WHAT IS IT WITH MEN AND THEIR PENISES?
80MAYBE IT STARTS IN THE WOMB?
HABITUAL FONDLERS?
If you enjoyed this article and need professional writing services, please visit my website at: http://www.yourarticlewriter.com
After raising four sons and being married twice, I pretty much thought I knew as much as there was to know, at least as much as any woman knows, about penises. I cannot even express to you the number of times in a day I would have to tell one of my sons to "take his hand out of his pants"! I never could figure out why boys must touch themselves periodically during the day, everyday. Were they checking to see if their penis was okay; just making sure it was still there and had not fallen off? Or, even worse, were they becoming "habitual" fondlers!? That was my fear. Afterall, we try to teach our children socially acceptable behaviors from day one. We teach them it is not okay to eat with their mouths open, to pick their nose in public and that they must always cover their mouth when they sneeze. However, we never think to mention "no hands in the pants" or "no touching your penis in public" until they have already started doing it. And, before we know it, before we can train them not to, they are doing it all the time! Well, history is repeating itself! I was having a wonderful lunch with two of my sons, my husband and my daughter-in-law. We were celebrating my birthday. My son and daughter-in-law had just come from their ultra-sound. What a sweet birthday surprise for me! We were having a girl this time after two beautiful grandsons! During the course of the lunch, my daughter-in-law leaned over and asked me, "did any of your boys have issues with their penises"? She continued, "Braden touches himself all the time and he seems to have "erections" all day long. It all came rushing back to me. I knew Braden touched himself alot. As a grandmother, I continually would ask him if he had to go "potty". And, are you ready for this? Braden is only five years old! So, again. What is it with the penis and when does it start, in the womb? Women always say that men "think with their.......'s"! Now I know it must be true. We are talking about a gorgeous, blue-eyed, blonde, smart as a whip, little boy who could speak Spanish before he could speak English, who plays soccer, basketball, goes to music lessons, Sunday school and is always booked for play dates. I mean the kid is crazy busy but still he can't stop thinking about his penis. Can you imagine how distracting this must be for a five year old? Have boys and men really been carrying this burden in silence for centuries? Could this be the answer to their constant hornyness? I really wasn't sure I could give my daughter-in-law the correct advice. I either couldn't remember if erections were involved when the boys were little other than potty time and waking up in the morning time. I told her perhaps she should ask her pediatrician if this was normal.
So, does this knowlege change our view of men? Should we cut them some slack knowing they are totally out of control when it comes to their penises? Or, do we run like hell the other way?
<!-- Kontera ContentLink(TM);-->
<script type='text/javascript'>
var dc_AdLinkColor = 'blue' ;
var dc_PublisherID = 94549 ;
</script>
<script type='text/javascript' src='http://kona.kontera.com/javascript/lib/KonaLibInline.js'>
</script>
INFORMATION BEST LEFT FOR A FATHER AND SON CAMPING TRIP!!
And, as a mother or grandmother of boys how do we teach them socially acceptable behavior when they are only four or five years old, practically still babies, who have no idea why a certain part of their body keeps popping up and sticking out. If we tell them it is a bad thing will it affect them negatively? Just how do boys come to understand their pesky penises? How do they come to understand that, even though constant erections all day long are greatly distracting, they must never, ever touch it or acknowledge it in public and how do you tell a little boy, a man to be, that this seemingly uncontrollable body part will only become more uncontrollable the older he gets? Or, as a woman, a mother or grandmother, do we even want to go there? Perhaps some things are best left to be discovered....or, perhaps,best left to their father's or grandfather's to discuss with them.
As women, maybe the best we can do is take this knowlege about man's uncontrollable organ and use it to our advantage. Wait just a minute! I think most of us already have!
Comments
Well, if you look at adult men, they are always rearranging themselves. I find it quite disconcerting when standing in a queue and a man starts to grope his groin and re-align his little package.
