Stop Fighting Parents - Our kids are watching us

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By soni2006


How long are we going to pacify ourselves by saying but for his smoking, drinking and chewing habits, my father is a great man. How long are we going to appease ourselves by saying let us not look at the character of our teacher - that is a matter of his personal life; let us just take the teachings and leave it at that. How long are we going to mollify ourselves by saying but for his weakness for women, he is a wonderful person to work with.

I am no global judge to decide what is right and what is wrong. I also know there are no universal rights and wrongs. Who am I to infringe into anybody's freedom of choice? But ask yourself the courageous question, "Will I be happy if my children take up to what I think is okay for me? Will I ever be able to say that I am proud of myself, for I pursue these habits? Are my character traits worthy of emulation? Is my life an example or a warning to the next generation - not selectively, but holistically?"

Our children are watching us all the time. They learn much more by what they see than what they hear. Moral science is never learnt from books, but by watching those who live around us. You have to show your children what to do instead of only telling them what to do. The world will follow your examples and not your advice. Freedom without responsibility is licentiousness. As much as you desire the freedom of your life, you have an equal or higher responsibility towards the next generation.


Do not fight in front of your kids.
Do not fight in front of your kids.

Stop doing what shouldn't be done and set an ideal in front of your kids

The spiritual truth is that once a master has attained silence, he has attained the object of meditation and thus no longer requires the sadhana. But the ignorant seeker would argue, "When the master does not meditate regularly, I needn't too. Why shouldn't I emulate his actions instead of following his words?" The Bhagavad Gita (Indian Holy Book) therefore reminds, "Whatever a great man does others will imitate. Whatever standards he sets, the world will follow." We got to do certain things for the sake of others, so that our actions inspire them, irrespective of our intellectual reasoning. We have a social responsibility. We have the responsibility to be a worthy role model. Do what must be done, and stop doing what shouldn't be done.

As a teacher, a boss, the pioneer in the industry, a parent, as the head of the family, one holding the government office... you, me and all of us have to live in ways that sets standards for others to follow. Think, talk, act, and live the way you want others to think, talk, act and live.

Over a period of time, the world around you tends to become carbon copies of you. Then for sure, you need to be a master-copy worth duplicating.

Our kids are watching us all the time in the News

How to raise kids?

  • Little House of Indoctrination

    Dan and I are not good at Netflix. We put a bunch of stuff in our queue and forget about it until we’re ready to watch a movie. Then we open up the red envelope and find that we’ve gotten some lame, stupid movie that neither of us admits to actually adding to our queue. When I’m stressed or anxious, we always end up with something scary or action-packed. When we’re feeling romantic, we end up with a kids’ movie. We cannot plan it right to save our lives. read more - 10 hours ago

  • The Joys (and Pains!) of Kinky, Curly Black Girl Hair

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  • I have no idea. Do you?

    I'm not a very observant mom. Actually, a better way to put that is: I am not observant AT ALL. I'm rarely the first person to notice if one of my kids has a bump or a scratch, and when I'm in the throes of dealing with a whiny, unhappy kid, it hardly ever occurs to me that he might not be feeling well. I'm much more apt to assume he's just being a brat. I know, I know. That's, like, forty Mom Demerits. read more - 7 days ago

  • A Note to the Halloween Witch

    For the last two years we’ve adopted the tradition of sacrificing our sugary goods to earn the good graces and fabulous gifts of the Halloween Witch. She flies through the night sky two days after Halloween, collecting all treats that have not yet been consumed by the children of the land to add to her sticky, sugary, tooth-destroying stash. In return for these leftover treats, she leaves a toy for each child who gives up his or her candy completely. read more - 7 days ago

  • Forty Is Not the New Thirty. Thankfully!

    First, let me thank you for all of your sweet words and concern for my daughter. She is not back to one hundred percent health yet, but they felt she was healing enough to avoid putting her through too many tests that may or may not find answers when they see her on the upswing. She is still fatigued and suffers from headaches but we are keeping a close eye on her. Thank you for the kindness you showed me after my last post. It means a lot to me! read more - 9 days ago

  • Hello. My name is Denene Millner, and I’m a screamer.

    I don’t mean to holler and yell like a banshee when my kids get out of line. It just, like, happens. Usually, I yell after I’ve asked them nicely five times to do something -- like move their crap off the kitchen table or straighten up their rooms or go to sleep already because it’s 10:30 p.m. and I put you in your bed two hours ago and I’m tired, dammit, and I want to give your father some so that I can pass out from exhaustion. read more - 2 weeks ago

  • The floors would be shinier if someone else cleaned them.

    This week I will let a strange man into my house when my husband isn't home. I will greet him with heaps upon heaps of kisses and shouts of delight because he will be bearing gifts of mops and sponges and environmentally-friendly cleaning supplies. He is coming over to CLEAN MY HOUSE. read more - 2 weeks ago

  • Glad I’m Not a Celebrity Mom

    I shop at the grocery store, so I have lots of time to contemplate what my life would be like if I were a celebrity mom. I’ve decided I’m against it, and I will tell you why. read more - 2 weeks ago

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