Let's face it, life isn't easy and it certainly isn't fair. But most of us have the emotional strength and life experience to realize this and still make "a go of it". Unfortunately, teenagers are caught in a very difficult predicament. They are intelligent enough to understand that life isn't easy or fair, but they do not have the life experience or emotional strength to cope with the discovery.

Being a teenager has never been simple. The teenage years are those of which many potential life changing decisions are made. Some more obvious than others, but still all the same when it comes to premise of character in adulthood.

Although most individuals will have basic morals and values instilled during childhood, it is during the teen years that these lessons are tested. The parent essentially can do nothing but hope their child will "pass" the test, so to speak. Teens will be tested in a variety of lessons. Including, but not limited to: greed, lust, willpower, faith, degradation, deceit, aggressive behavior, and temptation. How the teen reacts with their words, their actions or in-actions will become the foundation of their character.

The key is to ensure that your teenager is reacting with their true self, rather than their emotional self. This is where it gets tricky. It takes time and practice to have emotional strength; which is essentially emotional control.

When reacting with the emotional self, our responses are manipulated and driven by the strongest emotion at the time. Often, for adults and teenagers alike, this is not an effective reaction, as it can exacerbate the situation or create more complications based on the behavior of one "emotion on a rampage"

When reacting with the true self, our responses are generated by all emotion, intellect, belief system, and past experience. When a situation occurs, and we find ourselves trapped in emotion, we must allow ourself time (it really is a matter of seconds) to process ALL of our emotions then blend those with our thought process and belief system.

Teenagers have faced the same stereotypical criticisms throughout the decades. With each generation obviously having some unique qualities and differences, there is still a very common perception that has not swayed over the years.

Below are some common questions that fall into this "typical teenager" behavior. Following each question are suggested answers.

Q. Why do teenagers think they know it all?

A. Simply put, most teens who suffer from "know it all" syndrome, actually suffer from "I believe I know enough and you have nothing new to tell me" syndrome.  Independence is difficult to achieve when one is always being told what to do and how to do it. 

Q. Why are teenagers so rude? (as if they are the only ones)

A. Unfortunately, society no longer insists upon the unwritten law of respecting your elders. In fact, society is guilty of allowing rudeness, disrespect, and poor manners to be acceptable. It is not only acceptable, but it has become a fascinating and profitable display of entertainment.

A. Some teenagers are only rude when they feel they are the recipient of the same behavior. Tit for Tat. Many adults are more than willing to be very rude to a teenager with the expectation of respect in return. Hmmm..........

Q. Why are teenagers so mean?

A. First off, children have a tendency to be mean and not understand the full effect of their actions. The parent or caregiver then tries to help the child understand.  An average teenager, knows the effect of their actions and is behaving in what is considered a mean way in order to make those effects a reality. Same thing for adults. Mean is mean; no matter if your a teenager or an adult. When someone is being mean, they are self projecting. They are reacting with their emotional self.

Every teenager is an individual and should be viewed as such. They are on the verge of independence, self discovery, and a reality in which they must be accountable for their actions, successes and failures. They have also just discovered all of the horrors of the real world that we tried to shield them from as children.

Essentially teenagers are adults without the privileges and punishments. Their bodies are that of adults and their intelligence is comparable or the same as many adults. But, they lack the emotional strength and life experience necessary to effectively function as an adult.

No wonder teenagers and the term angst are used together so often. They find themselves constantly walking the tightrope of adulthood, knowing they will fall in the beginning. Believing that eventually they will make it across, but find themselves conflicted by the reality of not really wanting to.