It is nuts isn't Cindy I am telling you I don't understand it, maybe its because it has nerves and is sensitive to the touch, when clothes or articles rub against them. At that point it becomes annoying to them. That is the only thing I can think of.:)
Hey, maybe shops can have a -re-arrange your penis- cubicle so that we don't have tow watch them adjust themselves
Ladies...if ya had one....ya might understand? They don't make penis friendly undies. It's kinda like us not understanding the hundreds of vaginal care commercials. :)
so Tom, just let it hang free then
Zippers and fear of squirrels. :)
what is Pest doing inside your pants?
Chashing his unkle Mike! :)
Tom , How in the world could they make penis friendly undies???
I see how it is...LOL!
The answer is simple...We fondle our wieners because we can't lick 'em. Watch a tom cat...he will be walking then all of a sudden he will plop down for a lick or two, the kitty equivilent to fondling.
Misha!!! And they dont have to woryy about sitting on their boobs...well most women dont!
LOL sure they don't! They have it too easy I would say :D
Penis friendly undies would have lips!
now, now, your sausage and two potatoes are no where the size of our boobs
well cindy, it depends, you know ;)
hey, some women have their hanging down to their knees
LOL some men have it even further down - yet it is an exception on both sides :)
I never played with mine til I got older and discovered how good it felt. Now as to the adjusting of said penis....if any of you ladies have large breasts, think about how sometimes your bra cuts into you and you need to adjust. Men....same thing...only lower.
bHowell is probably gonna get pissed we took over her penis story. If this shows up twice blame hubpages....but Pest your story reminded me of my uncle Bob. My aunt was feeding him dog food and it killed him. He was crossing the road one day and sat down to lick his wiener and a truck ran over him.
Good point blue. Or how many times doea a significant other ask us men to help adjust theirs?
Well Pest you done told us that Momma has you help with hers all the time......do I get royalties when I mention Momma???
Has to be a direct link, then the dough comes streaming in for you! I promise!
Oh good grief!!! I am a way for a hot second and here we gooooooooo...lolololololo:)
Many men don't like condoms because they make their Little Soldier less sensitive. So maybe that's the answer to the recurring need to rearrange "the package" in public - wearing condoms when they know they'll be in public. Just a thought...
JamaGenee-- that's brilliant solution!
It's really a matter of manners. Men can be trained not to belch and fart in public. They may resent this, but it's possible. Similarly, they are capable of refraining from self-touch in public. But it's kinda like nose-picking in the car. For some reason, they think they can get away with it and nobody's gonna see them. LOL. Guess what, guys? We see you! And your little package is sooo cute. Yes, it looks even cuter on that side then where you had it a minute ago:-).
I think living in the desert is half of the issue for me. That much heat all the time does not make for a comfortable situation. True, we don't have to adjust in public, but most are are just too secure to care lol
This question is very easy to answer. We as boys have always loved toys. Especially guns, it is shaped like a gun and it makes us very happy because it's our built in toy.
We must play!!!
They all seem to love them, it's their favorite tool. Jim Morrison even wrote an ode for his...
So I suppose it's normal.
I'm very impressed that the comments here didn't take the turn south they could have
if the high school locker room mentality crowd had wondered in. Most of the main points have been covered nicely. The only thing I really care about is how my beautiful wife feels about it and how often she wants it.
I believe that a boys "tool" is growing while little and the "hard on" is streching it and causing growth. Just my opinion. Fondling yourself in pubilc, I personally do NOT do this, nor do I pick my nose (in public), because I dont want people seeing my discustingness (if thats a word), but that is just me.
Oh yeah, touching oneself is fun also! Just not in public.
Well, I suppose at the pre-school age it is exploring themselves just as girls poke around. But really, its a limp topic. who cares? Seems like the rappers and gangbanger adult men grab their crouch as some sort of symbology or maybe they think it is sexy. The rolling stones 1968 LP cover is classic, Sticky Finger, had a hard on in pants and included a zipper. The Beatles had so much more class! Many men are not fixated on it at all.
Haha. I have wondered about this too. It doesn't bother me to see a man rearrange his package. I think scratching your butt in public is worse. Sometimes things need a little shift thats all. I know I have to adjust my boobs once in a while.
