Why Didn't I get a Chance?
73First thing I want to say is this. If you had an abortion and are feeling guilty about it, there is someone who wants to help you overcome your guilt. If you are pregnant and are thinking of having an abortion, please read this whole article and think about what you are planning on doing. It is very important to make sure you know everything you can before making such a life changing decision.
There is a photo that is very graphic just below this section. It shows a baby who was the victim of a partial birth abortion. I also want to state here that I did take some creative liberty in writing the first part of this article. The idea to write this came from a comment that Eddie Perkins left on another hub. I appreciate my brother in Christ so much that words can hardly express.
Let the Children Come
Mar 10:14 But when Jesus saw it, he was much displeased, and said unto them, Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.
We are to be like little children. What does he mean by little children? Is He talking of teenagers who are rebellious almost constantly? Is He talking about those who are almost teens who lie and do things behind their parents back?
Just imagine, God has a mansion for you and you abort your baby. You come before God and he says, "I had your place all fixed up just the way you like it. Furniture in the right place and everything you can imagine that you like. But look over here at this child. Do you recognize it? It is the very one that you had aborted. He now has your mansion. There is no room for you here."
Maybe you think God will let you slide, after all no one showed you scientific proof that God doesn't like abortion. Doctors say that the fetus is not an actual person with a personality, heartbeat, brain functions etc. . . Surely doctors can't be wrong about such things and those fundamental Christians don't know everything anyway. They only preach hate speeches and things like that. They make me feel guilty when they talk about my need to repent. God you made me this way and I am only what He made me to be.
I wonder if any of this strikes a chord with anyone. To tell you the truth, some of this struck a chord with me a few years ago. I didn't abort a baby, but I was just as lost as anyone can be. Abortion is a sin just as telling a lie is a sin. The biggest problem is that abortion weighs heavily on the soul of the person who had a baby aborted.
I know God most likely won't say that to you. He is a forgiving and merciful God, but many believe they can do whatever they want and God is ok with it. They will lie, cheat, steal, rape, murder, etc. . . and expect God to allow them into heaven. They don't want righteousness nor anything to do with living a holy life before God blameless. Many say they would rather own up to their own sins and carry them alone than to allow Jesus to carry the burden.
Sin and Death
Rom 5:12 Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:
There isn't a man or woman alive today who hasn't sinned. Sin entered into the world by Adam, and each descendant of Adam is born in sin. This includes you also my friend. Sin is what separated Adam from God and it separates us from God also. It makes no difference what your morals are. It makes no difference how great others believe you to be. You are still a sinner born in flesh and will be a sinner until the time that you accept Jesus as your Savior.
Rom 5:14 Nevertheless death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over them that had not sinned after the similitude of Adam's transgression, who is the figure of him that was to come.
The Word of God states that death reigns over all sinners. By the transgression of Adam, death entered. Before the transgression, there was no death. Maybe you think Adam got a bum deal. Maybe you think God should have shown some leniency and mercy. God did show mercy to Adam. He didn't destroy him right then and there. He even killed two animals to make skins for Adam and Eve to cover their nakedness. I ask you friend, what covers your nakedness?
Rom 5:21 That as sin hath reigned unto death, even so might grace reign through righteousness unto eternal life by Jesus Christ our Lord.
The Word of God also states that grace through righteousness reigns over death. But who is righteous? (Rom 3:10 As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:) I ask again, who is righteous? None are righteous according to the law. So how can a person obtain righteousness? The answer is in the Word of God. (Rom 3:21 But now the righteousness of God without the law is manifested, being witnessed by the law and the prophets; Rom 3:22 Even the righteousness of God which is by faith of Jesus Christ unto all and upon all them that believe: for there is no difference:) Righteousness comes through faith in Jesus Christ. It is the only way anyone can obtain righteousness.
Back to the baby who was aborted. We may never know, but some of the babies who have been aborted may have been ordained to be President of the United States. Maybe make a big difference in world hunger. Maybe the scientist that would discover the cure to all forms of cancer. There is no way for us to know what great minds we may have terminated because we decided we didn't want the burden of taking care of them.
Partial Birth Abortion Demo
Won't you Come
He can take the filthy garment and give you a robe of white
He can take away all your sins and give you a brand new life
He can set you on a solid rock where you'll be able to stand
His grace is enough to renew each and every man
Won't you come, won't you come
Give the burdens of your life to Him won't you come
Won't you come, won't you come
No one loves you like he does, won't you come.
He can take away your hard heart and give you a heart of flesh
No more your soul to wander in Jesus you'll find rest
He can take away all your fears and give you peace so sweet
Just come and bow before the Lord humbly at His feet
Won't you come, won't you come
Give the burdens of your life to Him won't you come
Won't you come, won't you come
No one loves you like he does, won't you come.
