-My youngest brother who is a writer/publisher recently told he me was having a block in part because a friend of his had just died. I share my thoughts.

I wish I knew more about him, gee there is an idea, how about you tell me?

What about you sit down with a soothing non-alcohol beverage and write down first how you feel, explain it in detail don't just glaze over it with "I am bummed" show us, share it.

Next think about the good times you had with this person, why was she your friend? What made him unique? Special that got under your skin and in your mind, what sort of things reminded you of them when they were away? What sort of things will always remind you of her? Write them down, share them, I would love to know this experience known as "(Name Withheld)" but the most I can do is know it vicariously through you. So don't skimp on me now, tell me, show me with words.

For what better palette of colors to an artist of vocabulary than that which fills her/him with passion? If you cannot feel something you surely cannot make it felt to others. A writer writes, and successful writers write about that which they know and are passionate about. If you really thought of this person what better tribute to her and your friendship with him than to do an article/story that captures as many facets of the gem that she was?

Don't worry if you can't get it all, that is not important, just as much as you can, after all we are not gods we cannot see all the sides of a diamond at once, but we can see the radiant hues that sparkle off such gems and share it in the way reflected light surely landed on those around him.

Also do not waste time rattling in your mind that idea “oh no one will ever want to read this”, because it may be true that people do not like to hear the short form such as “poor me, life sucks so and so died”. If that is all you say can you blame them? What makes it interesting to people is when they can see the light this person had; when they can feel the giggles the person gave you or the headache. To do that you have to go deeper and write in a way that shares more completely the experience that they were to you. Anything less is turning them into a crib note and not only does that cheapen them but as a writer you have failed to be anything more than a hack.

It is also very comforting a project to complete, therapeutic, but don't think about that when your writing it is just a side effect. The important thing is to be honest about your feelings and search your memories for the moments that touched you the most about them and find a way to relate it. It may come out in a jumble incoherent sentences and paragraphs at first, that is ok and to be expected. Treat those jumbles as lumps of emotional clay waiting to be sculpted into a monument to the insights, humor and pain that defined your friendship with (Name Withheld). The only wrong way to do this is to not do it. Memories fade and with them go not only the pain of loss but also the special joy of the connection with that other soul, writing it down ensures or at least gives hope that it may outlast your memory.

Sin

*hugs*

Sib