If you've ever had coffee at a Starbucks, you know they have their own unique language. Of coffee, that is. You can tell the regulars by their ease of ordering; they speak fluently and the baristas understand what they want and make their drink perfectly.

Then there are the regular people. Us folks who can't speak Starbucks and stutter over what we want, stumbling over sizes, wanting to ask questions, maybe asking for the exact same thing as the girl in front of you or paying off some yuppie college kid to translate for you so the coffee slingers don't spit in your whip.

Here's a crash course in ordering.

#1. Hot or Iced?This is the step I frequently forget, which is alright at Starbucks because I usually like my drink hot, but not okay at other shops (Tiny's) because some (Tiny's) automatically make their drinks iced in summertime when the customer does not specify hot or iced, A nice barista will ask just to confirm, but don't count on it, so specify HOT or ICED after the size when ordering. For example. "Hi, I would like a Hot %$%&^%^#@&@^".

#2. Strength.This makes your drink your own. You can skip this step, and they will make the drink according to menu. This is 1 shot (of espresso) for short and tall drinks, and two shots for grande and venti drinks. You can add as many shots as you want.

• Single. One shot of espresso.
• Double. Two shots of espresso.
• Triple. Three shots of espresso.
• Quad. Four shots of espresso.

Customize your drink by asking for a specific number of shots. Example: "I would like a Hot Triple .... "

#3. Size Matters.  At regular coffee shop (like any fast food restaurant or store) the sizes are listed in OUNCES. At Starbucks, there are code names for their sizes. Defined they are:

Short. 8 oz. Most coffee shops' small.

Tall. 12 oz. A Starbucks "small". Most other coffee shops' "medium".

Grande. 16 oz. A Starbucks "medium. Most other coffee shops' "large".

Venti. 20 oz (hot drinks) 24 oz (iced drinks). Like half a big gulp.

Example: I would like a Hot Triple Grande .... "

#4. Got milk? If you don't want 2% cow's milk in your coffee (if it requires milk) then TELL THEM! Choices (generally) include:

• Nonfat (fat free)
• 1%
• 2% (default at Starbucks)
• Whole Milk
• Breve (half & half)
• Soy
• Fat Free Soy / Almond Milk / Rice Milk VARIES BY LOCATION

Your drink is now: "I would like a Hot Triple Grande Six Pump Nonfat.... "

#5. Flavour.As far as syrup goes, you can order a drink in whatever flavours they have available. These generally are: Vanilla, Caramel, Toffee Nut, Cinnamon Dolce, Hazelnut, Irish creme, almond, mint, and raspberry. Gingerbread syrup (YUMMY) is available around Xmas time. This is how much syrup comes in each size generally:

• Short - two pumps of syrup.
• Tall - three pumps of syrup.
• Grande - four pumps of syrup.
• Venti (hot) - five pumps of syrup.
• Venti (iced) - six pumps of syrup.

OK, so specify NUMBER OF PUMPS (if different than normal) then FLAVOUR.

You can ordering however much syrup you want in your drink by asking for X pumps of syrup. Example: "I would like a Hot Triple Grande Six Pump Nonfat Vanilla .... "

#6. Wet or Dry? (ONLY FOR CAPPUCINOS & LATTES / DRINKS WITH FOAM)

• Wet : More milk, less foam.
• Dry : More foam, less milk.

#7. The Drink! This is where it gets difficult. You have to choose your main course, what you want to drink. It's kind of like when you're ten years old and in the candy store and can only pick one piece.

• Coffee - brewed coffee, "drip". They usually have a coffee of the day and then a regular choice. Usually a stronger, darker roast, and a milder roast.
• Latte - espresso and steamed milk. You can add syrups or shots (if you don't want the normal for your size, explained earlier). Be sure to specify milk (whole, fat free, 1%, soy, rice, etc.) or they will make it with 2% cows milk.
• Americano- espresso and hot water. It is similar to drip coffee but actually dilluted espresso (very strong brewed coffee). Fancy (& more delicious) "regular" coffee.
• Espresso Con Panna - espresso with whipped cream. "con panna" is Italian for "with cream". You order con pannas by number of shots (single, double, or triple) rather than size (tall, grande, venti).
• Espresso Machiatto - espresso with a small spoon of foamed milk on the top. "Machiatto" is Italian for "marked", as a properly prepared drink should have just a touch of foam.
• Caramel Machiatto- Not really like an espresso machiatto, despite the name. It's more like a "vanilla latte" with caramel sauce (not syrup) drizzled on the top.
• Misto- aka "cafe au lait" aka brewed coffee with steamed milk. My mother calls it "coffee milk".
• Cappuccino - An espresso drink that is 1/3 espresso, 1/3 steamed milk, and 1/3 foamed milk (on top). Powdered cinnamon or cocoa can be sprinkled on the top as a garnish.
• Frappuccino- a Starbucks original. It's a blended iced beverage with a creme and/or coffee base. (cannot be made with soy) The flavours vary but come in coffee (caramel, java chip, mocha, coffee) or creme (chai, vanilla, strawberry, etc.)
• Mocha - espresso and steamed milk with chocolate syrup, served with whipped cream on top.
• White Mocha - Same as a "Mocha" but with whitechocolate syrup. (a smidge sweeter than a regular mocha).

(starbucks also serves "kid drinks" aka short hot cocoa/ cider/ tea NOT COFFEE)

YOU'RE DONE!!! Example: "I would like a Hot Triple Grande Six Pump Nonfat Vanilla LATTE!"

Wait... What costs? Extra shots, extra syrup, soy milk and breve costs extra. (usually 30 - 50 cents extra each). Whipped cream (on top), cream (in coffee) and nonfat or 1% or whole milk is free. Energy shots or protein (available in smoothies and some drinks) is 55cents (about) extra.

Soooo...I hope this guide helps you to order like a pro (or at least not a fool) at Starbucks across the globe. You can use this for other coffee shops too - except forget the size names, shots per size and pumps of syrup per size, when you order specify EVERYTHING.

GOOD LUCK!!!!

xoxoOOHLIVIA