The Way
There is no other way for anyone to be saved from their sins. Jesus is the way that God ordained. (Act 4:11 This is the stone which was set at nought of you builders, which is become the head of the corner. Act 4:12 Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.) Jesus is the cornerstone which was rejected by the builders. Any other foundation is not a solid steady foundation.
In my work in construction, I have realized how important a foundation is to a house. If the foundation fails, the whole house will be damaged, many times beyond repair. What is the foundation that your faith is built upon? Who upholds you in times of trial and tribulation? Jesus desires to hold you and make your walk steady. He desires to save your soul from the hell that was created for the devil and his angels.
I friend wrote an article which shows how things came to be in this nation over the last few decades. I would appreciate it if you read The Prince of Darkness.
I realize the sensitive nature of this article. I also realize that it is an article that trolls could have a field day with if allowed. For these reasons all comments will be moderated by me.
Cry out to Jesus by Third Day
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Comments
I don't understand what you mean by your comment Storyteller. Not a sentence I wrote put blame on anyone at all. There are lots of articles which condemn those who have abortions. There are lots of articles which say it's OK to murder a baby. This was written to help those who had abortions or are thinking of having an abortion.
While many say don't listen to your conscience, listen to scientists and/or Doctors, lots of young girls are having abortions but feel guilty afterwards. Who helps them with their guilt? There are some who will say, "It wasn't a real person." According to the picture posted above, the baby was almost fully developed.
It is time we start letting guilt flow through those who have abortions. Then they can be healed. if there is no guilt or the guilt is overridden long enough, nothing will make anyone feel guilty about anything.
Sir Dent,
this is a great hub. I don’t know what I may have said to inspire it, but praise God you wrote it. I understand exactly what you are saying.
It is very sad when we are led to believe that something is perfectly all right which leads us to do something we may regret the rest of our lives. The good news as you show here is that God brings us to conviction, confession and forgiveness.
Thank you my brother. ~ eddie
PS I’ve heard more women speak out on this issue than men.
Eddie you always inspire me to write or do something. A comment you made on VPs hub is what inspired me to write this. This is a message of hope for those who have been through it or thinking of going through it. I am glad you were able to see that.
1Jo 3:20 For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things.
thought there was a certain time they couldnt do abortions,,,, these babies looked like they were past that time so yes they shouldnt have been aborted,,,,,but a man cant comment on what it is to go thru one cause they cant go thru it,,,,
You are right Silly. A man can't get an abortion. A man can feel guilty for other things though. Killing is killing. Murder is murder. Even for a murderer there is hope.
SirDent, That breaks my heart as our son is adopted why do people do this? Life is so precious that baby never had a chance to live. If they don't want children there are ways to avoid it. It is called abstinence or birht control, I wonder what that mother felt when she went through this, why did she wait so long? Oh it hurts my heart and I wish this would not be allowed. Good hub and you brought that home.:)
Yes AEvans. life is precious. I appreciate the read and comment. I can understand how your heart aches also for those that have been aborted. I know birth control doesn't work 100% of the time, but abstinence always works.
Tragic pictures, very hard to look at.
SirDent, There should be more abstinence as it is so hard for me to understand and I am a nurse, I see death everyday but I still cry when someone dies and I cry with the families who lose a loved one, as life is so precious to me. I am so thankful for having such a kind spirit, this article speaks the truth:)
I totally agree with this Hub Sir Dent, and I think you have worded it very well. I speak as someone who had a pregnancy termination at 9 weeks pregnant, and both my Husband and I bitterly regretted it and still do.
The circumstances were not ideal, we owed loads of money, were in rented accommodation, and my family were not supportive and didn't want us to have a baby. His family were far away, and the pressure got too much. The worst thing was that I wasn't supposed to be able to get pregnant at all, so when it happened it was a complete shock.
It changed me drastically, and I now desperately want a baby, but nearly 2 years on have still not got pregnant again. Perhaps that is all I deserve after throwing back the gift God sent to me!
I have actually got a Hub about my Desperate for a Baby Diary, that is how much I now want one. Unfortunately I am running out of time at the age of 38, and the fertility specialist thinks my chances of getting pregnant without IVF are virtually non-existent, yet we cannot afford the IVF.
I just hope another miracle happens, as there is no way on earth either of us would ever consider another pregnancy termination if it does.
I'm prolife myself, so I understand why it's such a strong conviction for those who are as I am. I also understand Storyteller's opinion too, because honestly I think it's more the man's fault in this scenario than the womans. Heck....there are what, thousands o types of birth controls out there, right? Other than rape or incest, seriously....don't people realise that???