Well to check his instrument wether its in safe conditon or not , if u touch it at least twice in a minute penis get vigilent n sometimes get wild ...lol ANDY NASLAS
That's actually a pretty tough question to answer, and not many people have even come close to being serious...its one of those topics that may you uncomfortable, so you joke. As one guy said, they don't make penis/package friendly underwear, or pants. And unfortunately different people also have different preferences. I don't understand how anyone can wear boxers for example. That just hangs to free...and can actually be painful if you sit down wrong. I'm convinced "smaller" guys prefer them, but that's not really "penis size", its the next part down.
Also sadly, erections don't just occur when you're arroused, not exactly like when a woman walks into a cold room, but you get the idea. So if you're pointed south, and things start to firm up...well, it gets a bit cramped going the wrong way. I remember trying to explain this to my mom when I was 6...not one of my fonder memories.
Also, while you're busy staring at our "package" to see if we adjust it, check out the women. Women are constantly adjusting their bra straps, and the "under-wire" area. I couldn't tell you how many times the checker at a store stood right in front of me as I paid, and adjusted her bra straps. I could never figure out why you don't just adjust the little things, so they don't fall down...or is this some strange pickup line? I've also been told that if you buy the right size bra, the straps don't fall down...but I have no experience in that department to share. Maybe as my daughters get older, I'll learn about it...lol *rolls eyes*
Great article though, hope some of my points help ya'll understand a little better what's going on down there...lol
Some kids are more into their bodies than others. I tried to make up for my early childhood limitations later in life. Go Braden!
BTW, men can get turned on walking around in jeans. So, just remember that when you go to the store ladies. ::))
One more tidbit. Women are not passionate enough. Men would like their women to pay serious attention to their private parts. That is just the way it is. The human race would not have survived if men had the sex drive of a woman.
Funny joke: A nimpho is a woman who has the sex drive of the average man.
Personally I think the brain is the biggest sex organ in the body, and men allegedley think about sex once every 6 seconds. So its quite unsurprising that men constantly "check back" on the wee man, or that they become aroused simply because they stood in a warm breeze. And asa mom to a 13 year old boy, Its been my experience that they discover their penis withinin a few weeks of birth and never ever eave it alone for the rest of their lives! I have heard tell, that male feotuses touch themselves in the womb, such is the advance in modern scanning techniques. That Y chromosome has a lot to answer for!
I have loved everyone's comments! There is so much more to say on this subject! Thank you. I would love to hear from more males on the issue.
Maybe it boils down to asking the man (or boy) what he is doing. I have a family member who was very precocious as a boy, and my mother had taken him to the fair when he was all of 2 (yes, 2) years old. My mom caught him tugging at the front of his shorts, and asked him if he needed to go potty. He told her "no, I'm adjusting my penis because my shorts were scratching it." Well! That answered her question.
Hee hee... you make sense and I take you seriously, but I must be flippant.
Boys and men play with their penises because they can.
It's all part of growing up. When a boy gets his first erection, he ponders 'what's this!' Tactile investigation proves to be stimulating. During the first years, it is exciting, wonderous, and comforting. Later, it becomes a source of aggravation. Let him play with it before it starts giving him trouble.
Personally, I love my little blankie. It goes with me everywhere. My penis is my valient explorer, ever leading forward. It points in the direction I want to go. It ALWAYS points the direction I'm heading! I can count on that. This is reassuring. I never will worry that it doesn't know the way, and if I ever feel lost, I just reach into my pants to find where I'm heading next.
Though it always points forward, most of the time it points down too. When I think about that, it's mighty depressing, Down... into the dirt. Burried or ash. But nobody can fight it. Death is coming, and my little winkie says it's fair! We all get to die once! Only once. What could be more fair than that? However, thinking on this only depresses me. I like to look on the bright side, and think only that it's pointing forward. Onward, ever onward....
Since I'm heading to hell like we all are, things look a little better when it points up. Maybe it's gonna get some. Maybe I gotta give it some. I figgered that both must be good things. I mean, c'mon! Who wouldn't? My blankie has been better'n a red wagon! He has led me to women! I guess that's why he gets the lion's share of pleasure when we score. ANd I ain't complaining either, 'cause what's left over is darn good enough!
