A Stream of Me
Click below to hear me read this Stream.
Why won’t anyone step up to distract me. I don’t want to be left alone with my thoughts. Oh the chime of new mail.... yeah that distracted me for a total of 96 seconds. Now what? Maybe I could try your thoughts on instead? What do you say, Ya wanta let me roam around in that sizzling gray mass of yours for the evening? Another’s reality for a time, the fun I could have in there. I could take your desires out for a test drive. Try on your fetishes like a child trying on mommy’s pumps. And sit in the seat of your fears, see how they measure up to mine. What makes you sick inside, what makes the clown-paint smile come out and take its place, stretched upon your face? What fears haunt your dreams and dance at the corners of your eye’s? Would you like to trade? Just for the night mind you.
I realize your reality could be worse than mine. Unless your dealing with old ghosts. I don’t give a cotton for old ghosts. They are like old luggage. Some people drag that stuff around, move to move, decade to decade. I guess they figure they’ve invested so much into it, they are not about to let it go. Not me though. I say fill that puppy up with every crap brick and blood stained mortar chunk you can find and throw it’s ass over the side of a ravine. One of those old dump sites where no one would know or care that your abuses, indiscretions and youthful fears lay screaming in Samsonite between an old stained mattress and a perfectly good white wall tire. I say you must leave the past in the... helloooo, past. If not, you are wasting all your energy of today dragging that shit around. So I gotta tell you, if I get your mind for a day, that shits going over board! And in return for me purging your baggage, you can just deal with my reality.
Live in my moment. Take up my cross. Be the ever positive daughter who in the face of mathematical truth, says bullshit! My moment that says choose yourself over your offspring even though it rips against you like the thorns of a blackberry. The offspring who in the same breath says, you are the best mom in the whole wide world and you are ruining my life. Live my moment when the old holds out hope as does the new, but only one can win...me. And not all can be happy, no matter how god damn hard you try or how f***ing big you smile. My moment when prosperity and poverty switch places like the sun and the moon. My moment when the generations of pride you’ve been raised with ends when you step in line take a form and take a number. My moment in time when anything good has the sound of the sweet music you hear in a thriller, right before the knife comes out.
Yours, mine, I’m sure its all bad in different ways. I’d really rather not think at all. What do you say, ya want to just chat for a while?