I have mixed feelings on it. I was raised a Catholic and was a Catholic Priest but I believe more and more its a womans choice but at the same time I do not believe Abortion should be used as a form of birth control. I also believe a baby is a human being at the moment of conception. Bottomline I believe Abortion should be much more rare than it is.
Misy, I appreciate your comment very much. I am also sorry to hear about your dilemma. Just relax and stop thinking about it so much. My wife was told she would never get pregnant. My son is now almost 12 years old.
Thank you Sir Dent, I really appreciate your reply and it means a lot to me.
Tkeeley I understand what you are saying, but abstinence is what it takes to not get pregnant. We have allowed things to go too far now and a lot of it started in the 60's with the love ins and drugs. I know many will hate for me to write that, but it's true. Nevertheless, this hub is about hope for those who have gone through it or are thinking about it. Many want a guarantee, but there is no gurarantee in this life for anyone. The only guarantee anyone can have is if they put their trust in Jesus Christ.
Crazyhorse, I appreciate the read and comment. I understand how feelings can be mixed, Been there planty of times myself.
Misty - I know an Indian couple(family friends) in US the guy was a Master's student and his wife was on dependant visa in USA. As Master student he was barely surviving to make both ends meet and his wife suddenly became pregnant but due to their financial situation they aborted the baby. Then they didn't have baby for 6 years then they adopted a baby from india. And then a miracle happened within 1 year of the adoption she got pregnant and now they treat both the daughters with same love.
Misty, I wrote this hub not to condemn anyone, but to give them hope. There is hope for everyone in Jesus Christ.
I can never forgive myself for letting our baby go, I even said I was sorry to the baby at the point before I had the termination. The pain this decision caused me still haunts me to this day, and I am still signed off work due to the repercussions of that decision on my emotional state.
Even my Husband built a shrine to the baby up by our lake.
Even my parents now understand. I just wish they had at the time I was pregnant so I could have felt the support and had our baby. I think they thought I would expect too much of them in terms of support when they were already pensioners with health problems and reasons that babysitting etc would be hard for them.
Misty, Jesus loves you. He will forgive you if you ask Him to. I understand that you feel guilt even still today. You don't have to feel guilty though. Jesus will take your guilt, but only if you let Him have it.
SirDet, first, I want you to know I appreciate your heart. Rather than speak to this directly, I will say that I do extensive volunteer computer work at a local Pro-life ministry... we have discovered that disturbing photos are not the most effective way to communicate ... What follows is the testimony from a friend of mine, and I believe it speaks for it self ...
---
The SECOND I had the abortion the enemy was right there saying "look what you just did, now you've killed and taken an innocent life! You will never go to heaven now! You have committed the worst of the ten commandments! You are going to hell!"
Well, between that heart chilling thought, and the church picketers outside of the abortion clinic, I was convinced this thought was true, I really was not wanted by God, I was a "dead woman walking".
I spent the next 11 years of my life believing I am going to hell and God does not want me. I was so ashamed. I also could not go to anyone for consolation or help, because there was no way I was going to let someone find out what I did! Women who have had abortions never get to be open about their grief, most feel like they do not even deserve to grieve over their unborn children. No matter how the child was lost, there is still grief. The world has allowed man to do something that should only be God's decision, He is the giver of life and death.
The guilt and shame, that heart chilling feeling, was unbearable at times. My problems with depression, drug and alcohol abuse, sexual promiscuity and fear intensified. I had a feeling of unsettlement, like a homeless feeling in my heart and mind.
When I turned 31, 11 years after the abortion, I finally told my mom what I had done. I always wanted to tell my parents, but I was always afraid. I still don't know why I did, but I did. She cried wishing I had told her. She said she would pray for me, but that just kept me silent, she didn't even realize that her daughter was going to hell. Then, a couple of weeks later, she sent me a tape of a sermon given by her pastor at the church she was attending.
I listened to this tape of the pastor telling me how women who have had miscarriages and abortions, would see their babies again in heaven. He also said that God not only wanted to forgive me, but also that He loved me and that He wanted to be with me forever!
Well, I received that message, and I cried for 2 hours, even laughed a little, relieved that my life wasn't over!!!
But their was still something missing. I would not go to God, the guilt and shame I carried was so great that I decided wasn't worthy. I remembered at a revival when I was 13, I was scared into asking Jesus into my heart, so at least I could get into heaven now.
The next year, I still was clueless that God had what I needed, that their was more to salvation. Then one summer at one of our usual family gatherings, one of my cousins was their, she hardly ever smiled, just not a happy person. But not today, she was smiling, and radiant, and she was even happy to see me!! This difference in her took me by surprise, then she was talking about how she got saved! WOW!! If God could do that to her, I wondered, what would He do for me? I wanted that peace and I wanted to smile like that, and I wanted to be radiant!