Little boys will be little boys and men will be men. We play with our penises because we can. Little girls and women stick their hands down their pants too, but probably not as often 'cause their just isn't much to hang on to. But if little girls had a tugger toy like the boys, I'm sure they'd tug just as much as boys do. Tis only natural. It's a toy to a boy, and it's always right there with you, ever ready, and never complains. Mom does enough complaining for both me and my blankie!
It ain't the toys that are bothersome. It's the hormones. When little boys grow up and little girls 'mature', it's the hormones that's making all the ruckus. If it weren't for them, neither men or women would be stickin' their hands down their pants. And it if weren't for them, neither men or wormen would go nuts as often as they do. Gotta have it, gotta have it... oh no! It's not right. It's not working! The moon and the tides are driving me crazy! Gotta have it! It ain't workin'! It can't find a companion! Not tonight... I have a headache.
Both men and women go through this.
So be glad that boys play with their toys. When they get old enough, they got a good notion of what to do with it. And if they didn't, then women would be crazier than they already is! Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Hell seems to come once a month for many, and what do they blame? Their hormones! Men don't do that. Men go play soccer, or beat each other up, or let loose their frustration on other men, acting lke they have a blankie that's better'n the next guy's. The kinder, nobler gentlem that women most wormen prefer, go back to playing with their blankie and their imaginary friends! And what do women do? Holler! Thats right, they holler! Women! They go absolutely nuts! They start complaining about, among other things, boys playing with their blankies, of all things, fer peter's sake!
Tis true! I saw it on a bumper sticker. It said "If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!"
So... count your blessings. We all play with our winkies. Let the little boys tug on their toys. It ain't gonna cause 'em near as much trouble as not tuggin' will! Heaven forbid what women forbid! T'would be a far crazier world than it already is, and it sure is crazy already.
p.s. Don't sweat the small stuff.
It's hard for us guys to give up our first toys, you know!
Once there was a penis named genis,he stood up as, if to greet us,If, he could talk he would say, how proud he was to meat us, then forgetting his manners he would he would tuck himself down,in his own little crown ,like a fetus
Woman who ,so often like to see us ,often deride ,the fact that we were once only a fetus,
So,the next time you see us,and want to meat us,don't forget,we came from a fetus
Like,the old indian saying,walk in someones mockins ,for a day,before you judge them !
Your YING is,My YANG !
Mine's the perfect gentleman. He stands whenever a lady enters the room!
Mine's the perfect gentleman. He stands whenever a lady enters the room!
Darn!!! After reading your hub, I have just discovered I am not normal??
Since I never look at men that way, also, I have never noticed?
Ladies, could it be that you are obsessed with something you don't have?
Why is it that ladies always give their head that special shake, you know, the "vain" shake?
My husband says men name them because the do not want a complete stranger making all their decisions for them .... groan...
<!-- /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} p {margin-right:0in; mso-margin-top-alt:auto; mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:0in; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.25in 1.0in 1.25in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} -->
HELLO MY DEAR BHOWELL,---- I don’t know how much knowledge you have about, child or a boy. I think that you are just taking more attention on this behavior. Be calm and cool. There is nothing bad about touching the penis. Your child is too small to under stand the how to behave in public.
Lets me say about my own problem. When I was about age of 13 to 15 I had this type of problem, and my many friend told me and I observed my self, and I observe other also doing the same. I observed that My penis gets erected suddenly. and suddenly it may come in its normal size. In this both case boy gats irritation, and he cannot control any more and he try to adjust the penis and his hand goes to it. Also it happens because today child are growing fast and they become adult in small age.
Second is that many time child go to potty but at last some water remains in the penis and come out after some time. this can irritate the boy.
It can be of skin disease or sensitive skin problem, so that his skin gets cracks and irritation persists.
And many time the use of things like soap. Use of soap area near penis, it softens the skin and viruses and bacteria get the chance to live there and person gets irritation for that, and his hand goes there. They will learn public behavior in coming years. I also want to say that my two your child is also touching his penis . what to do? That’s OK.
