A Funny Bone Is Humerus

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John Ernst Steinbeck, Jr. was an American author of twenty-seven books, including sixteen novels, six non-fiction books, and five collections of short stories
John Ernst Steinbeck, Jr. was an American author of twenty-seven books, including sixteen novels, six non-fiction books, and five collections of short stories | Source
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A Funny Bone Is Humerus

by John Hansen © 2013


Orang-utans are orange,

Blue whales are blue(ish)

Black bears are black

Blackbirds are too(ish).


Boxing rings aren't round,

Brass monkeys aren't apes

Friendships aren't love boats

Grapes of wrath aren't grapes.


Ice cream Sundays aren't a day of the week.

Hamburgers aren't made with ham.

Potato gems aren't valuable,

Doors aren't meant to jam.


Butterflies aren't flies (or made of butter).

Batman's not half bat

Silverfish aren't fish

Meerkats aren't merely cats.


Lady birds aren't birds

Rhinoceros aren't dinosaurus

Cat burglars don't steal cats

.A funny bone is humerus.

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Comments 77 comments

ocfireflies profile image

ocfireflies 2 years ago from North Carolina

Dear Jodah,

My Man Seuss would be proud as am I. Voted Up and always Shared.

As you may imagine, my day has started off with smile. Your poem just helps to keep that smile smiling. Thank You.

Kim


Ericdierker profile image

Ericdierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

How fun. Please do not tell my son that little toads do not sit on little stools in the woods.


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 2 years ago from Shelton

Cute and yes Dr. Suessish..:) voted cute


billybuc profile image

billybuc 2 years ago from Olympia, WA

I was laughing at the title so the rest of this was a bonus. :)


suzettenaples profile image

suzettenaples 2 years ago from Taos, NM

My goodness, this is delightful and whimsical! I so enjoyed reading this!


FlourishAnyway profile image

FlourishAnyway 2 years ago from USA

Very cute! I liked this!


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Dear Kim, glad I could start your day off with a smile. That makes my day. Thanks as always for the vote up and share.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Shhh! Eric, mom's the word. But they don't...lol.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks Frank, I've always been a Dr Seuss fan, so am humbled by the comparison.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks Bill, yeah the title just had to be written..glad it raised a laugh.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks Suzette, glad you enjoyed it too.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thank you Flourish. I think they need a new category for voting up, "cute"...haha.


Jackie Lynnley profile image

Jackie Lynnley 2 years ago from The Beautiful South

Well this sure struck my funny bone, lol, very good.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 2 years ago from TEXAS

You've such a flair for wit and whimsy. I love this! (giggling)


Vellur profile image

Vellur 2 years ago from Dubai

Great poem, enjoyed reading.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thank you,

Jackie, hope your funny bone recovers soon..

Nellieanna, good to see you and glad I could get you giggling. I appreciate your comment, yep I'm on a whimsical streak.

Velour, glad you enjoyed this.


Kamalesh050 profile image

Kamalesh050 2 years ago from Sahaganj, Dist. Hooghly, West Bengal, India

Beautiful and funny... very much enjoyed the poem. Well done!

Have a good day. Best Wishes, Kamalesh


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Hi Kamalesh,

Thanks for visiting and taking the time to read this poem. Your comments are kind. You have a good day too.


tobusiness profile image

tobusiness 2 years ago from Bedfordshire, U.K

This one is charming and so very amusing, one can't help but smile. Nicely done. :)


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Hey Jo, thanks for reading this and your kind comment. Glad it gave you a smile.