So at her invitation, I started going to church with her. In February 2001, I asked Jesus into my heart. Saved or not before, all I know is, that this time, I felt different, I LOVED God!! I wanted to be baptized again!! I wanted to know all I could!! I knew, there was more, and I had been missing out!!
I felt really safe and accepted at this church, and of course, by God, but all that changed a few months later. There was a day that was going to be celebrated, where people would stand with signs in their hands along designated streets in the city, which talk about Pro-Life and signs against abortion. A lady in the church stood up in front of the congregation that Sunday morning and said we need to support this, because "they are out their slaughtering and murdering babies". I fled from this church, crying and upset, crying out to God saying "I thought I was going to be loved, accepted, and safe Lord! I thought you brought me here, there is truly no church that will accept me anywhere!" This lady still does not have any idea what that statement did to me, she probably, like many, do not even think about the fact that many women like me go to their church. We ARE in your churches and we need healing! We need to know the truth about God's love, acceptance, and forgiveness through Jesus Christ. We need to know that we can lay our guilt and shame at the cross!!
---
This issue, like all issues must always be first addressed with love and understanding. Jesus heals and forgives.
Again, SirDent, I trust your heart, and appreciate your pursuit of righteousness.
I understand what you mean Bdazzler. The picture will stay on this hub though. What we need to preach is that the devil is a liar and Jesus is the truth. If the devil says you can't make it, you can put your money on it that you can make it.
They need to feel guilty about aborting a baby. I believe that with all my heart. At the same time they need to know that it is not the end. There is healing for them. Jesus Christ is the healing. He is the comforter.
I mean, sure abstinence is a guaranteed way of stopping abortion...but for crying out loud, what about the couple who doesn't want children? Are we going to tell them not to have sex? After all we've proven sex is a physical and emotional NEED of the human race. I'll leave the morality of marriage/premarital sex up to the individual, but even if it is immoral, it's not going to stop imperfect people from doing things we just naturally do. You can't stop sex, at least educate people in how to prevent unwanted procreation. My wife and I were using birth control for months after we got married because we didn't want children immediately. There's nothing wrong with that, but there's something rong in preventing the general right to having sex with your partner. THAT is wrong, and if people aren't educated on what sex even is (like many kids I grew up with that were either attending private schools or homeschooled) then of course there's going to be pregnancies abounding. The key is, at a worst case scenario, at least equiping everyone with the knowledge of preventing pregnancy. If everyone was able to do so, abortions would/should be much, much fewer and farther between.
Yes, I believe abortion is wrong. You can't however do wrong to prevent wrong, and in preventing it by controlling how much sex people do or do not have....well that's depravation of basic human rights, something America is supposed to support.
Speaking of American support, anyone else absolutely pissed that a man was trampled by selfish creeps at Walmart?
Tkeeley, in no way have I implied that sex between a man and his wife is wrong. Abortions are always bad and doctors have made it known that aborting babies is not wrong. It is definitely a moral issue. It should also be a legal issue. Murder is murder and is generally punishable by life imprisonment.
Even muderers have a chance with Jesus. That is the whole point of this hub. I would appreciate it if you would keep the debates out of the comments here. If I see any more that are debating, I will not approve them.
As far as the man getting trampled at Walmart, things like that have happened for years. I remember when cabbage patch dolls first came out women would ifhgt over them and there was most likely many other tiems that were fought over over the years. There are very few morals left in this world and no patience at all.
Wow, what hub and mix of opinions. I don't beleive in abortion at all--even if you can't afford to raise the child. I have seen in my life and in observations that God provides the needs to raise that child. That may be from the family that concieved it of adoting the child to someone who can financially raise the child. God provides! He knows everythigna dn everyone and he KNOWS about ones life way before you do. That child will be taken care of and learn the lessons it is to learn.
My story--I got prognat before my first marriage. That was difficult becaseu both the father and I had plans of going to college and all that. We dicided before we told anyone else that we would gt married and raise this child. We didn't know how we would, but tht the mistake was ours and we would eal with it. Only these things are NOT mistakes...not at all.
My mother paid for me to get an abortion---only I ended up staying at a firends hose for 3 days for her to calm down and KNOW that I would NOT get an abortion. Now my daughter is about to have her first child at the age of 32. What is I had that abortion--all those happy memories would not have happened. Who knows about the life of a child? They could be someone VERY important to someone or themselves or the world and you cannot just snuf out a life like that.
God always provides a means for every person--no matter their age or circumstances.
For those who have gone through this tough decision--remember God Loves Everyone and He already KNOWS you and your life before you live it. Forgivenenss works only if you can forgive yourself.