HELLO MY DEAR BHOWELL,---- I don’t know how much knowledge you have about, child or a boy. I think that you are just taking more attention on this behavior. Be calm and cool. There is nothing bad about touching the penis. Your child is too small to under stand the how to behave in public.
Lets me say about my own problem. When I was about age of 13 to 15 I had this type of problem, and my many friend told me and I observed my self, and I observe other also doing the same. I observed that My penis gets erected suddenly. and suddenly it may come in its normal size. In this both case boy gats irritation, and he cannot control any more and he try to adjust the penis and his hand goes to it. Also it happens because today child are growing fast and they become adult in small age.
Second is that many time child go to potty but at last some water remains in the penis and come out after some time. this can irritate the boy.
It can be of skin disease or sensitive skin problem, so that his skin gets cracks and irritation persists.
And many time the use of things like soap. Use of soap area near penis, it softens the skin and viruses and bacteria get the chance to live there and person gets irritation for that, and his hand goes there. They will learn public behavior in coming years. I also want to say that my two your child is also touching his penis . what to do? That’s OK.
bhowell, here ya go. don't unnerstan how in the hell i missed out on this for a whole dam week almost. Anyway, I was born with a hard on and it stayed that way until I was 55 years old, very uncomfortable at times, especially when as a kid in school I got called to the blackboard a lot and had to figure out how in the hell I could git up there with my pecker stickin out like that. I'd pinch him, slap him down and that just seemed to please him more and he got harder, they have a life of their own and must be tended too frequently or one can explode. I did once right in front of the teacher and it trickled down my legs into my shoe. I almost fainted with ecstasy, she took me to the nrs and she put a cold rag on it and cleaned me up and then was so shocked when it rose up again in her face at attention. I think she liked it.
You women just don't understand how it is with us males. I hope this helps you understand some of what it is like for some of us anyway. Now the dam things at it agin cause my lap pup wiggled his ass on it. git out o here dog.
CC, no comment required, you're just a hard bastard
haah cindy, speechless in china
Hey, I'm trying to write a play for the other Grade 4 teacher and the ESL teacher to act out with me in front of the class to show different perspectives on explorers. I'm going to be Thillanatarajan Sivakumaran - and Indian in 1524 and then there's Da Gama and an Interviewer!
Hey, I'm trying to write a play for the other Grade 4 teacher and the ESL teacher to act out with me in front of the class to show different perspectives on explorers. I'm going to be Thillanatarajan Sivakumaran - and Indian in 1524 and then there's Da Gama and an Interviewer!
good luck cindy, have fun with the little tykes
Are you kidding me? Why do men always get lumped together? I don't "check" on my penis throughout the day. I know it's their without feeling it. My sons don't check on theirs throughout the day either. I must say that "whitey titeys" aren't very comfortable, which is why I don't own a pair. My oldest son was in boxer briefs as soon as they made them in his size.
I have seen a couple guys at work who seemingly have the need to adjust their friend even in the middle of a meeting. I can honestly say, I don't have friends who do this. I would call them on it right on the spot.
So, while I find this article interesting and somewhat hilarious, I have to say that not ALL of us do this.
Realestatebuff, I have looked at this thread with a bit of humor, specially the title attracts a lot of attention. But I'm with ya, in fact I have never really observed intentionally in detail, but really I don't see the touchy behavior in public either.
I have never felt the need to touch mine either, unless I use it for something of course. LOL
So, I think what is happening here is ladies are like men. When I see a nice girl, my eyes wonder to the good places, specially the boobies. The women in this thread probably just look at men differently than we do.
Lengo Best Answer of all
It's like the fifth inning stretch you hear about in baseball,sometimes you just need to just stand up,stretch! lol
and it feels the same way!
My 4 year old son wears those boxer brief underwear. When he's home, he's just like his dad and drops his pants at the door. I then frequently find him (my son, not my husband) walking around with it sticking out of the flap. I have no idea why. Strange behavior those boys have with their penises.
