Black Wolf of Mine

My Black Wolf
My Black Wolf | Source

Farewell

9/3/2013

Black wolf of mine who will not allow yourself to love me as freely as you would like to, comfort yourself, once more, within my arms before you leave again to hunt for your own death. I see now that the hope and love you see in me just adds to the torment that you feel in this world. I see now that the peace that I bring you only provides for small breaks from your constant pain. I know what it is to be stuck in a world you were not made for and do not belong in. I am sorry that I couldn't save you. I honestly never aimed to save you because I am not sure how to. My aim was not to change you either. My only aim was to bring you peace and love. I wanted to sit with you in your dark places and embrace you for a time. I do not doubt your love for me and I know that you would die for me but I also know that you can't bare to live for me or anything or anyone and I know that I live in the shadows of your past. All I can ever be is the same as anything else that comes into your life at this point and that is second to your past. Just a good thing for what you once were not for what you are now. If this world is your hell as it is for so many here, I would have sat in it beside you but it seems that you have sealed my fate in this story. I am destined to join the ghosts in a past that haunts you or face losing you to your own demise. I wish I were strong enough to help rid you of this life but as you limp to me, broken and bleeding, all I can bring myself to do is lay beside you, lick your wounds, and share my warmth. All I can ever do is fail to heal you day after day as I curb my pain to stare into your lost eyes and empty soul. Still, this wolf is all that I have ever known you to be and it would have been enough for me. Although the hardest thing in the world to do is to stand by you as you fade away, I can't leave you to face it alone regardless of the price I will pay. The past fills your eyes so that you don't see life and you don't see me but I will remain by your side as long as I can until you chose death or decide to let in some kind of life whether or not its by my side.

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Comments 6 comments

writinglover profile image

writinglover 3 years ago from Lost...In Poetry

This was beautiful! I loved the pictures of the wolves and your narration. I suppose that the person in question in your hub confined himself to solitude (before his death) and it makes me think that some wolves are solitary creatures (not all, of course). Voted it up!


Moms-Secret profile image

Moms-Secret 3 years ago from Central Florida Author

No, I agree. I think that they all are solitary creatures which means that they can exist and thrive alone but it doesn't mean that they do not or cannot connect. I think once a connection is made, it is fiercely protected since it isn't something that they require. It is treated like a rarity.

Always nice to talk to you here Writinglover :)


cleaner3 profile image

cleaner3 3 years ago from Pueblo, Colorado

wow... love this piece here ..Moms secret.. thoughts that I would say could only come from a female .. to her mate for life ..until death ..very powerful and touching .. humans ..very few know how to say much less write words like this .. maybe that is why animals don't speak ?

It makes me wonder... that is the reason they use instincts to communicate ..with their eyes and actions.. to one another .. humans could learn from the wolves who would die for their mate.. must read this again.!

Michael


Moms-Secret profile image

Moms-Secret 3 years ago from Central Florida Author

Thank you Michael. Humanity is often just as strange and confusing to me as I imagine it is to the animals around us but individually we are not a lost cause. Hahaha. I am so happy that you are enjoying my readings and that you find them to be different.


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 3 years ago from Shelton

I got a moribid feel after reading black wolf of mine Moms,


Moms-Secret profile image

Moms-Secret 3 years ago from Central Florida Author

Hi Frank! I have been told that I can come across as this strange combination of hopeful morbidness. Hahaha, I always thought it was a funny way to describe my mess.

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