Agreed on the moral issue there, but I think there's a problem when you legislate morality, at least there's a strong inability to do so. If everyone has the same set of morals, it's a perfect idealistic scenario, but we just don't so it's difficult to control people when everyone has such different levelsa of morality. Morality without something dictating it is just morality, and to me it seems empty. But I wasn't saying you were implying abstinence in marriage, but I know people who do :) I think it's wrong to say birth control is wrong, but then there's always the cycle and people have used that for millennia to prevent children.
My wife is physically incapable of bearing children, something we're finding out to be more and more painful. I believe God can, possibly will open her womb, but at thios point it's been a struggle for the both of us. And I'd personally never consider an abortion, even if she was impregnated by rape.
Tkeeley, my wife also was unable to bear children, but yet she did in spite of it. God is able to give children to whom He will. About birth control, giving out more birth control actually tells teens that it is OK to have sex. As far it being legislated, that happened back in '73.
The truth is the truth no matter what. Truth is always absolute.
Stillsmilen, if you read this know that I denied your comment. it was flammatory and doesn't belong here. It also shows me that you didn't really read the article. If you want to play nice, you can come back and comment.
Sir Dent I agree with you on the fact that birth control only gives teens an excuse to have sex. I also will bring up the concept of that Cervical Cnacer preventative shot for teens and young girls. I think tht is wrong! It has killed more girls then prevent cancer of the cervix. It also takes the choice from the girl at a later date--they have no idea what this drug will do in the long run! They are playing with lives of young girls. I beleive it is the choice of the girl weather she gets that shot or not. Governement is going way overboard with this too.Making anyne take something just for a few isn't right either.
Abortion is not even close to a correct birth control method.
Ps. Btw I was looking forward to seeing what Sandy wanted to say and you deleting it like that is censorship. I was accused of that in one of my hubs, so I let it go and it put egg all over the poster's face--so to speak......Censorship makes hate and anger---so does "YOUR" opinion that it may be inflammatory when others may not see it that way.
As I stated in the hub LG, I will moderate comments. Call it cencorship or whatever you want. I call it trollish behavior. I agree that the government is going way overboard with this. Sandy can post in groups if she wants to make her point known to you also. I will not release her comment here.
LG this is not the time or place to talk about that. I said this is not a debate hub. I said it isn't up for debate. It is too sensitive for debating. I just wanted you ot know that.
Let me rephrase. The subject is not on topic here. It is another issue altogether.
The second part of my comment above was for you alone. Going back to what I said to you earlier today.
This hub is about healing or attempting to heal those who had gone through it before and those who are thinking about going through it. Everything else is off topic.
Birth control could be legislated since it's not a moral issue. They legislate other substances, so children under the age of 18 shouldn't even be allowed access to it--period. Since it's prescribed medication, it shouldn't be getting out that easily. Same with condoms, those would be handled similarly to cigarettes and alcohol. The concept is easy and simple, and it would work well, IMHO.
I appreciate this article and the stance taken for children. I have written a poem "http://hubpages.com/hub/MyOldSecretFriendGuilt" that I would love to link to your story. Is it possible to do that?
Psalmist, I appreciate the read and comment. I don't mind you putting my link on your hub.
I recently saw the movie Juno. It makes a good point. The girl ends up keeping her baby and giving it to a family in need. I cannot begin to pass judgement on someone who has an abortion, not my place. That is totally between them and God. However, there are plenty options out there besides abortion. There are some cases where people need abortions for medical reasons, which is between them and their doctor. I live my life by focusing on me, the best way to go for sure. I would not condemn a woman who has an abortion.
Thanks for the read and comment Sweetie. This was written not to condemn, but to show that there is hope for those who had been through it and for those who are thinking of doing it. Many of those who went through it feel a lot of guilt. Which actually is better than feeling nothing at all, but the guilt will eat away at them if not deatl with.
The movie Juno makes a good point about this. The girl ends up keeping her baby because she realizes it is alive. You should see if it you have not, it was actually a cute movie.
I have never seen that movie. Of course I don't watch a lot of movies. Maybe I will rent it and watch it soon.
I love movies. Book buff and movie buff extradionaire. That is why I am really good with trivia I suppose.
Not much on movies and such anymore. Seems like I have no time for reading hardly anymore either.
I could not live without either. So many good books and movies. It is who I am and I would never give up these pleasures for the world. Introverts need things like this I suppose.
"Juno" is a good movie. Though along with a right thing (girl keeping her pregnancy), it teaches irresponsibility. It shows that it's okay to give away your baby. I agree, sometimes it's better if a baby goes to a nice family than grows up being abused. But I think that young people should be more responsible in their lives. America makes it possible to raise a child, say in my state a young family with a child gets all kinds of benefits, including free health care, rent assistance, food stamps. We'll help, but young people should take responsibility as well.
SirDent you again gave an excellent hub, which touches hearts and minds. Thank you. Abortion is a murder of a God given miracle.
