http://mantonadvisory.com/secret-of-transitions.htm
The choice to intentionally transition is always ours to make. But because the future does not come with any guarantees, there are some choices that require more than just a little courage.

Thats why transitions require finding your true voice and discovering the best of who you are. It's about living your life courageously and discovering that it is not the fear of death that moves you, but rather the joy of being vibrantly alive. In short, its about creating a purposeful life. Welcome to The Secret of Transitions.

Does your Monday morning alarm clock immediately fill your mind with dreadful thoughts of going to a job you hate? Do you wonder how much longer you can continue going to an unfulfilling job? Or maybe you feel it’s not even up to you to decide. You might sense there is a changing coming, and it’s not going to be good for you or your career.

You are not alone. In a massive study by Harris interactive and Franklin Covey, less than 10% of the people interviewed said they were totally energized and committed to company goals. Even more frustrating for many people was the time they spent on urgent but irrelevant tasks. Their work held little or no significance for them.

If that’s what’s happening to you, what do you do now?

That’s the question Robert had on his mind when he came into my office last week. He had been referred to me by a former client who knew I was open to meeting and helping people in transition. Like many people at the beginning of a transition, Robert was confused.

He thought he was looking for a new job. But that’s not what he needed…at least not right then. Not only was Robert confused about what he is looking for, he was also about to make a dumb career move. He was about to leave his current employer because he was unable to see any of the real possibilities that existed for him right there.

After I asked him what he saw as his next opportunity, he said, “Well, right now I don’t know for sure, at least not specifically. Are you asking me what I’m passionate about? A good friend told me it was time to discover my passion and just go do it. But I’m not really passionate about anything, you know what I mean?”

I think I did understand what he meant. He was more committed to a safe and easy landing than taking the time and effort to create a career that would satisfy and fulfill him. That’s why I said he’s confused. Robert is not looking for a job. He’s looking for himself - who he is and what he stands for.

Robert is 44 years old, in good health and has a life expectancy of at least 40 more years. Forty more years! He has enough time to fully enjoy one or two more careers. Now is not the time to settle. Now is the time to be accountable for what he wants. No one else can or should tell him what that is.

It only took a few questions to free his thinking. What do you enjoy doing? What is the most significant contribution to another person or organization you’ve made? What other accomplishments are you most proud of? What do you do really well…maybe as good as or even better than anyone else?

After another five questions or so, Robert got it. He saw that he was willing to fire himself (leave his job) because he thought no one in management cared about him. What suddenly became apparent to Robert was that he had not cared about himself.

It wasn’t his boss or management that created the problem. He had not been accountable for his gifts; he had not acknowledged his accomplishments; and he had failed to see how helping other people solve technical problems energized and fulfilled him.

There was a huge opportunity for him to contribute in his current role waiting to be fulfilled. He just hadn’t asked. It wasn’t in his job description. He had been waiting for permission and direction. When he let that sink in, he was ready to take a stand.

In less than 10 minutes, we had outlined a proposal he could take back to his boss. It was exciting for both of us because it would be challenging, rewarding and even fun to take on…and it would make a giant contribution toward improving productivity at his firm.

Robert also saw that this kind of work would be valued by a number of other firms in the area. I told him that if his boss didn’t take him up on his proposal, I would introduce him to at least three companies who would be interested in talking to him. I haven’t heard back from Robert, and I don’t think I will.

Robert learned a valuable lesson. If you are feeling disengaged at work, then there are some very important questions to answer before you start looking elsewhere.

The Crucial Question:
Is it you or the job that is creating the problem?

I often ask my clients when they are frustrated to take a look at the problem as if they were the cause of it. While it’s not necessarily true that they are the problem, taking that position often opens up some very powerful insights. Being accountable and responsible for a problem creates more personal power and resolve than does blame. So think about it, is it you or the job?

Don’t get me wrong. Management must do a better job of engaging people. More than 10 years ago the Gallop organization identified a crucial link between employee retention and their boss: people leave their managers, not their companies. Gallup also identified the factors that engaged people, and they found that the best managers focused on those factors.

They were basic things like having clear expectations; having the right resources and equipment; an opportunity to use one’s strengths, skills and talents everyday; working for a boss who cares; and having one’s opinions count.

But before you blame your boss, try finding how you might be the cause before you leave the company. Here are some questions to explore: How many requests have you made to have whatever is missing be supplied? How many people have you asked? Are they the right people? Are you waiting to be discovered? Or are you actively promoting your skills and proposing how you can make a difference. Again, how often and to whom? Do you have some short comings that you either haven’t acknowledged or are denying? Do you actively seek feedback and look for ways to improve?

Could it be true that what separates the most successful people from others is the number of requests that successful people make during their lifetime? Do you have the courage to find out? Start asking today.

Jim Manton, aka The Master of Transitions, is a Business Consultant, and Transition Coach.

You’ve heard it said many times, “Follow your bliss. Pursue your passion. Do what you love doing”. Not only has it been said for thousands of years, and it’s also backed by modern career interest surveys and assessments. It doesn’t take a scientist to figure out that most people do well what they love doing, and love doing what they do well.

One of the most prolific authors on this subject is Marcus Buckingham. He has written a number of outstanding books including Now, Discover Your Strengths and Go Put Your Strengths to Work in which he provides powerful proof on the linkage between excellence and doing what you do well everyday. Buckingham’s years of research show that people “playing to their strengths significantly outperform those who don't in almost every business metric”.

