Dedicated to my VIP's.
Early last year, I had joined Hubpages and the purpose was to vent my feelings and free my thoughts. Unintentionally, i have angered someone with one of my hub. It scare me off the website for a while, but i still write now and then.
This year, i alternate between publishing and unpublish my work because i was afraid that people might remark on it being a poor attempt at writing. Plus i didn't have the confidence that it may be worth reading. Finally i started on something that is easier and has a cheerful note to it. A hub i could get away with. Excited over the subject i was working on; I went on to publish a second hub on the same day. Something came out of it; one fellow hubber had left a comment and it encouraged me to take another step further by doing what i have always wanted to do.
Write about people that i love and cherish. For they deserve all the respect and admiration due to them. I may not be writing about each one of the amazing person that has lent me their support, for i know that they do not need a hub to testify about how grateful i am to them. In this hub itself, these wonderful young people are related to everyone.
THE TWIST OF LIFE
A few years ago, I made a drastic decision to have a baby boy. The idea was, if i have a baby; he would be my inspiration to live my life well, my anchor from drifting. I don't know if that isn't the most stupid idea to have come across a person's mind (talking about irresponsible); i was confident that the child needs no father figure. I have boys as friends, i am sure he will not be de-manned by not having one in the house. There is my gang of cousin brothers who are the most mature, responsible and coolest guys i know even at a young age.
Finding myself a donor isn't a hard chore; one young man was available and willing at the time. To shorten the story and the unnecessary dramas that accompany 'spur of the moment' decision. Nine months later, i delivered a set of twin girls. No boys; but they are the most beautiful twin babies i have ever seen. Right after the caesarean surgery; i had shown symptoms of Heart Failure. That is the experience i wrote in one of my hub, "A Dedication to A Faithful Friend".
The truth is, after i had my first set of twins, I learned the true meaning of humility. Not a half way experience, it was during these times that the word has a whole lot more to it; than my initial understanding. I also understand what it means to sacrifice silently. Now, three years later, all the pieces are almost falling into place.
For my absence in their lives, for all the disappointments and just for being odd, i hope that i am able to redeem it by loving from afar. "To not belong; yet to have". I gave of myself to my relatives through my children. It may not have much meaning now; it definitely will one day
Thoughts to ponder
If there are mothers out there that had to make a tough decision regarding their children; know this. I know how it feels. I was there. You know you have decided well when you see and hear their Joy and contentment. Remember always, it's not about you, but what's best for them. Because that is what a true mom does.
For those beautiful hearted mom who loves the children that is not from their womb; as their own, I know you and I understand; for there were times in the past where i wanted to do the very thing you do. To you I ask God to shower you and your loved one's with continual blessings.