My friend got pregnant from her boy-friend and she told him. He told that he was sorry, but his another girl-friend also got pregnant from him and she told him first, so he already took a commitment to marry that first girl. He suggested that he would arrange an abortion for my friend and she agreed, because she was afraid to tell her mother that she was pregnant. No matter how hard I tried to persuade her to keep the baby, she went for abortion. She told that if her parents knew, they would throw her from the house. Her boy-friend paid for her abortion and married his other girl-friend because she happened to tell him about her pregnancy first. They had a still born baby. After some years my friend and her former boy-friend got together again, as after all she loved him and he realized that he loved her. As an irony, again both women (my friend and his wife) got pregnant almost at the same time. This time my friend said that she would keep the baby no matter what. When my friend's mother learnt about her pregnancy, she did threw her out of the house and my friend went to live with her old grandmother. Both women had girls. The man was taking care of both daughters. When the girls were five years old, he finally made a choice. He divorced his first wife with whom they were having a bad marriage anyway and married my friend and adopted his own daughter. My friend was getting pregnant from time to time during all the time of their relationship. All in all during 10 years she made about 10 mini-abortions on a very early stage (stimulating menstruation with medical electrical shock withing three weeks of conception). When their daughter was 12, my friend got pregnant and they decided to keep this baby. My friend had a miscarriage on the sixth month, the boy didn't survive. After this she never got pregnant again. They live in a good marriage in love, their daughter is 23 years old now. When we happen to talk with my friend about this story, she tells me how much she regrets about all abortions she made. It's a pity that people come to realize things when it's too late...
mistyhorizon2003
God forgives instantly when you ask His forgiveness. However, forgiving yourself is a challenge. You and your husband do not have to continue to mourn alone. Sir Dent's hub and some of the comments may help, but I also urge you to contact a Christian based crisis pregnancy center. There are many available. The one in our area is called Livingwell Medical Clinic. Their url is http://www.nccn.net/~ncvoice/Livingwell.html
They are strictly local but I am sure they can direct you to a clinic near you. They are there not only for those who are considering abortion, but also to help those who have had an abortion. I urge you to seek Christian counseling. Your chances of maintaining your own best health and of possibly having another child will be much better when you can truly forgive yourself, get over your anxiety, and look with hope to the future.
Meanwhile I am saying a prayer for you right now.
Ruevera, that a great story. I appreciate your comment very much.
John Juneau. your link and comment are very valuable and I appreciate them deeply. Thank you so much for visiting my hub and commenting.
Thanks John, my problem is that I live on small Island called Guernsey in the UK, and facilities such as the one you suggest are rare here. The pain is easier thesedays, but we still often think about how old our child would have been now if we had gone through with the pregnancy. In the meantime we shall keep trying in the hope we are blessed with another pregnancy before I get too old.
SirDent, this hub is wonderful. I can relate to it in a way because when I worked on the phych unit, I had many women on the unit that had had abortions and were there out of depression and some even tried to take their own lives. It broke my heart in ways I can't even explain. And many sought forgiveness from God, but the hardest thing for them was they had problems forgiving themselves. I tried to explain to them that once God forgives them, it's gone. As far was the east is from the west. Several would repeatedly ask forgiveness for God in prayer when we prayed. I tried to help them see that when they asked God for forgiveness the second, third, 100th time, God would say "Forgiveness for what?" because that had already been covered in Jesus' blood and God could no longer see it. But that it was them who had to forgive themselves. I have seen many healed through God's unconditional love. It was just that they had to get themselves to the point of forgiving themselves. I think that's a problem with a lot of us for any sin. God forgives so easily, but, we as humans don't forgive ourselves as God does. And when we don't let go of our sins when we give them to God, we weigh ourselves down and are not able to be free and happy in His love. Great job on this hub.
Misty, please know I am praying for you.
Misty, there is help is what John Juneau is saying with his comment. It is the very reason for this hub. I have denied many comamnts here that are of no good use to anyone and in fact are against the reason this hub was written.
Tinyteddy, I denied your comment because it will tend to make matters worse. I hope you understand, but if you don't, it is denied anyway.
ASU, I am glad you are back with us. I appreciate your comment very much. It is very helpful indeed for showing those who have been through this the love and grace of God.
A very familiar verse, to you I'm sure, is one of my favorites I liked to use when talking about this with the women I worked with:
"Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matthew 11:28-29)
It applies to all of us who need rest. I know I cling to this verse often.
Very good point and verse ASU.
Thank you ASU, your prayers are greatly appreciated.
Sir Dent, thank you too. John's comment was helpful to me, and really do appreciate his kind supportive words and his prayers also.
Believe me, I certainly have prayed for forgiveness on this many times, so I do sincerely hope God has forgiven me. Like John and ASU said though, the hardest part is forgiving yourself.
