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Why do some Women date or marry Younger Men

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By Anamika S


Reasons why Older Women prefer Younger Men

Older women dating or marrying younger men is no longer looked with awe.I have seen many couples where the woman is older. The society has given relationships where older women dating younger men the name Cougar Dating which I think is very unkind and mean. When guys can date women who are old enough to be their daughters why can’t women do so? Isn’t this Hypocrisy or Double Standards?

What are the reasons why some older women prefer younger men? The reason may be any of the following.

1) May be its Love: Who said an Older Women cannot fall in love with a younger man? After all, Love can happen to anyone at any time and it even makes people do strange things.

2) Not every Woman want a father figure: Often a man who is older assumes a protective and paternal role which is a major turn off to many women. Many women like to take care of themselves, speak on their own behalf and even paying their own way without the help. Many of them find their match in younger men.

3) Younger men are often better in bed: It is said that guys reach their sexual peak between the ages of 18 and 25 whereas women tend to reach their sexual peak mostly around ages 35-45. Older men mostly get disinterested or less eager in bed with time whereas younger men are eager and more satisfying in bed.

4) Younger Men are more encouraging: Younger guys are charmed by the maturity or accomplishments of Older Women and tend to admire or appreciate women who are successful. And every woman likes Compliments.

5) Younger guys are more open minded and older women find them a breath of fresh air.

6) Guys in their prime are physically attractive: Younger men with tight bodies, bright eyes, great smiles is a better catch as a romantic partner compared to a middle-aged men who are going through physical changes like balding, wrinkles or love handles.

7) To prove they can: Many Older Women get into affairs with younger men because they want to prove to themselves or others that they have the power to attract someone younger. An Older woman may feel devalued and degraded when she does not get the attention from her spouse after child bearing or several years of marriage that she feels the need to prove that she is desirable.

8) Girls just want to have fun: Many Older Women are young at heart and desire to have some fun like long drives, partying, trekking or staying out all night and find a willing partner in a younger man.

9)To feel younger: Younger men make Older Women feel younger. This is a natural response. Sometimes older men tend to slow down a bit too early for some women. Many Women feel their own youth disappearing as they enter middle age and are try to recapture it through younger men and experience the fun, excitement and vitality that they felt when they were young. Moreover, Modern Women hate to be branded as older especially when more and more women seem to be looking better in their forties and fifties.

10) Ego Boost: Dating or marrying a younger man is an ego boost especially to someone ignored or dumped by husband for a younger woman.

11) To Nurture and Dictate:Many Women want someone she can nurture or dictate. Especially women who lost their spouses to death or divorce and who have been accustomed to having someone to take care of for years and suddenly find themselves with no one to care for but themselves finds a good match in younger men. Such men also help to satisfy the mothering instinct in women.

12) Younger Men are forbidden fruit: The society is not very encouraging when it comes to older women younger men relationships. It is a normal tendency of people to rebel or go after what is ‘forbidden’

Finally, it is also said that Women usually live an average of ten years longer than men. So hooking up with a man ten years younger makes perfect sense. For whatever reason some women prefer men who are younger than themselves I think it is their own business. Age difference also should not be criteria to those who mutually respect and enjoy each others company. If an older woman and a younger man feel comfortable having a relationship then no one has the right to criticize them.

Older Woman Younger Man relationships
Older Woman Younger Man relationships


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Comments

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Anath profile image

Anath  says:
3 months ago

For me it is reasons 6, 3 and 5 in that order. After trying younger men I could never go back to going out with someone my own age or older than me!

cindyvine profile image

cindyvine  says:
3 months ago

Because they don't like the saggy bits, like the buffed tined young bodies, and the stamina of a young man!

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Thanks for the comment Anand. Though i have had several friends who are unfaithful to their spouses or involved with younger men i am in no position to compare an older men with a young one because my man is younger than me and i was never involved or plan to involve with an older man or anyone else for that matter.

Thanks Cindy, I think youthful looks and body is an attraction for many.

emohealer profile image

emohealer  says:
3 months ago

It is so nice that all relationships are evolving more into the couple and the compatability and away from "the norm". Women tend to live longer than men as well so this arrangement could lead to a longer life together, if it is a good realtionship this is a huge plus. nice hub.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Thanks emohealer for the appreciation.

Surendra  says:
3 months ago

I love your blogs. What a wide range of subjects you cover!

Sawai Maharaja Man Singh II of Jaipur - His first wife, a Jodhpur primcess was older to him. That ofcourse was a political marriage.

A very famous jazz singer in Calcutta used to date boys almost half her age.Once I jocularly asked her,"What do you see in young boys? They have no experience". Pat came her reply,"What they lack in experience they make up in enthusiasm".