Mary McShane profile image

Mary McShane 2 years ago from Fort Lauderdale, Florida

Nicely constructed, voted up and funny.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks for the vote up Mary, glad it tickled your funny bone.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida

One of your best humerus poems, Jodah. Bravo!


jhamann profile image

jhamann 2 years ago from Reno NV

Witty and absolutely entertaining! Well done! Jamie


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Drbj, wow you really think so? Thanks for that compliment. I'm constantly trying to improve my writing, but it is difficult to grow funnier. I just retread your comment...this is my only humerus poem..lol.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Glad you enjoyed it Jamie, thanks for the compliment.


wetnosedogs profile image

wetnosedogs 2 years ago from Alabama

Talented and funny poem. Brightened up my evening. Thanks.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

It makes me happy to know this poem is bringing a few smiles to people. Thanks for your generous comment wetnosedogs.


imocat profile image

imocat 2 years ago from Salt Lake City, Utah

Fun poem! I enjoyed it very much and appreciated the Seussiness of it. It is not easy to write humorous (or humerus) poetry :)

I have a day off today, and am looking forward to reading more of your writing.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Hi Shellie, just as you were reading and commenting on this hub, I was doing the same with one of yours. You will find quite a few of my poems 'humorous', I hope. I like to make people smile, though I also have my serious side in regard to subjects I feel strongly about.

Thank you for comparing this to Dr Seuss, I have had a few such comments for this poem, and that blows me away...he's a long time idol of mine. Thanks for your kind comments, have a great day off.


Eric Flynn profile image

Eric Flynn 2 years ago from Providence, Rhode Island

Jodah, Jodah, Jodah, Jodah (chant)... Fun one.

EWF


CrisSp profile image

CrisSp 2 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

Oh dear, never a disappointment to come back to HP! Very clever! It's not a joke to write something funny, eh? One must possess that certain skill and you're a bang on!

Voted up and sharing!

Cheers!


word55 profile image

word55 2 years ago from Chicago

How about all this. Wonderfully done. Keep up the good work!


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Always good to have you read my hubs Eric, chants are most welcome..haha.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Great to see you back Cris, true it's not a joke unless people find it funny. So being a clown ain't easy...lol. Thanks for your kind comments, voting up and sharing.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Hey word55, thanks for reading, and your wonderful encouragement.


annart profile image

annart 2 years ago from SW England

This is hilarious and so clever! I love it. Like bill, I was already laughing at the title and the rest didn't disappoint. Great. I love plays on words because language is my 'thing'. Thanks for giving me a laugh at the end of the day. Ann


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

My pleasure Ann, it's my aim to make people smile. It doesn't matter if it's to start their day or end it....but a smile's a smile.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 2 years ago from England

lol! I love this! and yes its so true! thanks for making me smile!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 2 years ago from Orlando, FL

Ain't that the truth! Well done! A known fact is the sun does shine! :)


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thank you Nell, the more smiles I am responsible for the better.

Hey Sunshine, afraid I can't argue with that one..lol. Thanks for you kind comment too.


Crystal Tatum profile image

Crystal Tatum 2 years ago from Georgia

Very clever indeed! Voting up and awesome.


Jodah 2 years ago

Thanks for the vote up and kind comment

Jodah


AliciaC profile image

AliciaC 2 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

This is funny and very clever, Jodah! Thanks for the laugh.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thank you Crystal and Alicia, for you generous comments. Glad you got a laugh out of it.


RachaelOhalloran profile image

RachaelOhalloran 2 years ago from United States

I managed to miss this among your hubs, Jodah. You shared it and brought it to my attention and I'm glad you did. This was a hoot. Voted up and funny!


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks Rachael, glad it gave you a laugh. I heave been sharing a few of my hubs that have had fewer views on Facebook and Google+ to increase their traffic. Thanks for the vote up.


Victoria Lynn profile image

Victoria Lynn 2 years ago from Arkansas, USA

So clever! I loved this!!!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn.

Well done Jodah! This tickled my funnybone :)

Voted up and sharing all around.


teaches12345 profile image

teaches12345 2 years ago

You are so clever! I had a great laugh on this post.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks for loving it Victoria Lynn. Have a great day.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks Audrey, for sharing and voting up. Glad it gave you a laugh


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thank you for reading Dianna, glad it gave you a laugh too.


rebeccamealey profile image

rebeccamealey 2 years ago from Northeastern Georgia, USA

Lot's of fun to read, a nice play on words. You're so talented!


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thank you rebecca. You are too kind.


mary615 profile image

mary615 2 years ago from Florida

Congrats on winning a Hubbie Award! This is just too funny!

