I Know A Little Bit About Everything And A Whole Lot About Nothing
I've been everywhere, nowhere, and places in between. During my travels, or non-travels, thoughts just float through my mind. Some are funny, thought provoking, and others are just down-right stupid...so, so mundane.
This list is a compilation of my thoughts and actual experiences, and is not catergorized in any particular order; hence the title; "A Little Bit of Everything and a Whole Lot of Nothing". After reading this you may think "...this chile' is crazy!", or you'll think that my brilliancy exceeds me, which...by the way...are random thoughts too!
1. I think James was mess'n around with Willona on Good Times.
2. If Captain Chesapeake was the Captain of the Chesapeake Bay, then how was Mondy a Sea Monster?
3. I used to think a whopper jr. w/ cheese met the five basic food groups.
4. Did you know that there's a slave cemetery in Cockeysville, Maryland?
5. My son went in the refrigerator again and I yelled at him. He asked, "Can a playa' get a slice of cheese?"
6. I live for today, I dream of tomorrow and I don't miss yesterday.
7. Was Miss Mary Mack her real name? ...Miss Ma-ry Mack, Mack, Mack, all dressed in black, black, black...remember that rhyme? I can't prove it, but I think her real name was Gertrude!
8. House bums of the world unite!
9. Did you know that jockey's on front lawns were used to steer runaway slaves to safe houses?
10. Feed a man fish, and he'll eat for the day. Teach a man to fish and he'll buy a bag of frozen lake trout!
11. I think if my dog could talk, he'd say, "Will you PLEASE shut up!.
12. When life gives you lemons...buy limes, they're cheaper.
13. Put up, stand up, or shut up!
14. It's okay to talk to yourself. It's okay to answer yourself, after you've asked yourself a question. You only have a problem, if you ask yourself to repeat what you said.
15. One day I saw the Blue Bird of Happiness in my backyard...and then a cat ate it...so much for happiness...damn cat!
16. Don't push me, cause' I'll push back...but only harder!
17. Guys who wear their pants off their hind-parts will wonder why they have back and leg problems later in life. Pull your britches up!!!!
18. Why do people throw a fit, but have a ball?
19. Life IS like a box of chocolates...sometimes semi-sweet, and mixed with an occasional nut!
20. I offer no excuses, and I make no apologies.
21. I awoke today feeling energized...recharged, and then realized...I was dream'n.
22. See a penny pick it up, and all day you'll have...a dirty penny.
23. I think Rocky the Squirrel and Bullwinkle the Moose had a little sumth'n going on.
24. I'm still mad at Miss Sally for not calling my name on Romper Room, "...and I see Sharon", was all she had to say!
25. Why do Gas Stations still have Self Service signs? When was the last time you saw a station attendant pump gas?
26. Has anyone else noticed that Mr. Clean is looking m-i-g-h-t-y fine these days?!
27. What came first the chicken or the egg? It doesn't matter...I'll fry em' both!
28. When it rains cats and dogs, should you call animal control?
29. What is the time that heals all wounds?
30. If laughter is the best medicine, then what is the proper dosage?
These are only a portion of my random thoughts. Had I published any more, you'd either be bored, say a prayer, or dial 911!
More by this Author
I went to the store for string beans and now an old lady is grinning at me in aisle 5 about mayonnaise! I said to the old lady, “I hope you’re talk’n bout’ Hellman’s or sumth’n; that better not be a pick-up...
Have you ever wondered what to do with that scarf, or that dressing screen? Well, with a little creativity, you now have a table runner and a headboard.