A Truth Behind Love

Who does it happen to?

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And My Heart Bled

I have spent my life,
Chasing time.
Trying to determine,
The difference of what is wrong vs. what is right.

A constant fight,
One which I have with myself.
Trying to decide,
If I have ever mattered to someone else.

Fairy tales explain,
The way love should be portrayed.
Does it ever happen?
Are people ever that way?

I wouldn’t say I am a skeptic,
But I don’t see love as magic.
I just want to believe,
That someone exists that shares the same dream.

Am I deserving?
I doubt that I am.
But if I’m not sure if love has ever touched me,
How do I know if love is in my hands?

How do I stop shying away?
Hiding my heart,
To keep from feeling pain.

So many mistakes,
And my heart bled.
Never let my heart feel that way,
Never again.

Promises I made to myself,
To keep from falling apart.
Have now crept up to me,
And I have hurt from closing off my heart.

I want to feel safe,
And comfortable in his arms,
And know that tomorrow,
We will be what we are.

Chasing time,
Chasing myself,
Chasing the start,
Of becoming myself.

Is everyone as confused?
As I am about love?
Is it just a fairy tale?
That only happens for some?

I don’t want to fear tomorrow.
I don’t want to live in the past.
But as the past catches up to me,
Will today be able to last?

As I try to trust,
And let him in,
I try to remind myself,
That this is life and not a dream.

I am not perfect,
Our love is real,
We struggle-We argue,
He has taught me how to feel.

With Valentine's Day around the corner, it made me stop to think about falling and being in love and how do we know that our love is real, specially after we have been scorn previously. Sometimes it hurts to let someone love you, and it is scary to give your love to someone, and trust that they will not misuse the power you place in their hands. We compare fairy tales, movies, and other relationships to our own, and always find an issue to make us convince ourselves our love is not true. Every love has it's own ingredients that make it real, and make it unique. Being too strict with love, to the extent that you hold it all in will have you lose out on experiencing one of the most beautiful things that life has to offer. Love is not perfect- We are not perfect- but that it okay, because we don't have to be to be able to share our dreams with someone else.         Happy Valentine's Day...


I Want To Be Loved Like That

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Comments 40 comments

Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 5 years ago from USA or America

Very nicely written Holly. :) Always a pleasure. :)


Nan 5 years ago

Keep writing and you will lose yourself only to find your real self.


ABDELRASOUL profile image

ABDELRASOUL 5 years ago

I guess you have deep wounds!! Only true love to the right person at the reight time will heal them, if you are writing about personal experience you have been through or about somebody's you might have known!


arb profile image

arb 5 years ago from oregon

Ran across this hub hopping. Honest and provacative. Finding love will never complete you nearly as much as giving love. "Better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all. Be well"!


samboiam profile image

samboiam 5 years ago from Texas

Very nice. Can feel your heart in this.


G-Ma Johnson profile image

G-Ma Johnson 5 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

I agree with arb...and love that is true will always be with you even if the person isn't...God Bless..HAPPY VALENTINES DAY MY DEAR...:O) Hugs G-Ma


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Thanks for commenting Cagsil :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

As Always, thank you Nan...I appreciate your comments :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

ABDELRASOUL

Well? Probably not deeper ,than anyone else in the world, I just have a tendency to think about things in an unusual way. I often question, why am I this way or that way...what was it that made a difference...how to change...am I loved etc... It is not about the wounds-although you must let others love you-it is more so about believing in yourself enough to love yourself and give yourself a shot...no matter what you have come through. thanks for the comment


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

arb

So true... but it is still nice to know we are loved. i think being in love is putting someone's needs in front of yours...with no hesitation...no regret and no looking back. Thanks for the comment- I appreciate the feedback and advice :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

samboiam -thank you as always :) I appreciate the feedback!


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

G-Ma Johnson- thank you for the perspective... I am sitting here thinking about all the comments on this one so far, and am glad to see the belief that love exists and that it is possible and probable in life if we allow for it.


carrie450 profile image

carrie450 5 years ago from Winnipeg, Canada

Wonderful poem H.C Porter. Sometimes in life we have to take chances. If we don't or are too afraid we will be alone. Good luck.


A.A. Zavala profile image

A.A. Zavala 5 years ago from Texas

Unfortunately, you have to take a chance and love first to see whether it's true or not. You can get the best signals, and your senses can tell you it's right, but in the end have it fall apart. Thank you for sharing.


Ken R. Abell profile image

Ken R. Abell 5 years ago from ON THE ROAD

A moving, expressive poem that reveals pieces of your heart, & also, expresses the universal truth that love is a complex wonder that has to be worked at over the long haul. Thanks for a great reflection for Valentine's Day.


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 5 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

Am I deserving?

YES you are! Though there are chances that must be taken.


Genna East profile image

Genna East 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

Very honest and touching poem. We are all hurt at times in our lives; we question; perhaps hide a bit, and then take the risk again. Always deserving. :)


brethodge profile image

brethodge 5 years ago from USA

Great poem. I really enjoy reading your hubs as you share so much of yourself. That is a hard thing to do. Looking forward to the next one. Happy Valentines Day to you.


chspublish profile image

chspublish 5 years ago from Ireland

Great sharing of hte intimate feelings and thought of the poet in this piece. Well done.