Another interesting case that comes to mind is of a wife of a very senior government officer. The husband would come to a Park Street restaurant at 5.30 in the evening and take 3/4 young boys to his house. He'd play cards with them while one of the boys, in turn, would go to his wife.The boys said that whenever they went there when the husband was not home the wife would not let them in. She met her needs and maintained her fidelity?

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Thanks for the encouragement and comments. Those are some interesting cases you have narrated. Even i have a 34 year old friend who was dumped by her husband for a 26 year old women and she got back to him by marrying a 23 year old guy.

kunika  says:
3 months ago

What if you had never met a guy and he is just your net friend and want to be with you forever.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

What anyone want or desire is his problem. And what you want to do about it is yours. I have nothing to say on that matter. Thanks for the comment anyway.

dohn121 profile image

dohn121  says:
3 months ago

Hello, Anamika! I liked #9 the best because at least to me, it makes perfect sense. I'm no psychologist, but I see why older women and men prefer those younger than themselves. Many times, these older women are coming out of a divorce or are being unfaithful to their husbands or just lost their husbands who passed away. Many women marry too soon and so are looking to recapture their youth by dating younger men and are making up for lost time. Men who turn 40 buy sports cars and women who turn 40 buy new boyfriends! Besides, isn't it popular opinion that 50 is the new 40?

By the way, thank you for your post on "my forum." It means a lot that I have your support!

Peter Dickinson profile image

Peter Dickinson  says:
3 months ago

I see nothing wrong in it. The more women who take up with younger men the better as it will leave more young women for me;-)

Joking apart. There is the advantage that fewer women will look on the older man/younger woman relationship with veiled thoughts of 'pervert'.

Providing the partners are willing, of a consenting age, no-one is being hurt and are getting something out of the relationship...then why not?

Thanks for the Hub.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Thanks dohn121 and Peter Dickinson for your valuable inputs.

BkCreative profile image

BkCreative  says:
3 months ago

An older woman is entitled to great sex - and not with a man who must take a scary prescription drug (viagra).

I love my younger men friends because they don't come to me with those age old exhausting 'woman in the kitchen' ideas. They are not one dimensional and in fact we can talk about everything - not just his job.

Despite the fact that women are now employed in the same jobs that men have - but can still get pregnant, and give birth - older men still think she should abide by the old outdated, unfair, exhausting script - you know, still be the one to cook, clean, shop, handle the children, run the home, be a pesonal servant, etc. and still go out to work full time - yet still be the only one in the couple who can become pregnant, while all he does is go to work.

A woman has been given too many roles with an older man. And they were designed by men not women.

Fortunately I had a great father and he taught us to live this one life we have in a way that makes up happy - without explaining or apologizing, and not to live it according to a man. Just do it!

smile8400 profile image

smile8400  says:
3 months ago

Hello Ansmika, I think young look like fresh fruit

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Thanks BkCreative for your inputs. I agree with you. We need to do what we want to.

Thanks for the comment smile8400.

bingskee profile image

bingskee  says:
3 months ago

it doesnt matter at all if a woman is older than a man. to make judgments is ignorance to me but hey, this hub is factual.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

bingskee : I think like you too. Thanks for the comment.

judydianne profile image

judydianne  says:
3 months ago

After my divorce, I fell in love with a younger man and it lasted 6 years. It was some of the best years of my life! As long as you both don't see anything wrong with it, and you have things in common, why not?

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

I agree with you. Thanks judydianne for your inputs.

Anath profile image

Anath  says:
3 months ago

I was talking from my experience. I've been married to someone 10 years older than me and now I am going out with someone 10 years younger. Each has its pros and cons, but I am keeping the young one :-)

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Thanks for your comments anath.

Rob Dee profile image

Rob Dee  says:
3 months ago

i happen to like women older than me. They tend to have their lives together and seem to know what they want and who they are. Not to mention...well....nevermind.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Thanks for expressing your Opinion Rob Dee. I have already written on why men prefer older women in another hub of mine.

http://hubpages.com/hub/Why-some-men-prefer-Older-

attractnmarketing profile image

attractnmarketing  says:
3 months ago

Anamika I really enjoyed your hub, and I enjoyed reading the comments as well. I agree it is a matter of opinion. I have a friend whose partner is 7 yrs younger than her and she said she would never go out with an older man now. I believe if you get on well, enjoy your relationship, have fun, and have a great time why not. At the end of the day its how you both feel not what society thinks.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

attractnmarketing : I wholeheartedly agree with you. if the couple feels good about the relationship, why not? thanks for the comments.

countrywomen profile image

countrywomen  says:
3 months ago

Anamika- I think it is also due to cultural upbringing that some women never consider younger men. In my family they say "never ask a woman's age and a man's income". But nowadays women are living longer than men and it makes more sense to almost be of the same age for companionship especially in old age when kids leave home.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

countrywomen : Yes, Cultural upbringing could be a reason. But since Women usually live an average of ten years longer than men isn't it better to hook up with someone who is ten years younger? Thanks for the comment.

