Anatomy of a Typical Guy Meets Girl Movie
(Peppy music plays.) Boy meets girl, but one is better than the other. Usually the guy is substandard, but sometimes as a twist, it is the girl who is inferior. However, some accident of fate throws them together and they go out. Friends point out the relationship is doomed while conversely encouraging them to pursue it.
Girl (usually) gives guy a chance, but he blows it. Friends commiserate, tell him it is hopeless, but encourage him to try again anyway. He does try again and is so inept and bumbling, it is simply charming. Girl agrees to go out again. Guy is happy, friends are amazed.
(Upbeat romantic music erupts.) Scenes fly by. Guy and girl on a bridge. Guy and girl laughing and drinking sodas together. Guy and girl at ball game. Guy and girl having a water fight. Guy and girl getting very intimate.
Then someone blows it again, usually the guy. Or there is an enormous misunderstanding, the type that never takes place in real life. Or they have a terrible argument over something about which no two sane people in the real world would ever argue. They break up.
(Sad romantic music now plays.) Guy walks alone. Guy eats alone. Guy is depressed and sees girl from a distance, but she ignores him. Or he tries to talk to her and she snubs him. Girl is righteously indignant. Guy wanders forsaken in a bleak world of solitary trips to the mall or he revisits their old romantic haunts, but this time alone. The idea is put forth that he is miserable. She is also miserable, but not as miserable as he is. Tension rises in the movie. Friends again commiserate and tell him it was never meant to be. They tell her it was never meant to be.
Some tragic event throws them back together. They suddenly realize he has been wrong and is indeed a complete fool. They both experience this epiphany simultaneously. This generally happens in a large crowd of people, for instance in a subway terminal, airport, or a huge party. Timing for this amazing revelation is almost always just as one or the other of them is ready to leave for a distant location where he or she will disappear into a void of un-findability. Therefore, there is an undeniable urgency to this exchange. Their pressing and cataclysmic reconciliation draws the attention of the crowd.
These total strangers completely forget their own concerns and lives at this point. They watch and listen with rapt fascination as girl admits to a few minor mistakes and guy admits to massive lapses in judgment. They kiss and the crowd applauds, inappropriately interested in this interaction which has no bearing whatsoever on their own personal situations. (Bright happy music ensues.) Crowd loses interest. Guy and girl now start their new future together and the movie is over. (Bouncy romantic music blares until the end of the movie and throughout the roll of the credits.)
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