Horrible. Ack, horrible. They sell this in a can? How can it taste this bad?

I mean it looks like an energy drink, and those taste good. Right?

And then you read the packaging: 9.9% alcohol. Also it's caffeinated.

It's like something from college. From one of those "Jungle Juice" parties where someone made fruit punch and dumped a bottle of hard alcohol in. Which is fitting, because it is named "Jungle Joose."

Jungle Joose is one of the latest energy alcohol combo drinks to hit the shelves of US liquor stores. What sets Jungle Joose apart from “Energy Beers” such as Bud Extra and Sparks (which dropped the caffeine and now sucks) is the insane amount of malt liqour in each 23.5 oz. can.

With the 23.5 oz. cans clocking in at 9.9% alcohol per volume this Jungle Joose is more like wine than beer. Or hard alcohol poured into a glass of mountain dew.

Which brings me to the next think that makes Jungle Joose a “hell beverage”: the caffeine. I couldn’t find any solid numbers on the can, but based on my energy drink habit I can tell you it is as has as much caffeine or more than the average energy drink mix.

Two experiences which illustrate just what Jungle Joose is:

• Deciding to go to a Ratatat concert when I was so drunk I should have been passed out. Dancing wildly, having a grand old time. Sleeping three hours before a 8 a.m. workday
  
• Sharing a can of Jungle Joose with a friend before we went on a 3 a.m. four mile walk. The conclusion of which came when he passed out on a concrete bridge as the sun was rising in the distance
• Taking to the night in a sketchy part of Boston because I just could not control my feet