From the moment she ascends through the smoke during her opening number “Bad Influence”, Alecia Moore, better known by her stage name P!nk, is dead serious about being apotheosized as the greatest living performer. As she exudes confidence and flashes her million dollar smile from high above, multitudes of ebullient fans crane their neck to savor the pop idol in her fullest glory. Make no mistake: this wouldn’t be the only time in the 2 hour extravaganza that P!nk brings the highlights of her show some 20 feet high.

After a confessionary 4 minutes about her unabashed love for partying, the show segues into the rock and roll segment. Here, the powerhouse singer showcases her array of unforgettable hits, preferring to impress with her vocal skills in “Just Like A Pill”, “Don’t Let Me Get Me” and “Who Knew”. Her versatility to double up as both a pop performer and rock musician is intriguing. This perfect blend is what makes her a bona fide superstar.

It’s a known fact: sex sells. It’s no surprise then that P!nk would relish a quiet moment to frolic and gyrate herself on a sofa, as she sings a rendition of Divinyl’s classic “I Touch Myself”, an ode to self pleasuring. Except, she’s not alone. Her pleasuring act is consummated with three additional pairs of hands. Racy, very racy. Perhaps she should change the lyrics to “We Touch Myself”.

The risqué performance ended too soon. But P!nk is a smart one. Still clad in (only) a lacy black bra from waist up, she croons her mid tempo single, “Please Don’t Leave Me”. Her revealing outfit, dare I say, is very flattering. She has no qualms about flaunting her toned midriff, and why would she? Her flat stomach is the result of an intensive workout comprising of hours of yoga, gym time and cardiovascular exercises.

There’s nothing quite like the experience of singing alongside some 15,000 roaring fans. “So What” and “U + Ur Hand” are the obvious fan favorites, as fans in the seated sections leap to their feet to dance to the rhythms. In “Leave Me Alone”, P!nk implores her fans to “get terrible”, channel their dorky selves, and put on their worst dancing ever. Find me another celebrity who would urge his fans to do the same.

Here’s what you have to understand about P!nk: she doesn’t fit into the mold of a perfected pop celebrity. During her quieter and more somber segment of the show, she performs “I Don’t Believe You”, a sappy ballad about an estranged relationship. Equipped with a guitar, she often stops the song performance midway, confessing that she’s all but forgotten the lyrics. Loud mouthed, she has almost zilch regards for social decorum. She prefers to address her fans with an interesting choice of profanity. She lavishly flips the bird in “Funhouse”, as if the gesture is worked into her dance choreography.

In what is the most poignant moment of the show, P!nk performs “Family Portrait”, her most personal song to date. The stage is stripped of the iridescent lights and a barefooted P!nk is backed only by a pianist and a violinist. The triumvirate delivers an emotionally charged performance.

Everyone has his own Funhouse tour highlights, and for me, it’s her performance of Sober. Aerial stunts and acrobatics have become a trademark of P!nk’s shows in recent years, cementing her status as a daredevil performer. Preceded by a somber dance and musical interlude, the phenomenal performance begins with a blindfolded P!nk. Putting her gymnast background to good use, she manages a few gravity-defying flips, while – get this – singing live. The performance culminates in a final jump off her trapeze, and she lands safely into the hands of her hunky acrobat. She sings the last verse of the song, all the while flying across the ceiling.

What is baffling is her ability to sound pitch perfect even as she dangles upside down, begging the question: Is she lip-synching? I’m here to save you from possible harassment from berated fans; the answer is no. She doesn’t even use a backing track; she has background singers to do the deeds.

Equally enthralling is her performance of one of her earliest hits, “Get the Party Started”. The song has become a staple in her tour set lists. She sings, “I’m coming up! I’m coming!” and true to her words, she is hoisted once again into midair. Up, up, she goes, and at the peak of the arena, she plunges, head first, before proceeding to exult in some undoubtedly nauseating stunts. Upon reaching ground earth, she sprawls on the stage, taking a moment to regain her composure.

Choosing to close the show with “Glitter in the Air” is ingenious. A soft ballad about the simplest joys in life, the performance is reminiscent of a music box in motion. P!nk’s dancers twirl in midair before being joined by the artiste herself. During the song’s bridge, P!nk is immersed in water, soaking and dripping wet. The entire performance is an exquisite visual treat.

To say that p!nk ranks in the stratosphere of any music great is unfitting. No other artiste, living or dead, can or has done what she does. She has certainly raised the bar, not just for her counterparts but for herself as well.

The Funhouse Tour promises all the magnitude of an intricately designed pop concert; dazzling and intoxicating, while retaining the rawness of a rock show. P!nk’s Live in Australia DVD is now out in stores. For those of you who had the privilege of seeing her in person, this is a nice little memento to relive her brilliance, on repeat. For those of you yet to catch on the P!nk fever, this is a must have item. You don’t know what you’re missing out on! I would tell you to attend her concert in person, but last I checked, all her tickets are already sold out.

About the author: XY Boon has had his right thumb grabbed by P!nk on 13^th August 2009. The said thumb is now encased and divinely enshrined in a sanctuary.

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