Though, I have to say, I don't agree with partial birth abortion at all.
Misty, I appreciate your comment very much. I am also glad that what John said helped you. Know that I am here or you can email me if you must and want help. I believe I have the confidence to say also that ASU and John would do the same.
Writer Rider, I denied your first comment because of the nature of it. I hope you undertsand. This hub is for healing not discussing issues. I warned in the first capsule that the photo was very graphic. I do appreciate your comment.
What is it for? You're discussing the issue of not having an abortion.
Actually no Write Rider. This hub is for healing of those who went through with an abortion. It is also to help those who are thinking of having an abortion.
Thanks Sir Dent, I shall certainly keep your kind offer in mind.
It's no problem Misty. It seems many times we lose sight of what our real purpose is. I have been guilty of it myself many times.
very good hub
Thanks Lgali
SirDent, I have another story. When I was in a hospital in a bed rest pregnant with my son, I got acquainted with a woman, Sonya, who was also expecting. She told me her story. Her mother got pregnant with her and went to have an abortion without telling her dad. They lived very poor, her mom was not stable, in and out of rehab, and she told that she didn't want to produce generations of alcoholics. Her dad somehow found out why she was gone, rushed there and got her out of abortarium literally by her hair. Her dad said that if they were able to feed themselves, they would be able to give a piece of bread to another mouth too. Then, after so many years her mom said that she couldn't imagine what she would do without Sonya. Sonya took care of her dad when he was dying, she was taking care of her aging mom and her mother was so happy to expect a grandchild from Sonya. Just to think that she could have been aborted!mistyhorizon, knowing how much you suffer from what was done, breaks my heart. But, please, think about it this way- other girls who may read your story will not do what you've done and this will help them. Think about how you can help others with your story and it might bring you peace to your soul.
Thank you very much for that heart warming testimony Ruevera.
Thank you ReuVera, They do say something good comes out of even the worst situations, and therefore if my experience does stop even one other person from having a pregnancy termination, then that will be the 'something good' that came out of it.
The full story in more detail is included in my hub 'My Desperate for a Baby Diary' if anyone wishes to read it, and it goes far deeper in to guilt I felt afterwards and how and why we made the wrong decision in the first place.
Misty, feel free to link your hub here if you want.
Thanks Sir Dent. The link is: http://hubpages.com/hub/My-Desparate-for-a-Baby-Di
I hope it helps to prevent further abortions and the pain that follows.
Great stuff. I really feel you have made some extremely valid points here. As for the comments left by countrywoman. A masters student should be knowledgeable enough to realize that there are consequences involved in having sex. If your not able to accept responsibility for your actions, you should practice abstinence. And since when does financial stability give someone the right to abort a child. I am a US citizen as well, who was also surprised by my wifes first pregnancy, but I accepted responsibility. I now have two natural born daughters and one adopted daughter from Guatemala. I didn't think I had the means to deal with our first child, but things have a way of working out.
Thanks - SirDent
a 19 yr old girl in this state got life in prison without parole for killing her baby,,by stabbing it over 100 times,,she was 17 at the time when she hid her pregnancy and got rid of the baby,,,,but i ask would it had been better for this girl to have had abortion than putting the baby thru this horrible death
Wonderful hub. Very touching, sad and thought provoking. God Bless you.
Silly, it would have been better if she hadn't gotten pregnant to begin with. Tell me how many of the 45 million babies who have been aborted since 1973 would have had the same fate? No one can really know can they. Just as none of us even know if we will wake upin the morning. Nobody has a promise of tomorrow.
Bellemerchant, I appreciate the comment.
Are there any circumstances, such as ectopic pregnancy, or a mother needing chemotherapy, in which you think abortion is the lesser evil?
Londongirl. you present a very good question. Let me ask you a question in return first if you don't mind. Is one evil better than another evil?
I am not sure what constitutes an ectopic pregnancy. Maybe you can enlighten me on that.
I will say that most of those who need chemotherapy most likely will not get pregnant. I believe having sex will be the farthest thing from their minds. Of course this is only my opinion, so it may not hold any water at all.
I do appreciate your comment. I also want you to know that this was not written to condemn anyone. It was written to help those who had one to heal, or to educate those who may be thinking of having one.
An ectopic pregnancy is one where the baby, instead of implanting in the uterus, implants instead in the cervix, overies, abdomen or, most usually, the fallopian tubes.
I've written about this myself on this site, here is an extract:
Ectopic pregnancies are dangerous for the mother, and almost invariably fatal pre-viability for the child. There are a handful of examples, worldwide, of pregnancies in the abdomen or tubes resulting in a live birth, but it is extraordinarily unlikely. The most likely outcome is a seriously injured or dead mother, not a living baby.