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

carrie450

Thanks ma'am... you are right. Sometimes we have to close our eyes, hold our breathe and hope for the best before we jump in head first. Happy Vday :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

A.A. Zavala - thanks for the comment. very true, because nothing is ever a guarantee.


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Ken R. Abell- thanks for stopping by and for commenting :)Love is for the most part about trust and faith in yourself for deserving it, and for another whom you are receiving it by... I do believe that to be universal. Happy Vday Ken!


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

mckbirdbks - aww, thanks, as are each and everyone of us- thanks for the kind comment and Happy Vday to you!


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Genna East- Very true, and although it takes time, we must take that risk again, or we will be the ones missing out on a great adventure in life


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

brethodge

thanks bret, haven't seen you around lately-thanks for stopping in and leaving a comment! I truly appreciate the feedback :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

chspublish-thank you-thank you!!! I am glad you enjoyed the poem and left your thoughts! Happy Vday :)


Debarshi Dutta profile image

Debarshi Dutta 5 years ago from Calcutta

Very Nice Hub about The perils of love, Unfulfilled love, Unrequited love, betrayed love, concealed love, your point of view is very clear Ma'am, however..it always depends on whether the other person, too has the same point of view to see the same thing,, as about women ...sadly..they tend they to feel a lot more deeply than men and get more profound about issues ..that most if not all men give the same weight age..there is a certain disconnect there which is without any historical or future solution at all.However if there is, trust, execution of responsibilities, confidence and faith in one's partner then all loves are fairy story loves..no matter how dull they may appear .

That happens to be my assumptions and thank you for sharing your thoughts which also led me to a hunch about your personal resolutions on love.Which is pre-sanctifiable and to make it viable is risk that I guess you have tried to resolve till date.


michael ely profile image

michael ely 5 years ago from Scotland

Hi H.C Porter, I really liked reading this. It came across as being very heart felt and painful and beautifully expressed.

Michael.


Cheeky Girl profile image

Cheeky Girl 5 years ago from UK and Nerujenia

We know love is real, when we are smart enough to know love. To know love, we have to be loved first and lose love. That is a hard lesson. We have all lost love presumably at some early points in our lives. We do chase ourselves, we beat ourselves up worrying over things, doubts, mostly fears, worries...will the person accept me, accept my flaws, accept my family, friends?... We are always bringing some baggage with us, and others have to realise that.

We also have to trust others enough to know things. Like riding a horse, we can hold the reins tightly, because we're afraid the damn horse doesn't know what its doing (it's trying to be a horse...) or we can hold the reins loosely, cos we trust that horse, and he trusts us.

I love that whole trust thing right there. If we don't quite have that intuition yet...we just have to take a leap of faith at times.

This is a really excellent hub, and we can all relate here, H.C. Rating this up! Cheers! :)

Sometimes we have to make others uncomfortable, complacency can sink in - sometimes being a blacksheep or encouraging black sheep to articulate lances the boil of doubts, and frees expression. I believe in open communication and innovating in our friendships with others. We have nothing to lose if they love us...


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Debarshi Dutta

Thanks for the honest and well written response to this hub... Perhaps love is not such a mystery when we stop trying to justify why-how-and if we are deserving... If we just love and let go of the rest-I believe all will be okay... which is what I have come up with :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

michael ely

Thanks- I am glad you liked this poem...love has to do with trust...and trust is tough because we can never be for sure of anything, which was my hearts hurt-to allow the trust to take down the wall and say, okay whatever happens -happens, Thanks for the comment!


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Cheeky Girl

Thank you Miss for the greatness in the comment... Very much appreciated and great to read :)


ahorseback profile image

ahorseback 5 years ago

H.C. Thanks for this , its such a pleasure in life to learn and to know , that so many, old and young think and feel alike! Love can come to you like a brick thrown through the the front window of your heart or like the silent stalking approach on kittens feet. But come it will.Stay well.


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

ahorseback

thank you again for the comment. I am sure life is lurking with love songs and tales...and you are right, there are so many different ways that love shows each of us it is in our lives...Thanks for the thought


Docmo profile image

Docmo 5 years ago from UK

This is thought provoking and dazzled with truth of self- doubt we all have. Love inspires so many emotions, so beautifully. As someone once said, ' at the gateway of my heart,I wrote no thoroughfare- but love came piercing through, and said I come everywhere!'.

Love is leap of faith... And thanks for expressing this so well!


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Docmo

thanks for the compliment, glad you saw the meaning and truth which I wrote on...and liked the expression :)


Capedium profile image

Capedium 4 years ago from Texas.

Please don't stop... I just want to keep reading..

It's a great poem..


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 4 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Thank you-thank you! I appreciate all your comments Capedium, very much so. :)


Minnetonka Twin profile image

Minnetonka Twin 4 years ago from Minnesota

Beautiful, heartfelt and honest poem. Love can be a scary thing when you've had your heart trampled on but it's worth it if you find the right one.


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 4 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Minnetonka Twin- I agree, love is scary but worth the ride for what you get in return. Thanks for reading and leaving me some feedback!

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