When I decided to transition from the corporate world, I starting by writing down what I loved, what moved me, what excited me and what fulfilled me during my years as a leader. In those pages I discovered a blueprint from which I could design my coaching and consulting practice. The key elements in that blueprint became the foundation for my coaching and consulting business.

What are those key elements? They are a translation of the competencies I used to perform the things I love doing. Using psychometric tools and other leadership assessments, I identified the skills, experience, motives, interests, values, strengths, as well as my own particular style in order to understand how I could add the most value to my clients. It’s exactly the same process I use to help CEOs assess and select senior leaders, except that I was assessing myself for a business I would love doing for years to come.

I knew if I focused on what I loved doing, both my clients and I would be well served. Eight years later I am still energized and immensely fulfilled by my work. I even devoted a chapter in my book, The Secret of Transitions, to the power that is created when purpose and passion are combined to launch a life or career transition.

So why is pursuing one’s passion often a recipe for a career or small business dead-end? It’s because we often mistake “being comfortable” as an important indicator of something we love doing.

Here’s an easy exercise to test the assertion I just made. Answer this question as fast as you can: What do you like doing? Go ahead and write down the answers. Now compare the answers with the answers to these questions: What have been your peak moments? If you’re stuck, think about your best day; your most rewarding day; or your most fulfilling day. What were you doing and why was it so enjoyable?

I’ve interviewed hundreds of people, and I’ve never had anyone tell me that their best day ever was comfortable. When you get home and your partner asks “Did you have a good day?” you might say yes because there were no hassles or emergencies. But that easy day probably doesn’t represent your best day ever.

In fact, many say their best day ever was when they were the most challenged, and they were still able to succeed by using their true strengths and talents. Others when asked about their best day identify a significant contribution to they made to another person, their team, a customer or their organization. Not only is overcoming a challenge and making a difference personally rewarding, but that is also when our needs for approval, recognition, a sense of achievement and other rewards are fulfilled. That’s what motivation is all about.

But even more important is that these tough situations actually improve and add to our strengths. It’s just like muscle building. Muscle growth comes through an appropriate mix of learning the correct techniques, practice, and increased stress followed by a recovery period. It holds true for personal and professional growth as well.

Yes, I agree that loving your work and using your strengths every day is great. But without on-going growth, those strengths rapidly atrophy, and even become irrelevant. In many fields today, the amount of new information and knowledge is doubling every couple of years. A person can become obsolete in less than five years without on-going growth. And the best kind of professional development is not always comfortable.

The best personal development practices include a combination of training, coaching and new and challenging experiences in which a person is at risk and the stakes are high.

Combine challenging experiences with direct, honest and frequent feedback, and you’ve got a proven formula for growth.

Frankly, failure can be a powerful teacher. I’ve not only heard it but I’ve experienced it. But it’s usually better earlier in your career than later. When it comes too late, it can have a devastating effect of all of the stakeholders, not just the executive.

You’ve probably heard of the phenomenon known as “The empty suit,” referring to an executive who no longer has any real substance or competence. After years of getting only wildly positive feedback, the executive believes he is truly exceptional and supremely deserving. There is no longer any real motivation to learn or grow. Excessively arrogant and convinced of his infallibility, he sticks rigidly to his old strategies and ways of doing business. He rejects new ideas automatically. And the empty suit soon starts to fail, sometimes taking the entire company down with him. We’ve seen that hubris all too often in recent corporate scandals.

This just doesn’t apply to executives who happen to wear suites. I don’t care what you wear, it can happen to anyone. Anything that is not growing will waste away in all respects – physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. There will be little left but an empty shell.

One of the reasons so many of us resist growth is the result of a paradoxical career trap. Even if people love their jobs, it can still be stressful and require long hours. Once they get home, family and community duties can be equally demanding. There is little capacity or energy left for growth, especially if the need for balance and recovery has been ignored. So they’re stuck. No growth, no new opportunities. They encounter a career dead end of their own making.

Given how many people are seeking a way out of their stressful situations, I wonder how many small businesses are mistakenly purchased as a symbolic representation of one’s passion. Instead of a dream come true, that Bed & Breakfast in New Hampshire becomes a nightmare. That’s because it wasn’t a bold pursuit of purpose and passion. It was an escape.

Retreats and safe harbors are wonderful for reclaiming and rebuilding one’s resources. But they can be lousy places to live. If your “dream” creates a sense of an idyllic and comfortable future, you could be heading down the wrong path. Instead of feeling comfortable, perhaps it is fear that signals your true path. Personally, I’ve found that lurking behind my greatest aspirations, there is fear. The bigger my dream, the greater my resistance.

Almost any time we contemplate a new and untested future, we are likely to experience a confusing mix of exhilaration and fear. It’s probably a natural result of our early childhood conditioning. But the most common regrets expressed at the end of life are centered on not risking enough to discover one’s true gifts and use them to make a difference – to know that their life mattered. Instead, they played it safe and comfortably.

Experiencing a regret at the end of your career and especially at the end of your life is way too late. Start now. Being tested, stretched and going beyond the edge of your comfort zone is nature’s prescription for vitality, confidence, and strength. Welcome that fear you feel at the beginning of a transition. It is a gift you must unwrap.