guy came in my life and changed it. Initially i just hated him but since 3 months my college got over and i miss him. He broke up from his ex some months back but still loves her. this is what i think.I do message him to move out of the past and try to support him but have never confessed this to him. Now i feel breaking off from this due to the distance between us. He says he is scared of me nd never takes my calls. So now i think i should move on and never call him again...
I'l be happy if someone would give a suggestion..
Hey karen.Sorry to hear that. If I were you, I would give it one try. Try talking to him once. Not about his love life but about his day to day life. See how he takes it. If that doesn't go well then I guess its best for you to move on. Guess there is someone else out there for you. :)
Nice love story buddy. I should agree here that I am also a bit shy about talking to the girls, but your story proved to be an inspiration. I will try to tell my feelings to the girl I like.
@abentley...
Nice to hear that man. I am happy that I could be of some help.Take care.
hi steelbreeze, first of all I want to tell you that from your true story there is only one thing that amazes me: YOUR wonderful soul. You give up your own ego, your own needs, and love her for her, and not for yourself. That tells me everything about you. I already love you only for that :D
Taylor's advice sounds very true for me. But also I would like to underline the fact that even if she would try to forget him and actually be with you, and she may even be with you all your life, she wouldn't be completely with you, and she wouldn't be completely happy anyway. And you would feel that the the years coming. Would you like that?
There is another secret that we always forget or prefer not to consider: the chemical attraction: usually the chemical reaction that makes female and male bodies attract dissipates in about 2 years. You may be at the end of the falling-in-love period, you may be able to get over her, and let her free to find somebody who she would really fall in love with. She could get over him if she would met few guys (I am sorry to be so cruel, but that is the truth).
I think the future reserves for you one of the following:
1. a happy friendship, or
2. a sad marriage
Hi SteelBreeze, I would strongly advise you to get married soon - preferably ask your parents to find a good match. I don't think this girl will cherish your love to the end because there's something else that fascinates her, which she doesn't find in you.
If you really want to give it a final try, just move out... and just shut her out of your life for a few months and see what her responses are towards your relationship - finally, tell her that you are planning to get married to someone else very soon. I am pretty sure, she will bid you a warm "goodbye" and wish you a happy married life, if she really doesn't want your relationship.
What is yours will come to you. You cannot hold on too long to what is not yours... and remember, this is a lifetime decision - not a short affair.





























dutch84 says:
4 months ago
People fall in love, because we have an innate need for companionship. It is an evolutionary adaptation.