Almost since its lamentable inception in 1999, The Scottish Parliament has introduced a succession of crazy and ridiculous notions to the Scottish social and political landscapes. It appears that many elected to this Disneyland of the Political World upon doing so instantly lose complete touch with reality and all their basic common sense. In the latest of a long line of measures specifically designed to stifle free speech and police the thoughts of the people, it has actually been proposed that the delightful childrens' (and adults') party song, The Hokey Cokey, be banned as being anti-Catholic!!! Apparently, there is "some evidence" that centuries ago, this song knows its origins in a mockery of the Roman Catholic Mass.

My immediate reaction? Who cares???

If the instigators of the proposals to ban the Hokey Cokey are looking for some other nonsensical direction in which to push their pens, perhaps they would also like to consider taking action upon the following list of extremely offensive and hate-filled songs?

Scottish Songs The Scottish Parliament May Also Consider Banning?

1) Flower of Scotland - offensive to the English and to Unionists.

2) Scotland the Brave - offensive to cowards.

3) Westering Home - offensive to people in the East of Scotland.

4) Wee Cock Sparra' - offensive to a lot of men!

5) These Are My Mountains - offensive to the Dutch.

6) The Dark Island - offensive to Caucasians.

7) A Scottish Soldier - offensive to pacifists.

8) Bonnie Dundee - offensive to Glaswegians, Edinburghers and Aberdonians.

9) 100 Pipers - offensive to cigarette smokers.

10) Northern Lights of Old Aberdeen - offensive to the visually impaired.

11) Mhairi's Wedding - offensive to homosexuals.

12) The Skye Boat Song - offensive to Skye Bridge users.

It has been alleged by Scottish National Party representatives that the Hokey Cokey knows its origins, circa three centuries ago, in Protestant mockery of a Roman Catholic Priest performing Mass. Did you know that? I certainly didn't, I'm sure that the millions of people all over the world of all religions who make merry performing the Hokey Cokey didn't - and for sure, neither did all those unfortunates who could now face arrest and criminal prosecution for performing it at the "wrong" time.

No one in Scotland could argue that there was for many years a serious problem with religious bigotry. It came in to every aspect of our lives, from schools, to pubs, to football matches and many more besides. Just in my lifetime, however, I have seen a distinct downturn in the levels of said bigotry, despite the "efforts" of such as those who came up with this latest offensive drivel (and I'm not talking about the Hokey Cokey!)

I have heard many versions of the Hokey Cokey sung over the years, some of them distinctly "adult" in nature, but each and every one of them had something in common - they were jocular, merry, about fun and having a good time. Never in my wildest imaginings could I have ever before conceived of this song as being offensive to Roman Catholics, Protestant Catholics, any other form of Catholic...or even "Zorg," the man from the moon - or whatever planet he is living on - that first came up with this notion.

The Hokey Cokey is a nonsensical song in terms of the words, of course it is, but equally it is a fun song, the music, the lyrics and the dance enjoyed by all ages, creeds and colours, the whole world over. Why couldn't certain people just leave it as such...?

This Saturday, December 27th, Rangers play Celtic at Ibrox Stadium in Glasgow in what is known as "The Old Firm" match. Historically, the two teams and their supporters represent both sides of the religious divide, Protestant and Roman Catholic.

To raise the issue of The Hokey Cokey as described above is of course madness at any time, but to do so in the week of an Old Firm match and then come out and state that any Rangers supporter singing it in what is deemed to be a manner designed to incite religious hatred will face the possibility of arrest is beyond lunacy.

If this story had not broken, this Saturday's match would have come and gone probably without any one of the 52,000 people who will attend it giving the vaguest thought to The Hokey Cokey. Who, therefore, one could argue, is ultimately responsible for any incitement to religious hatred which allegedly occurs?