Well us men do have to rearrange ourselves often, we try to do it discreetly so as not to look like a prev in public. Weather you wear boxers or briefs the thing is with just walking around, things move, and generally can get a tad uncomfortable, so we are forced to adjust ourselves.Also it can get well damp with perspiration which just makes one thing stick to two other things,
If you ever see a man look like he is wincing when in public it generally means hes just done himself an injury as his meat and veg have been caught / squished.
The most self conscious I have ever been was when in hospital in a mixed room of older female patents all things and I kept getting an erection which was weird to me as I was well sick hence the hospital, when I spoke to a male nurse about it, he told me it was quite natural as for some unknown reason when men get tired they tend to get an erection.
though a man can get an erction and not even be mentaly turned on sometimes it just wakes up and at the most embrassing times
One commit that was made was that a person thought the brain was the biggest sexual organ in the body. Well you are right only 10 percent of sexuality is in the genitals the rest is all going on in their brain.
One last thing the male penis is the most stupid organ, give it any sort of attention ( other than the fore mentioned adjustment) and it will want to pop up thinking its play time, it just love's attention and it really isn't particular about what attention it gets.
I know a man who almost constantly drives his whole hand deep into his trousers to apparently arrange things stored down there, in full view of anyone who could be watching. I simply don't know if he's aware of it, and I don't have the guts to ask him...
As for our dangling article, it's still the best thing we have to express what is in our hearts. Sure, our eyes, lips and fingers can become experts at pleasing our loved one, but our tool in it's special haven is what makes that sense of internal completion occur, over and over again.
The comments could be about three hubs, all by themselves!!
I enjoyed this hub, and the comments, a lot. Y'all take care now, y'hear?
Well, as a recently newly wed (38 and my first marriage), it was very alarming and distracting to see my husband play with his penis whenever he is naked. he loves to be naked at home. I know he can do it because he can. I acatually think he enjoys touching himself more that me....The hand wins....i can't have sex with him anymore because I keep seeing his hand playing with his penis or testicles. It's quite off putting!
PrintShare it! — Rate it: up down flag this hub
Comments
maybe someone can design a special little slingbag for them to put their little packages in
Sexist Bgamall, very sexist. Most men can't keep up with our sex drive and definitely not with the sex-drive of a nympho. Which is why you always hear men speaking about nymphos in hushed voices as they are in awe.
wow really a nice hub
Good hub! Does anyone remember those "pamper" shorts of the 1970's? I just hated it when the you know what seems to hang out from the back when the wearer would bend to pick up something from the floor.
What a terrible predicament!
Is it appropriate to ask "How's it hanging?"
Sorry, if my comments are too rude.
Ha! love this hub. I must admit the word penises grabbed my attention from the get go.
heheh what ur talking about watch here a good thing which will make u huh :) www.madnites.com
haha C.C. Riter the story about your pecker made me smile. LOL but with a nice story line. Movie of the week the Reader followed by incredible Adventures of Pecker. hehe.
Unless you have interviewed every man on the planet and gathered the survey results it is erroneous to state that all males fondle themselves. During the day it is normal for the penis to become erect 9 - 10 times. This keeps the tissues elastic. It is an autonomic function. As a young boy this occurance could feel rather strange. You might want to look at hormonal development and the energetic qualities of the sexual area.
I remember a time of being curious when I was young but never as much as you describe. I also remember the girls being as equally as interested as well.
raven you would enoy my pains, haha. Now Geature, it dint feel strange to me, felt pretty good, not elstic for me either, felt like steel and it throbbed like hell too. Oh yeah, the girls love 'em.
We play & fondle with our penises because we can. It is as simple as that. We love feeling them and peeing outside with them.
Sech a mystery! The pecker gets pecked on again, and again. Why not evolve super quickly so that it will fall off after the last desired child is born. Both a curse and a blessing, we won't be constantly plagued by its insistent demand for pleasure, and women won't get plugged by it's insatiable yearning for insertion.
AEvans says:
8 months ago
You have some very valid questions and I don't know why they do it either, I believe as a mom of a son, he believes he is going to lose it...lolololo , your article is funny and maybe we could get a gracious gentleman to answer this mystical question. :)