Voted UP, etc. and shared.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Much appreciated Mary, and thank you for reading this, vote up and share. Glad it hit your funny bone.


Phyllis Doyle profile image

Phyllis Doyle 2 years ago from High desert of Nevada.

I love it, Jodah. Sometimes we just gotta be in a moment of fun. Thank you for this moment, Jodah.


Shyron E Shenko profile image

Shyron E Shenko 2 years ago

John, this is so well done and I enjoyed reading from beginning to end. Now every time I see a butter fly I will think of your poem. It is poems like this that stick in my head.

Wonderful, loved it, voted up across the board and shared.


DDE profile image

DDE 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

A beautiful write here and such a great thought too.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 2 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Of course I'm not surprised this brought a smile to my face! I want to CONGRATULATE you, Jodah! You well-deserve the 2014 Best Poet Award. I'm happy you will continue to grace us and entertain us with your wonderful talents!.....Up++++ Peace, Paula


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

you are so right Phyllis, we have to make time for a moment of fun. Glad his did it for you.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Haha thanks Shyron, sorry to spoil your image of a butterfly.Thanks for the vote up and share.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thank you so much Devika.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks Paula for the congratulations. I was lucky, and I'm not going anywhere soon...got to try to defend my title next year. :)

Appreciate the vote up too. peace.


DealForALiving profile image

DealForALiving 2 years ago from Earth

So imaginative and fun to read. How do you come up with these?


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Hey DealForLiving. The truth is I never know what my mind is going to come up with next. Thanks for your kind comment.


Paula Atwell profile image

Paula Atwell 2 years ago from Cleveland, OH

We have a running joke in our house about Sirius Black from Harry Potter and his brother Humorous


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia Author

Ok Paula, that's funny.... :) thanks for reading.


Shyron E Shenko profile image

Shyron E Shenko 17 months ago

I am back to re-read this, voted up UAFBI and shared.

Funny bones are not funny,

I've banged mine a time or two

Others may think it funny

I don't think you would if it were you

But, your poem was funny as can be

And the funny bones it struck

they aren't where they use to be.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 17 months ago from Queensland Australia Author

haha Shyron, thanks for revisiting and added your fun verse to it....very funny, but funny bones aren't,I agree.


LadyFiddler profile image

LadyFiddler 17 months ago from Somewhere in the West

LOL so Jodah you see the rubbish they teach us from a tender age? lol because the words aren't even related to the item, thing, animal or place.

I speak English and sometimes I say it's a stupid language it has same words , same spellings different meanings e.g. "Read etc . Then they tell us the letter in the word is silent then why is it there ? steups


Jodah profile image

Jodah 17 months ago from Queensland Australia Author

Exactly Lady Fiddler. Nothing makes sense. I don't see the purpose of silent letters either. It's a funny language.


Harry Higinbotham profile image

Harry Higinbotham 14 months ago

This reminds me a lot of Ogden Nash. Is he an influence of yours, John?


Jodah profile image

Jodah 14 months ago from Queensland Australia Author

I can't say he is Harry. I have heard the name but I am not familiar with any of his writing as far as I know. I will have to research him.


Harry Higinbotham profile image

Harry Higinbotham 14 months ago

I highly recommend him. My late aunt introduced my to three wonderful authors: Ogden Nash, James Thurber, and Walt Kelly (Pogo comic strip). They've had a profound impact on my writing style, along with Dr. Suess & Shel Silverstein. BTW- your hubs have inspired me to create my own. I had some initial doubts that my style of poetry would have an audience, but you've proved that it will. I'm excited to begin!


Jodah profile image

Jodah 14 months ago from Queensland Australia Author

Thanks again Harry, I will check out all three authors, though I am familiar with 'Pogo'. Dr Seuss inspired me growing up. I am glad my hubs have actually inspired you as well and I can't wait to read your poetry. Good luck.

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    Jodah profile image

    John Hansen (Jodah)686 Followers
    267 Articles

    John values the use of humour and enjoys writing and reading limericks and jokes. He is a fan of Monty Python, Mr Bean, Black Books etc.



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