A Click, a Closing Door

 

My dearest dear, did you not hear

A click, a closing door, a gentle sigh?

The slightest movement of the air;

A furtive interchange of light; an empty space?

Perhaps it was a stranger who walked by.

 

Did someone walk so quietly from my life?

 

A quiet guest who stayed; unwelcome and unsought.

Uninvited tenant in an upstairs room, a shade; no more,

Who’d stopped in passing; leant into my room;

His elbows on the windowsill; leant into my room;        

Leant into my life. Smiled, and yet he spoke no word

Listened to our talk; exchanging not a word.

 

He listened to our conversations,

But did he speak a foreign tongue?

Or listened with a stranger’s ears?

Worse. Oh worse than blindest eyes, or deafest ears.

Yet still he listened to our words; both yours and mine.

 And then, by chance, or cruel design

Poured vials of hatred and confusion in your ears.

 

Who was the stranger who could walk so quietly from my life?

 

Or was this the one, the veiled face on the stair?

I turned to her in passing, and she smiled,

And then I turned once more; she was not there.

Did I decipher from her lips or from her scent;

Translate a gentle warning?  Or did I hear

Someone walk quietly from my life?

 

Or should I have heard? If only I had heard.

 Someone walking quietly from my life?

 

Oh, that I had listened to her voice,

 And disregarded what that other one had said,

Perhaps that step that now I hear,

That furtive step into the night,

Would not have been our fragile love.

 

Did someone walk so quietly from my life?

Did something drift so carelessly away?

 And did I, fool that I am, permit its going?

Or are we partners, not in life,

But guilty partners in our crime?

Partners in our shared internal exile.

Or was it me; my fault alone, that here I stand;

You, slipping silently away… near out of sight.

 

And every night I reach my door

My door; my lonely room, each night;

Later than the night before…    

Just slightly later than the night before,

I hesitate before I turn on the light,

For there, the covers turned so neatly back,

Accentuate your absence; you are not there.

 

Did someone drift so carelessly away from out my life?

My bed is empty as before,

As empty as my heart; my life; my self.

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Comments 22 comments

Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly 5 years ago from St. Louis

This is great, my friend. So many levels. I think for me it captures the confusion that happens at the loss of a relationship. Often there's a such a lack of understanding of what happened, that we can't help but create reasons for it, like the stranger who "poured vials of hate in her ears." it must have been, for what other explanation is there? Really, far above my skills as a commenter.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you so much Chris. I know I wrote it, but it says so well what I aimed it to say. I find it difficult to read it without crying. What a woos! But thanks for reading it and understanding it so clearly.


KKalmes profile image

KKalmes 5 years ago from Chicago, Illinois

My friend, my friend, my friend... exactly, thank you!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Do I take it that you like it? I hope so. The arrogance of the scribbler, me; I love it because it works, for me at least. Thanks for taking the time to read it Kevin.


KKalmes profile image

KKalmes 5 years ago from Chicago, Illinois

Hello Ian, I love it and it left me speechless for a few minutes, but I'm back because we both know words are my thing and I couldn't be without them for very long...

Who was the stranger who could walk so quietly from my life?

Too many times, too of't did I let him go by without a word.

Merry, Merry & Happy, Happy Holidays... just wanted to take a moment this Christmas morning to wish all good cheer and thank you for the comfort of having friends!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thanks for coming back to say some more. These ears are happy to receive words like that. But where did you get the idea that you don't have a poetic soul?

Your opinions mean a hell of a lot to me, Kevin. Yours and very few others'... I feel revitalised.

Enjoy the rest of Christmas Day,

Ian


Candie V profile image

Candie V 5 years ago from Whereever there's wolves!! And Bikers!! Cummon Flash, We need an adventure!

To me - along with what Chris said - was almost about friends we never quite allowed into our lives. Maybe took what another thought and never allowed the relationship to grow. To help us, also, grow. Relationships are so complicated. One of my favorite quotes is from Anais Nin.. "We see things not as they are, but as we are." (if I got that worded correctly). Ah to see things as they truly are!.. thank you TL!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

What a lovely quote. If you read enough of my writing, Candie (and I hope you do), there is a constant stream that runs through: "Things are not as they seem."


Candie V profile image

Candie V 5 years ago from Whereever there's wolves!! And Bikers!! Cummon Flash, We need an adventure!

I'm starting to see that!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Wait till you see my next posting. I hope it says everything that I aimed to say; but I hope it rings true for you.


donna bamford profile image

donna bamford 5 years ago from Canada

It reminds me a bit of an Emily Dickenson poem in style. yes I too like it. Are you at Twilight Lawns?


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

I have never read any Emily Dickenson. Thank you for taking the time to read it and thank you, more, for liking it. I feel honoured, because i love your two that I have read already; 'Snow' and 'Paris'.

Do you mean Twilight Lawns plc by any chance?


donna bamford profile image

donna bamford 5 years ago from Canada

No I am wondering if you are retired like me. Google Emily Dickenson - this is a fine poem. I think Dickenson would like it.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Retired, yes. I just wondered, but of course, you have read my profile and it refers to Twilight Lawns plc. I thought you were on to me for a minute. You have convinced me; I must look into Dickenson, and then take out a contract on her life if she's too good.


Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly 5 years ago from St. Louis

You'll have to dig up Ms. Dickenson first!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

I know Chris, but it would lose it's impact if I were to say that I would like to burn her books and gun down her publisher on Main Street (Did I get the analogy right?)

But I'll dig her up if it makes you happy, you Purist, you!


acaetnna profile image

acaetnna 5 years ago from Guildford

This is beautiful. I am a little sad though because to me it reveals a love that is lost and gone for good.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

I can see a little light at the end of the tunnel in this poem, if you really want one, Acaetnna, but love is love and if we are too careless with it... Thanks for taking the time to read it and your lovely comment.


always exploring profile image

always exploring 5 years ago from Southern Illinois

This is soo beautiful. I can relate. Very touching..Thank you..


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank always exploring. I loved writing it and it really expresses the way I was feeling and am feeling at the moment.


nemanjaboskov profile image

nemanjaboskov 4 years ago from Serbia

I like this poem, in spite of the fact that I never read poetry. I will admit here that your poems are the first poetry I have ever enjoyed (apart from the poetry written by my girlfriend). However, I often have a problem of understanding poetry, as, in my opinion, a poem is something very deep and personal. Ten people could read a poem and understand it in ten different ways, and that is probably the beauty of poetry, as well as the beauty of literature in general.

For me, I didn't see any light at the end of the tunnel here. I only saw sadness and the loss of true love, but that is all a part of life, right?


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you for reading it, Nemanja. I have tried to protect you from my poetry, and here you make me smile proudly when you say such nice things about it...them.

Yes, there is only sadness and loneliness in this piece. But as you say, it is all a part of life, and life can deal some very strange cards.

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