countrywomen profile image

countrywomen  says:
3 months ago

Then Indian women would have to officially wait till 31 because the legal age for men to marry is 21 ;)

mistyhorizon2003 profile image

mistyhorizon2003  says:
3 months ago

What a great article. I always preferred older men, but in general they have let me down and the relationships have failed. I am now with a man only 3 years older than me and it works great. Recently I have been to a friend's wedding however, and she is about 37 years old, whereas her new Husband is only about 25. They get on fabulously, and have been together at least four years before even getting married, what's more, he totally accepts, is happy with, and supports the fact, that due to Thyroid problems she has no hair anywhere on her body, including her head, and has to wear wigs. They are a perfect match in every way though, and I love both of them to bits.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

countrywomen : Yes, you have got a point there. But if you notice the latest trends in marriage even in India girls are getting married only after their mid twenties or later and many even opt for living relationships.

mistyhorizon : I have several friends who live happily with their younger husbands too. If the couple is happy who are we to judge? Thanks for your input.

countrywomen profile image

countrywomen  says:
3 months ago

Oh I know. I was the oldest among all my cousins(girls) to be married when almost 26. And yes things are changing but not sure if everything is for better though.

Babaji M P profile image

Babaji M P  says:
3 months ago

Hi Anamika. Most of the men prefer to have a younger woman. I'm not an exception.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Babaji M P : If you look at the title it is about 'some men' liking older women. I am sure not everyone want a younger woman. Thanks for the comment.

anonymous  says:
3 months ago

Anamika:

On another note, there's 1 thing you didn't cover. If a woman wants to be a sugar mama or a man wants to be a sugar daddy, then that's fine, provided it's honest. You implied something bad about sugar daddies but if the woman is happy with the sugar daddy, then why should it matter for the same reason as if a woman is a sugar mama?

But getting to the main point, what has been my observation is that if a man is involved with a much older woman, the stigma isn't on the older woman. The fact is that it's much easier for a woman to get a man than vice versa. Hence, it's alot easier for an older woman to get a younger man than it is for an old man to get a young woman & this has been true since the start of time.

The stigma rather is on the young man. If a 24 year old man is involved with a 45 year old woman, people often wonder if the 24 year old man is desperate & this wonder does have justification. They often wonder in their mind "is this 24 year old man dating the 45 year old woman because he can't get dates with women his own age?"

Now don't misunderstand, if he is truly happy with the 45 year old woman, then there's no issue. But if he is seeing her because he can't get women his own age, then it's a different matter.

Also, what'll happen when he is older & wants children, which she won't be able to give him? As asked in my last post, should the older woman have an open relationship & allow the younger man to fool around with women his own age or younger? If the older woman is willing to allow him to have sexual relations with women his own age or younger & many sugar mamas do, then there's no issue.

When young men are asked if they would be willing to have a much older woman, an answer that is often given is only if the sugar mama will allow them to also have sex with women their age or younger, because they know the older woman won't give them the same sexual satisfaction that a younger woman can. The topic is more complex & complicated.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Thanks for expressing your Opinion.

Lgali profile image

Lgali  says:
3 months ago

another good hub lot of nice points thanks

Kyle  says:
3 months ago

I don't think the life expectancy is as dramatic as 10 years on average between men and women. Looking at developed countries it seems to be not that dramatic - 3-5 years usually.

I think it has a lot to do with #6 - most people of either gender find youth more appealing and attractive. All the rest is social conditioning/norms based on this.

I'm not buying #3 at all, I'm 23 but I'm willing to bet that most guys in their 30's still have high libido (and not much different than guys in their 20's) and a lot more sexual experience to back it up as well. Those "sexual peak" ages have always been a big myth and even the old guys just use viagra if they have ED.

Anamika S profile image

Anamika S  says:
3 months ago

Kyle : Thanks for expressing your opinion on Reasons why Older Women prefer Younger Men.

sultana657 profile image

sultana657  says:
3 months ago

thnks for ur nice hub

Chris Eddy111 profile image

Chris Eddy111  says:
3 months ago

Great coverage!! I think you got all of them. Speaking for myself, I like the harder, leaner body but he has to have skills which usually comes with lots of experience.

The name cougar doesn't bother me either. That is one hell of a wild animal so beware, lol.

Great hub.

IsabellaRothchild profile image

IsabellaRothchild  says:
3 months ago

I personally like #4 and #5. But I'd sure like your input on a couple cougar questions that arose at my home. I put them in my hub and the latest controversy was regarding the "sexual peak" debate. Could I get you to tell me your opinion?

IslandVoice profile image

IslandVoice  says:
2 months ago

Young, smart, strong, sounds good to me. It will work for some, and not necessarily for others. I wonder what it was like when nobody knew how to count, or read calendars? Great hub!

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