Many ectopic pregnancies end in a miscarriage, but those which do not are almost all treated by way of a chemical or surgical abortion, depending on what stage the pregnancy has reached and any other medical factors.
It seems to me that ending an ectopic pregnancy should be seen as an ethically and morally correct decision by most people.
Sounds very complicated to me. I do understand what you are saying and appreciate your bringing it out for me. Link me to your hub if you don't mind and I will read it.
Thank you Londongirl. :)
one may have gotten pregnant than they found cancer in her,,,,,so that would be a hard deicision,,, chemo or abortion,,,,
Stumbled upon a site which might be helpful to many. There are a lot of links on the page and others can be found elsewhere on the site.
What you said, needed to be said. This is a very difficult subject to approach. When I first learned of the techniques involved with late trem partial birth abortion, I couldn't believe that it was legal or allowed in this country. It is totally barbaric. The Lord loves us unconditionally and will most certainly forgive anyone who comes to Him carrying this guilt and seeking His forgiveness. Your hub is well written.
"Just imagine, God has a mansion for you and you abort your baby. You come before God and he says, "I had your place all fixed up just the way you like it. Furniture in the right place and everything you can imagine that you like. But look over here at this child. Do you recognize it? It is the very one that you had aborted. He now has your mansion. There is no room for you here.""
This statement is nonsense and totally unBiblical.
1) Only those Born Again now in this age will have mansions, for we are kings and royal priests.
2) In turn this means you are judging Born Again sons and daughters of God at even suggesting the idea that they would abort a child of theirs.
3) The only people who will not be there receiving a mansion is unrepentant mainstream Christians:
Matt 7:21-23 (KJV) Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. 22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? 23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.
You have had your warning and are now without excuse.
Charles Crosby aka yes2truth
Charles, do you ever use your imagination when reading the Bible? I also ask why you pick out one line and use it and not pick out the rest? I suggest you read the whole article.
What do you mean by 'imagination'?
I picked that line out because it was the first error I came across. In paragraph four I think it was. I like to deal with errors one at a time otherwise it gets confusing.
If you had read on, you owuld have seen what else I stated. If you had read on down and read the third paragraph below that statement you owuld have read. ((
I know God most likely won't say that to you. He is a forgiving and merciful God, but many believe they can do whatever they want and God is ok with it. They will lie, cheat, steal, rape, murder, etc. . . and expect God to allow them into heaven. They don't want righteousness nor anything to do with living a holy life before God blameless. Many say they would rather own up to their own sins and carry them alone than to allow Jesus to carry the burden. ))
Who are these 'many' that believe?
As we're talking about chances, is there any chance of an answer to the question in my last comment!!??
Yes2, I would have answered that question if I thought it sdeserved an answer. Open your eyes and look around you. Read the news. Watch Oprah. The answer is everywhere.
You may delete this comment if you think it too far off track but I can't help but comment when I see two of your respondees say men should butt out of the discussion. I have heard this a lot as this idea has been spread far and wide by the Feminist movement. It is wrong. If my baby is being carried by a woman, it is every bit my business if it is to be killed. Since when did fatherhood mean so little?
It is a great hub, though. Very thoughtful and gentle as it can be considering the subject.
James, I am glad you found this hub. Your comment is fine. it is not argumentative and is actually very gentle whie yet stating an opinion. This hub wasd written not for debate, but to heal and help those who had abortions before or are thinking of having one now.
Ge:1:26: And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness:
Man is the image of God and his likeness, so when one is killed he is killed as the image and likeness of God, and this is why Thou shalt not Kill is a law of God, yes it is very sad to see a fellow human as small as they are tossed out as if God made garbage.
I also pity those who support abortion because they don't realize what faces them, unless they come to know God.
Was a moving hub.
God speed
Thank you Hoo for the read and comment. I am encouraged when I get feedback like yours.
Great and well written hub. Stay the course....
Thank you very much BJC.
How interesting that I referenced abortion on your Palestinian hub, and the very next hub I see is this.
Thank you for focusing on the forgiveness rather than the condemnation, SirDent. You are a an example to be followed.
Blessings,
Leslie
Broussadleslie, I appreciate your comment. I am very glad you were able to get the message as you can see that many missed it judging by their comments.
Storytellersrus says:
12 months ago
Sir Dent, why do men feel compelled to write articles like this? I just don't get it. Your job is to help horny men NOT impregnate women who are not ready or able to have babies. Why not focus on yourselves instead of laying blame and full responsibility on the mother to handle 9 months of pregnancy, etc? And when the baby is conceived and brought into the world, why not focus on another area where you can really help, which is making certain every child BORN has the chance to survive abusive parents and live a fulfilling life? I don't get why your sex expends so much energy on abortion and NO energy on educating YOUR sex.