Financial problems are among the top reasons for divorce/separation. While keeping up with the Jones' many of us forget that the diminishing cash flow is far worse than not having those expensive toys and fancy house. If you really want to have those things without living in constant fear of having no money then I suggest you start reading Suze Orman's books on finance. She suggests that we are lying to ourselves and the general public when our credit cards are charged to the hilt and we have two car loans and a huge mortgage. Nothing could be more true. When cash flow is ever shrinking more stress is bound to occur for both parties in a marriage or other partnership.

1. Communication, as a result of being way too busy working two jobs or overtime or whatever the case may be.

2. Sex drive, the man or woman or both will experience lack of intimacy from each other or towards each other as a result of communication breakdown and stress from now that and money trouble. Men may feel that it takes too much energy to try to please a woman and think about the problems with the finances too, and women may take this wrong and interpret the lack of interest as being intentional. As a result of emotions taking over, when the man has the energy to invest in her, she may not want to because of lack of emotional connection.

3. Hopes and dreams, while finances, communication lines and our sex lives are going down the toilet, it can become very discouraging. The plans we may have for retirement and living life as a happy couple until we're gone can turn into pie in the sky fantasies! How can we possibly do ANYTHING other than work ourselves to death and die insolvent?

Here are two scenarios:

Renting a home - chances are that you have tons of credit card debt, one to two car loans and possibly a high rent payment. The thing to do is sit down together and write down each and every expense and liability you have, start by cutting corners wherever possible (ie: cheaper groceries, less hair care products and spa visits, whatever applies to you). Stop spending all together (spending in this case would be adding new purchases to your collection). Then sell any vehicles with liablility attached, pay off your loans and use extra for second hand vehicles. Credit score providing consolodate your credit card and line of credit debts into one payment. If your credit is bad, and you cannot borrow any more money, then put all the debts on a payment schedule (cut the cards up to stave off temptation to spend). If you are still struggling with the rent and the payments and cutting corners, then it is possible that you are paying too much rent for a nice place to live. Move to an apartment with a cheaper price tag. Once debts are paid off, then start setting new goals and attaining them.

You are a homeowner - invite a realtor to your home, explain that you may not even be selling at this point, you simply want to know how much you can sell your home for (explain your situation and they will understand). If it turns out that you have enough equity to pay off your debts (Mortgage, credit cards and whatever else you have), then it may be worth it to sell that house, pay off the debts and rent a house instead (depending on cost). After that has been accomplished, re-evaluate your situation. Then proceed as the renter scenario above states.

But I am a firm believer in what she has to say. I have been in a situation or two involving money problems and I know that if you truly love your husband or wife or partner or however you want to say it, then it's safe to say that money problems, especially ones that can be solved could end your relationship indefinately! When we think about the sacrifices its going to take to rectify the problem, it can seem daunting, however; what's worse? A little sacrifice to pay off big in the long run, or a divorce from the one you love so much? I've chosen the latter :)