Believing the lies you tell to the world-Living a life of abuse
Not all moments are bad...
A Day in Paradise?
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- Prose Poetry- As the Violins Play in the Background
HC Porter writes more Prose Poetry with stunning imagery from both words and pictorial displays. Prose Poetry on HubPages.com, by HC Porter
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Prose Poetry by HC Porter, about growing older and coming to terms with your troubled past. A past you must face in order to let go of. A Poem by H.C Porter
Self Medicating-Self Loathing-Self Creating into whatever the situation is called for
Beautifully Written... Painfully Touching... Unfortunately Relatable...Is what is thought when a shattered mother stands up to tell her story.
Real fear is so very personal
Some days it is easier to believe the lies that you tell the world in which you live
The world you escape to, to release the truth so you can begin to breathe-is hidden from the one whom you fear.
Self Medicating-Self Loathing-Self Creating into whatever the situation is called for-
Not all moments are bad-but you never feel as if they are truly good.
Do what you must to survive--survive for the only good you have done in your life.
It is your priority to protect the innocence,
The innocence is your reasons to live your lie, and escape to dream a better reality.
Each and every moment-although never said is planned to the exact minuet detail.
Even the exact curve to your non threatening stance, is thought about before being carefully displayed.
You think to yourself, what have I become?
You do not know-this is something that you realize,
You also realize that this is not who you should be.
The bitterness is sometimes sweet-all too often it is also sour.
Bite your tongue, watch your weight, don’t say a word, and don’t talk to a single soul.
At one time you thought you were a princess and a prince was there to rescue you from the dungeon and shield you from an evil world.
You were wrong and your prince has locked you in a tower-
to display you-to control you-to blind you with the gifts that come after his cruel words and tantrums.
You have become an accessory.
When your colors fade-and you are worn thin, you fear he will toss you out?
Why do you fear what you pray for?
How does someone stay in a place where they are treated as if they are less than worthy of existing.
What can I say to make you see, you are worth more than what you have been taking?
Feed the pain with the pills-with the lines-with the lies.
You say you stay for them-which is why you are losing you.
I feel it, you are slowly dieing.
If you fear the life you live, escape to another life worth living.
Are you to blame for staying?
Are you to blame for the lies that you tell the world?
No one truly knows who you are.
Your face to the world is a mask to hide the bruises, tears and shattered dreams.
The fear of disappointing the world with the news that you are not as collected-beautiful-strong-fearless as you portray yourself to be, creates a new level to the fear you already endure.
It isn’t always bad-someday you hope to feel good.
You pray he will change, he will see you for all the strengths, desires, hopes and abilities you once had.
He has to change; you don’t know how long you can keep this lie that is your life’s existence.
Tell the world that he loves you…
Tell yourself he will change,
Tell yourself what you are doing to survive each day living in a blinding shadow is okay.
Believe that the good you harbor within you will persevere and guide you towards a better existence.
Believe that you are the problem and the words that he speaks are the truth and you are crazy for thinking or feeling a single thoughts of doubt.
He tells you that you don’t deserve more than what he gives to you.
He tells you that this is the only place you can be.
He tells you that no one else wants you.
You believe him.
What you know is; he will never work with you-will never compromise-will never hold you up so you can flourish in the light.
He cares not what you could be-what you want to be-what you are capable of being.
Why do you keep trying to make him see?
Tell the world that the life in which you are living is blessed and great and a new level of heaven-
Don’t tell me- I know that heaven should not feel like hell.
I know that the one who loves, loves with no regret and loves selflessly.
I believe the lies that are told to the world are lies that are made up of fear-and that the life worth living that is now an escape-should not be hidden but shared between lovers.
I see so much more of the world beauty-than words of disrespect-hurt-and disgrace
The plan to escape will be the most intensely planned production imaginable-
Because this is the most real sense of fear you know.
With no intermission----This is life...
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